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Posted

I was sitting with my girlfriend on the train yesterday (we live in nyc) in the corner seats with her sitting in the very corner. There's a window right next to us where you can see into the next train car.

 

My gf went quiet for maybe about 15 seconds. I looked at her and noticed that she was turned, staring into the next train car. I looked to see what was so interesting. On the other side of the window was a 40-something years old guy staring back (we're in our 20's). He was right next to the window, so he's pretty much all you could see.

 

So my immediate reaction was to ask, "Why is this guy staring at you??" (I said this before it hit me that he was what she was looking at. So she immediately turns away from him, back toward me and puts her head on my shoulder. I'm a little shocked at this point.

 

Maybe a minute or two later, she turns her entire body in his direction and wants me to put my arms around her. But I tell her not to turn toward this guy because he's staring at her.

 

What is going on here? And should I let this go?

Posted

Previous boyfriend? She seems to have wanted him to see her in your arms.

 

When you say let this go, do you mean this one incident, or the whole relationship?

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Posted
Previous boyfriend? She seems to have wanted him to see her in your arms.

 

When you say let this go, do you mean this one incident, or the whole relationship?

 

Just this incident.

 

I don't think it was a previous boyfriend. It seems like she was playing some game with him or something. She seemed a little embarrassed when I caught her and then it was like she was suddenly trying to flaunt me. What do you think?

Posted

I think you are thinking too much. Though I am sure I will be in the minority.

 

Sometimes I zone out, and it looks like I am staring when I'm not really looking at anything. A mean girl in my high school lunchroom almost beat me up once because she said I was staring. I was just zoned out - didn't even know where I was looking.

 

As for the turning and wanting you to hold her, I do not know what she was thinking, and neither does anyone else (though I am sure plenty of people wouldn't mind speculating).

 

If you really need some resolution, just ask her.

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Posted
I think you are thinking too much. Though I am sure I will be in the minority.

 

Sometimes I zone out, and it looks like I am staring when I'm not really looking at anything. A mean girl in my high school lunchroom almost beat me up once because she said I was staring. I was just zoned out - didn't even know where I was looking.

 

As for the turning and wanting you to hold her, I do not know what she was thinking, and neither does anyone else (though I am sure plenty of people wouldn't mind speculating).

 

If you really need some resolution, just ask her.

 

But if she was zoning, why would she turn her head all the way and look through a window where she could ONLY see this guy... while he turns and stares back?

Posted

Even if she was staring, it could have been anything. Maybe he looked like her dad or an ex or an old friend or someone else. Just because she was staring doesn't mean she was lusting after him or anything.

 

I would just let it go and not worry about it.

  • Like 4
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Posted
Even if she was staring, it could have been anything. Maybe he looked like her dad or an ex or an old friend or someone else. Just because she was staring doesn't mean she was lusting after him or anything.

 

I would just let it go and not worry about it.

 

Yeah, you're right. It's probably nothing. I'll let it go.

Posted

Never forget the old rule 'you can look but don't touch'

 

Definitely not worth worrying about.

  • Like 1
Posted

If it becomes a pattern its worth bringing up. One time incident? Let it go.

Posted

Staring contest? Maybe she was creeped out by the guy, and she wanted to make sure he sees that she's with a man so he does not try anything like following her. I don't know, it's NYC, I used to live there, anything can happen.

Posted

It's no surprise....she's human!! We ALL LOOK, and don't give me that you don't look at other women :rolleyes:. Oh well she got busted....I'm sure next time she won't be obvious about it. Sorry to break the news but this is normal....get over it. It was just a moment, it wasn't like she's leering at every hot guy that walks by.

 

Reality check: Your GF will find other guys more attractive....such as life.

  • Like 1
Posted
Never forget the old rule 'you can look but don't touch'

 

Definitely not worth worrying about.

 

Or "you can look at the menu, but don't place an order..."

  • Like 1
Posted

I wouldn't dismiss this "incident" so quick. There was a poster recently that started an affair with a stranger she befriended during their commute on a train.

 

Do you often ride the train together?

Posted

99.9% sure she will never see that guy again.

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