How Do Men Feel When its Over if they Ended It [an affair]?

[Sweetgirlie]

I am sure it depends on the affair etc...

[ladydesigner]

I am sure it depends on the affair etc...

 

My WH ended his A with MOW because I caught them and he resumed with her immediately after me telling him to go no contact with her. They ended and continued many times including taking the A underground. Their A has been over now for a year, but they were together 3 years in total.

 

I absolutely believe my WH felt panicked about losing MOW and he did love her.

[Sweetgirlie]

My WH ended his A with MOW because I caught them and he resumed with her immediately after me telling him to go no contact with her. They ended and continued many times including taking the A underground. Their A has been over now for a year, but they were together 3 years in total.

 

I absolutely believe my WH felt panicked about losing MOW and he did love her.

How do you know they ended and continued many times? How long in between and forgive me but aren't all affairs "underground" and what is the difference? Thanks!

[Adoraxx]

@sweetgirlie, I think my MM always felt relieved because now he could go on and be the GOOD husband again

[Popsicle]

Great question!!! (Sadly, we don't have many men here who've had A's, so it'll just be a bunch of women and BS's speculating.)

[Popsicle]

@sweetgirlie, I think my MM always felt relieved because now he could go on and be the GOOD husband again

 

Yes I would think that if it was his choice to end it (and not OW or BW forcing it) then he would be somewhat relieved.

[privategal]

My xmm ended it quite a few times and each time I could tell it was hard on him but also that it was something he knew he had to do and he was doing it as if pulling off a bandaid...quickly and awkwardly. A few times he just went dark and it was cold and hurtful but he was avoiding conflict for himself.

If it was guilt or loss of feelings or exhaustion from living a lie its most likely relief but I believe its heavy on them and they feel bad but mine loved his wife and after a dday I think he realized that even moreso.

He's always found a reason to keep reaching out eventually though and wants friendship which is selfish as that relieves his guilt towards me and feels to him like a win win....a loving wife and forgiving friend. Its all a crock of sh%!

[cocorico]

I am sure it depends on the affair etc...

 

I'm sure it does. I'm sure how, and why, they end it, also makes a difference. For men who break off an A out of concern for the kids, say, their responses would be rather different to men who break it off because they have gotten bored, or consider the OW to have become too needy, or fancy an OOW...

[NewLeaf512]

I don't believe they care in the slightest

[MissBee]

I am sure it depends on the affair etc...

 

Precisely.

 

"Men" don't feel one particular way about it. Different men will feel differently depending on different things. There is really no way to answer this. It's like asking "How do men feel about vanilla ice-cream?" There is no answer for this beyond saying that different men will feel differently about it.

[road]

I'm sure it does. I'm sure how, and why, they end it, also makes a difference. For men who break off an A out of concern for the kids, say, their responses would be rather different to men who break it off because they have gotten bored, or consider the OW to have become too needy, or fancy an OOW...

 

They lie and cheat to get into the affair and while during the affair. So yet they can be believed what the said, why they ended the affair?