Author GilesB Posted September 13, 2015 Author Posted September 13, 2015 I left my phone because I had my old phone stolen from the same place a few months ago so didn't want to risk it. I did tell him that I was out for my friends birthday weekend so I hope he would understand as he doesn't always call or text me back straight away. My mind has been on so many things this week so I'm trying not to let it affect me but I would love to have his support with a few things. Could I text him asking him to call me back when he can?
katiegrl Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 (edited) I left my phone because I had my old phone stolen from the same place a few months ago so didn't want to risk it. I did tell him that I was out for my friends birthday weekend so I hope he would understand as he doesn't always call or text me back straight away. My mind has been on so many things this week so I'm trying not to let it affect me **** but I would love to have his support with a few things. **** Could I text him asking him to call me back when he can? Again, you, you, you. Ugh. Yeah, I bet HE would like YOUR support with a few things too, but you've been too busy taking pub quizzes, and partying. No don't text him again. You have called him twice, wait until he gets back to you. He may not....he may be done. Edited September 13, 2015 by katiegrl 1
Gaeta Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 I left my phone because I had my old phone stolen from the same place a few months ago so didn't want to risk it. I did tell him that I was out for my friends birthday weekend so I hope he would understand as he doesn't always call or text me back straight away. My mind has been on so many things this week so I'm trying not to let it affect me but I would love to have his support with a few things. Could I text him asking him to call me back when he can? So Giles: Why would he call you back? What do you have to offer this man? 1
bcnguy Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 I think I agree with previous posters. He may feel that you played too hard to get at this point.better luck next time
cif Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 Text him inviting him over for that dinner. You're in a LDR so don't ask him to do things for you like he's a handy man.
Gaeta Posted September 14, 2015 Posted September 14, 2015 So we are Monday, probably late Monday for you, any dinner or any news?
cif Posted September 14, 2015 Posted September 14, 2015 Reading OP's past threads, she's been having issues with this guy from the beginning. We can't help if you're not honest with us. And like Gaeta asked, any updates?
Author GilesB Posted September 15, 2015 Author Posted September 15, 2015 So I texted him on Sunday and he replied straight away saying 'just having dinner. Will call you when I get home xx'I replied saying 'ok no problem x'. I knew it would probably be late when he got home. I had fallen asleep but got a text from him at midnight saying 'what a fun ride home haha. I'm going to crash so will call you tomorrow. Sleepy dreams xx'. I text him yesterday morning saying 'haha I slept like a baby. Hope you have a good day x' He didn't call me last night, but I got a call from my sister saying she has found a lump in her breast so is at the doctors. I burst into tears and tried to call him. It was 11:30pm. He didn't answer so I just sent him a text to say please can you call me when you can. I really need someone to talk to' He didn't read the message until this morning and replied a few mins later saying 'morning, sorry I missed your call. Are you ok now?' I replied saying 'I'll be ok, just I shock. I've got the day off work. It would be great to hear from you later. Hope you have a good day.' I know work may be busy for him so I just left it at that and now I'm praying he will get back to me!! He never usually texts with kisses so the fact he did on Sunday may mean he is still interested but then to not call me when he said he would really upsets me. He may have been asleep but I'm just going a bit crazy. My friend and her boyfriend have invited us to TGI's on Thursday which I told him about but I don't know if he is free because he hasn't said!! I feel I've done all I can now. It just annoys me that he is sending me mixed signals so I don't know if he is playing me
Redhead14 Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 So I texted him on Sunday and he replied straight away saying 'just having dinner. Will call you when I get home xx'I replied saying 'ok no problem x'. I knew it would probably be late when he got home. I had fallen asleep but got a text from him at midnight saying 'what a fun ride home haha. I'm going to crash so will call you tomorrow. Sleepy dreams xx'. I text him yesterday morning saying 'haha I slept like a baby. Hope you have a good day x' He didn't call me last night, but I got a call from my sister saying she has found a lump in her breast so is at the doctors. I burst into tears and tried to call him. It was 11:30pm. He didn't answer so I just sent him a text to say please can you call me when you can. I really need someone to talk to' He didn't read the message until this morning and replied a few mins later saying 'morning, sorry I missed your call. Are you ok now?' I replied saying 'I'll be ok, just I shock. I've got the day off work. It would be great to hear from you later. Hope you have a good day.' I know work may be busy for him so I just left it at that and now I'm praying he will get back to me!! He never usually texts with kisses so the fact he did on Sunday may mean he is still interested but then to not call me when he said he would really upsets me. He may have been asleep but I'm just going a bit crazy. My friend and her boyfriend have invited us to TGI's on Thursday which I told him about but I don't know if he is free because he hasn't said!! I feel I've done all I can now. It just annoys me that he is sending me mixed signals so I don't know if he is playing me GilesB, you gotta back off of this guy. You dated him for two months and he basically fell off the map. You don't have enough of a connection with him to be going to to him for support anyway. Now you're playing the damsel in distress card, hoping he'll feel sorry enough for you to come to your rescue. He's not sending mixed signals. You're doing the initiating, he's responding to be nice, but when you do that you still wonder if he would have done it on his own. He's not playing you, you are playing yourself. Let him come to you if he's going to. I'd say, he's not. I would be happy for you if he did, but you should just keep moving forward with your own life and date others.
Gaeta Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 So I texted him on Sunday and he replied straight away saying 'just having dinner. Will call you when I get home xx'I replied saying 'ok no problem x'. I knew it would probably be late when he got home. I had fallen asleep but got a text from him at midnight saying 'what a fun ride home haha. I'm going to crash so will call you tomorrow. Sleepy dreams xx'. I text him yesterday morning saying 'haha I slept like a baby. Hope you have a good day x' Where's your dinner invitation? Do you want a relationship with this man or not? He's been planning and inviting for 2 months. What exactly are you waiting for to jump on board? but I got a call from my sister saying she has found a lump in her breast so is at the doctors. I burst into tears and tried to call him. It was 11:30pm. He didn't answer so I just sent him a text to say please can you call me when you can. I really need someone to talk to' I am very sorry for your sister but I assure you a lump in the breast 90% of the time it's nothing. Breast cancer in young women is very rare. That being said there you go again making yourself the center of attention and wanting something from HIM. When you have bad news like this you don't call someone you've been casually dating, you call your best friend! And no you have not done enough. You've done nothing. You just reached out to him in a moment of need like the usual. 2
katiegrl Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 TBH, if some guy I *just* met told me I had *infinite power over him,* I would be silently laughing, would have politely excused myself and left. Between that and his not sleeping and everything else he said, my first thought would be is on some sort of a manic high, maybe Bipolar, and needs to go back on his meds! Lol
katiegrl Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 TBH, if some guy I *just* met told me I had *infinite power over him,* I would be silently laughing, would have politely excused myself and left. Between that and his not sleeping and everything else he said, my first thought would be is on some sort of a manic high, maybe Bipolar, and needs to go back on his meds! Lol ^^^^Sorry guys posted on wrong thread!!!!!!!! Arghhhh! 1
Author GilesB Posted September 15, 2015 Author Posted September 15, 2015 Gaeta I was going to ask him on a dinner date but our friends invited us to TGI's on Thursday so I suggested that to him. He just text me to say ‘that doesn’t sounds good at all I’m busy later but I’ll try to call before too late x’ To be honest I’m amazed he texted after me being so uptight. Any advice on what I can reply??
Author GilesB Posted September 15, 2015 Author Posted September 15, 2015 I'm lucky to have him if I'm honest. I think having all this bad stuff happen in my family recently I haven't been myself and I hate not being my normal happy self. I really do appreciate everyone's advice and I know I'm being silly and self centred. I'm just rubbish at expressing my feelings in the right way. If he is still texting I guess he must like me beyond my selfishness. I want to make it up to him.
Gaeta Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 Gaeta I was going to ask him on a dinner date but our friends invited us to TGI's on Thursday so I suggested that to him. He just text me to say ‘that doesn’t sounds good at all I’m busy later but I’ll try to call before too late x’ To be honest I’m amazed he texted after me being so uptight. Any advice on what I can reply?? INVITE HIM TO DINNER. Inviting him to a friend outing is NOTHING like being invited to your home for a one-on-one dinner. Inviting him to a group activity screams you see him as a friend, not a boyfriend.
katiegrl Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 (edited) INVITE HIM TO DINNER. Inviting him to a friend outing is NOTHING like being invited to your home for a one-on-one dinner. Inviting him to a group activity screams you see him as a friend, not a boyfriend. Agree and seriously Giles, by Thursday it will TWO WEEKS since you have seen him ...and you invite him out with your friends? He is sick of hearing about your *friends*!! Let alone getting together with them, geez. No wonder he said it's not a good idea at all....he is probably shaking his head at your naivete for not realizing this.... I do think this guy may be done... He is going through the motions but is checking out. Your self-centeredness was just too much for him to take... Edited September 15, 2015 by katiegrl
stillafool Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 I left my phone because I had my old phone stolen from the same place a few months ago so didn't want to risk it. I did tell him that I was out for my friends birthday weekend so I hope he would understand as he doesn't always call or text me back straight away. My mind has been on so many things this week so I'm trying not to let it affect me but I would love to have his support with a few things. Could I text him asking him to call me back when he can? When exactly are you going to do something for him instead of asking something of him? What happened to you asking him to dinner? 1
Author GilesB Posted September 15, 2015 Author Posted September 15, 2015 No sorry he was replying to my text about me saying that I had had some sad news and it was a shock. He seemed excited about going to dinner. Sorry I worded it confusingly. I will invite him to dinner! I just wanted to know if I need to say sorry to him when I reply? I was going to say 'sorry if I freaked you out. You're so lovely and I'm lucky to have you ' Maybe that's completely wrong so that's why I'm asking...you guys are the experts
Redhead14 Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 No sorry he was replying to my text about me saying that I had had some sad news and it was a shock. He seemed excited about going to dinner. Sorry I worded it confusingly. I will invite him to dinner! I just wanted to know if I need to say sorry to him when I reply? I was going to say 'sorry if I freaked you out. You're so lovely and I'm lucky to have you ' Maybe that's completely wrong so that's why I'm asking...you guys are the experts You're so lovely and I'm lucky to have you ' -- You don't HAVE him yet. Don't pour on him too much. He hasn't earned it yet. Simply thank him for reaching out. Ask him to dinner and then let him have the reins back again. In other words, if he accepts, go out with him and then let him initiate the next date or two. Be receptive and responsive moving forward. And, since he's said he likes you to initiate more, go ahead and do that, but don't go overboard with it either.
Gaeta Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 GilesB: How old are you again? Don't you want to get this guy alone with you? I don't mean disrespect but you think and act like a pre-teen excited to have a boyfriend because it's cool. Not like a woman who's looking forward to experience attraction and closeness. 2
katiegrl Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 No sorry he was replying to my text about me saying that I had had some sad news and it was a shock. He seemed excited about going to dinner. Sorry I worded it confusingly. I will invite him to dinner! I just wanted to know if I need to say sorry to him when I reply? I was going to say 'sorry if I freaked you out. You're so lovely and I'm lucky to have you ' Maybe that's completely wrong so that's why I'm asking...you guys are the experts Okay good, so you will see him on Thursday.... See how that goes and if all goes well, ask him for dinner ..and tell him you feel lucky to have him....which you are! And like Redhead said, please stop playing lil miss damsel in distress! He is not your saviour!! Nor is he your handyman... or your therapist....ugh. You need "support" go to friends and family, not a man you have only been dating two months. Or see a therapist. Good luck hun and have fun on Thursday! 1
katiegrl Posted September 15, 2015 Posted September 15, 2015 GilesB: How old are you again? Don't you want to get this guy alone with you? I don't mean disrespect but you think and act like a pre-teen excited to have a boyfriend because it's cool. Not like a woman who's looking forward to experience attraction and closeness. LOL .......and very true! 1
Author GilesB Posted September 15, 2015 Author Posted September 15, 2015 Thank you all!! I hVent had a proper relationship before which is why I'm probably acting immature and selfish. We are both 23. I'm just going to chill out now and if he calls me tonight I'll stay calm whilst thanking him for reaching out. Thanks again everyone! I'll let you know how it goes.
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