Gretzky99 Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 (edited) Does anyone else notice a pattern where you dwell on your ex more towards the end of night than any other time during the day? I had a recent break-up a few months ago. I went NC all the way. I've healed tremendously with the passing of every week. I know that it's completely over but the times where I'm dwelling or thinking about her the most is usually at night; About an hour or so prior to bed time. Maybe it's because I'm home and idle and there's not much is going on but it's always during night when I'm most vulnerable and weak. Do any of you go through the same thing? And is there any suggestion to stop it? Edited September 10, 2015 by Gretzky99 1
thejabberwocky Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 Does anyone else notice a pattern where you dwell on your ex more towards the end of night than any other time during the day? I had a recent break-up a few months ago. I went NC all the way. I've healed tremendously with the passing of every week. I know that it's completely over but the times where I'm dwelling or thinking about her the most is usually at night; About an hour or so prior to bed time. Maybe it's because I'm home and idle and there's not much is going on but it's always during night when I'm most vulnerable and weak. Do any of you go through the same thing? And is there any suggestion to stop it? I'm the same as you! I'm 3 weeks into NC and I've felt really good and strong about my decision to end my toxic relationship, even though it's hard. But suddenly before bedtime I think, "hey, he didn't text me to say goodnight that's weird" and then I remember that he's gone and he will never tell me goodnight again and it's very painful. I think it comes and goes. Tomorrow I'll remember something he did 4 years ago that pissed me off and will feel all strong again. As for helping you through it, I think you should write two lists. One of all the negatives of this person and one of all the reasons your relationship did not work out. Read these when you miss them. It's helped me a lot. I miss him terribly but it's a great comfort when I remind myself that no one is lying to me about their addiction right now. I don't have to worry when he's out with his friends. I don't have to be nervous that he's driving high. I can sleep tonight knowing that I won't discover some horrible secret about my boyfriend tomorrow. These are what's on my list 1
drseuss Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 Mee too , at night and early mornings is when I have felt worst about it all over the past 6 weeks , I think it's because your tired and not occupied , sometimes as well I have woken up in the night and had horrible thoughts about it and then the next day I think why did I feel so down ...... 1
Author Gretzky99 Posted September 10, 2015 Author Posted September 10, 2015 Mee too , at night and early mornings is when I have felt worst about it all over the past 6 weeks , I think it's because your tired and not occupied , sometimes as well I have woken up in the night and had horrible thoughts about it and then the next day I think why did I feel so down ...... Wow, that's exactly how I get too!! It's the absolute worst!!! It's like during the day even though you have thoughts about them, they don't run wild because your focused on either work, school, gym, family, errands etc. But at night and sometimes even early morning when you're tired or idle, it hits hard.
EO422 Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 Yes especially since ma and ex would fall asleep on the phone every night. Made it that much harder when we broke up.
Seth0194 Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 Does anyone else notice a pattern where you dwell on your ex more towards the end of night than any other time during the day? I had a recent break-up a few months ago. I went NC all the way. I've healed tremendously with the passing of every week. I know that it's completely over but the times where I'm dwelling or thinking about her the most is usually at night; About an hour or so prior to bed time. Maybe it's because I'm home and idle and there's not much is going on but it's always during night when I'm most vulnerable and weak. Do any of you go through the same thing? And is there any suggestion to stop it? Yes at night is the only real time I really miss her, just like you said, laying in bed, watching tv it all comes flooding in and it hurts the most. As for the list, it wont work, I did that and it was lopsided (meaning there was many more reasons to be together then not) but sometimes people change and want different things. Just last night, I laid down to sleep and as I was drifting off, I woke up feeling so bad, missing her rolled over and looked next to me, feeling like I had woken up from a bad dream but it was all to real. It took me almost an hour to go back to sleep. Yes night time is the worse.
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