Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Thank you so much for your help. I have a great thing I can ask him to help me with. I'm going to make cake pops for the hospital I work at and he said he would love to help me a while ago when I said I'd make them. Shall I text him and ask if he wants to help me make them on Monday night?
Gaeta Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 Shall I text him and ask if he wants to help me make them on Monday night? No no no no..... You invite him over for dinner. Only mention : I would like to invite you over for dinner Monday? Nothing else. You don't need to give him a reason for his visit like *help with a desk or * help with cupcake. His ONLY reason should be to go see you. Then when you are together at home after dinner you can mention Hey! lets make those cup cakes! 2
katiegrl Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 Thank you so much for your help. I have a great thing I can ask him to help me with. I'm going to make cake pops for the hospital I work at and he said he would love to help me a while ago when I said I'd make them. Shall I text him and ask if he wants to help me make them on Monday night? No don't ask him to help you with anything. Ask him out on a date (something casual and fun, like splitting appetizers at a pub).....or invite him for dinner. Preferably invite him for dinner.
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Ok thanks guys. Wow I'm so glad I asked for advice. I'm really nervous about asking him but I think it's a good move to make as we are 'in a relationship' So to confirm, I'll say 'Hey! Would you like to come over for dinner on Monday?'
Gaeta Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 So to confirm, I'll say 'Hey! Would you like to come over for dinner on Monday?' Yes !! Bingo :-)
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Also I could say we can play uno which is one of his favourite games
Gaeta Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 GilesB: You call him your boyfriend. Did you have a talk together about dating exclusively? How long ago was that?
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Thank you!! Ok so should I send it now or wait until tomorrow morning?
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Well we aren't 'official' but my friends call him my boyfriend and he didn't say he wasn't my boyfriend when they said that in front of him. I want to ask him but I could do that when I see him as if prefer to ask him face to face
Gaeta Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 Also I could say we can play uno which is one of his favourite games No.... You just invite him over for dinner. Nothing else. Why do you feel you have to attract him with something else? You think just an invitation to dinner is not interesting enough to him? Once he's at your place you can play or do anything you want. You don't need to attract him with games or needing help with something
Gaeta Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 Thank you!! Ok so should I send it now or wait until tomorrow morning? Monday Morning is too late to invite him over for dinner on that same day. Make your invitation a couple of days in advance.
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 It's Midnight on Friday here so if I send it tomorrow (Saturday) morning as it gives him a chance to sleep because I think I'd wake him now if I texted him. I'll definitely let you guys know how it goes. Thanks again everyone 1
katiegrl Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 Giles, wondering ....don't you *want* to do something nice for *him*? To let him know you think he is special? Do you not think guys need that too? They do!! All I am hearing is he did all the initiating ...you didn't mind, you need him to help you fix your chest if drawers, you need help making pops ....you, you, you. A relationship is not all about your needs, and what a man can do for you. YOU need to extend yourself to him too, give to him, ...so he knows YOU care. If it were me ...with all the initiating, etc he has done ... I would be texting him NOW with that invite! Right now, based on your actions (or non-actions), he could be thinking you are feeling meh about this whole thing. He may be feeling very sad about that. For me, I would not want my bf feeling that way, I care about him and his feelings too much for that. Call or text him now...I mean why wait? What's the point of waiting?
katiegrl Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 It's Midnight on Friday here so if I send it tomorrow (Saturday) morning as it gives him a chance to sleep because I think I'd wake him now if I texted him. I'll definitely let you guys know how it goes. Thanks again everyone Okay did not realize the time difference. Tomorrow morning sounds good! :)1
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 I'm happy to text him now. Looking back on the texts I feel I've been acting low and he's tried cheering me up but I don't seem that focused on him. I'll send him the text now and see what he says
katiegrl Posted September 11, 2015 Posted September 11, 2015 I'm happy to text him now. Looking back on the texts I feel I've been acting low and he's tried cheering me up but I don't seem that focused on him. I'll send him the text now and see what he says Sweetie it's okay, wait till the morning... Try and relax ...get some sleep.
Author GilesB Posted September 11, 2015 Author Posted September 11, 2015 Ok I will, thank you for your support. I really appreciate it
Poppygoodwill Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 I've been lurking here, but dying to know what happened next in the story! 1
Author GilesB Posted September 13, 2015 Author Posted September 13, 2015 Sorry for the delay in update. So he actually texted me first on Saturday morning to say he is enjoying his lazy Saturday. I texted back and said it was my friends birthday and we're going to a trampoline park. He said that sounded cool. Later on I left my phone at home while we went out dancing. I got back to a missed call from him. It was 2:30am so I didn't want to call him so I texted him apologising and said I had been out and would call him today. I called him a couple of hours ago but he didn't pick up.... I don't know if he doesn't have his phone on him or he is upset with me. I mean he knew I was busy so I hope he isn't mad at me and I did appologise. Shall I try calling again or text asking him to call me?
lana-banana Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 I'm probably being dumber than usual, but do you actually like this guy? You aren't acting like it. When was your last date? Of course you should call or text him soon. If you are interested, why not schedule another one for next weekend? 2
Author GilesB Posted September 13, 2015 Author Posted September 13, 2015 Yes I like him a lot!! I don't want to lose him but I don't want to call him a million times. I was thinking I'd try once again and if he doesn't answer ask him to call me when he can?
katiegrl Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 (edited) Yes I like him a lot!! I don't want to lose him but I don't want to call him a million times. I was thinking I'd try once again and if he doesn't answer ask him to call me when he can? I thought you were going to ask him to get together on Monday or ask him for dinner? What happened? He even called you first on Saturday!! Instead, you announce you are going to a party, then go out dancing, without your phone, and when you notice he had called while you were out partying, did not bother responding till the next day. Between this, and your preferring to partake in a pub quiz rather than talk to your own boyfriend whom you have not seen or talked to much in nine days, among other things, I suspect he doesn't think you give a shyt. You say you do .... so you better start acting like it party girl, or you're gonna lose him. IMO you need to learn how to be in a relationship, you sound completely self-centered. My two cents... Edited September 13, 2015 by katiegrl 2
Gaeta Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 Sorry for the delay in update. So he actually texted me first on Saturday morning to say he is enjoying his lazy Saturday. I texted back and said it was my friends birthday and we're going to a trampoline park. He said that sounded cool. Later on I left my phone at home while we went out dancing. I got back to a missed call from him. It was 2:30am so I didn't want to call him so I texted him apologising and said I had been out and would call him today. I called him a couple of hours ago but he didn't pick up.... I don't know if he doesn't have his phone on him or he is upset with me. I mean he knew I was busy so I hope he isn't mad at me and I did appologise. Shall I try calling again or text asking him to call me? Where is your dinner invitation??? He texted you Saturday why didn't you make your dinner invitation then? Why do you leave your phone home when you go out?? You don't act very interested. It's like you think you shouldn't be doing anything or put out any efforts. It's like each time he tries to call you you have an excuse for not picking up or returning his call promptly. 2
Author GilesB Posted September 13, 2015 Author Posted September 13, 2015 I just called him again and no answer. Shall I text him?
katiegrl Posted September 13, 2015 Posted September 13, 2015 I just called him again and no answer. Shall I text him? Did you leave a message? If so, what did you say? I dunno Giles, it may be too late. You have been acting really elusive (and like you don't give a crap) for awhile now, it's not just this one incident. He may be fed up and turned off at this point. Lesson learned for next time.... When you like a guy, ACT like it. That doesn't mean texting 50 times a day and throwing yourself at him....but you need to learn to *give* a little too. As I said earlier, a relationship is not all about you, and your needs, and him fullfilling those needs. He has needs too...and one of those needs is knowing the woman he has been pursuing gives a crap. You seem to care more about partying than you care about him. That's what your actions indicate, and my guess is that is what he is thinking too... 1
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