WiselyNaive Posted September 9, 2015 Posted September 9, 2015 well this is new...:sick::sick::sick::sick::sick::sick: I don't know if my memory is blurry but I can't recall ever feeling like this after a break up before. I was the one who got dumped & since then i've been heartbroken & I've wanted my ex back but out of the blue I have began feeling an intense disgust & replusion towards my ex. I cant discern if its just cognitive dissonance at play...I was the one rejected & i now know for a fact my ex has 0 feelings for me (he told me) perhaps this new found disgust is just my brains way of protecting me from the rejection? Or perhaps I am so disgusted with myself for the begging I did at the end that I have projected it on to him? i really lost my dignity throughout this break up & i think i'm either pickin up on how he probably feels about me or just associating him with how i feel about my own actions it came about because i was just so angry with him for how he treated me & then i realized he will never see it my way or feel bad about it, i realized he will probably never feel badly about what he has done & that thought repulses me. the thought of him just makes me feel gross...i just dont wanna think or feel or see him, nothing. i think this is odd since i am the dumpee...i really think its a new point for me & helping me with NC...but has anyone felt this as the dumpee? Eminem-Puke has whole new meaning now.
Acacia98 Posted September 9, 2015 Posted September 9, 2015 Your reaction is normal and appropriate. I don't know if he was particularly callous/cruel. But he did hurt you. And when someone/something hurts you, it is normal to feel repelled by the person/thing because you do not want to put yourself in the position of being hurt again. Think about it: if using an appliance gave you an electric shock, you would stay far away from the said appliance, right? If eating a certain dish made you puke, you would feel disgusted the next time you saw it, right? Well, it's the same thing with people who hurt you. If you feel disgusted when you see the person, then you know to stay away from the person. And right now, when you're feeling vulnerable and need time to heal, that's the right thing to do. So don't feel apologetic or embarrassed or anything like that. You're human; you have the right to feel hurt and to process your hurt, even if that means feeling disgusted at the one who hurt you. 1
NewLeaf512 Posted September 9, 2015 Posted September 9, 2015 well this is new...:sick::sick::sick::sick::sick::sick: I don't know if my memory is blurry but I can't recall ever feeling like this after a break up before. I was the one who got dumped & since then i've been heartbroken & I've wanted my ex back but out of the blue I have began feeling an intense disgust & replusion towards my ex. I cant discern if its just cognitive dissonance at play...I was the one rejected & i now know for a fact my ex has 0 feelings for me (he told me) perhaps this new found disgust is just my brains way of protecting me from the rejection? Or perhaps I am so disgusted with myself for the begging I did at the end that I have projected it on to him? i really lost my dignity throughout this break up & i think i'm either pickin up on how he probably feels about me or just associating him with how i feel about my own actions it came about because i was just so angry with him for how he treated me & then i realized he will never see it my way or feel bad about it, i realized he will probably never feel badly about what he has done & that thought repulses me. the thought of him just makes me feel gross...i just dont wanna think or feel or see him, nothing. i think this is odd since i am the dumpee...i really think its a new point for me & helping me with NC...but has anyone felt this as the dumpee? Eminem-Puke has whole new meaning now. I long to get to this mind set
15Love Posted September 9, 2015 Posted September 9, 2015 (edited) How long have you been NC? I have felt this way twice before. It's a great feeling while it lasts. Helps you get some time accrued in you NC efforts. Unfortunately though a contact high can manifest itself this way. It seems like you just spoke with him about the breakup ...yesterday? Anyway, hang on to its coat tail a for as long as you can. Prepare yourself for what you'll do when you want to reach out to him again. You need to be no contact with this guy. He's treated you horribly. He cheated on you and now is making excuses so you're not the one leaving him. He's either still cheating or he just wanted to be the dumper. Either way cut him out of your life like cancer. Good luck!! Edited September 9, 2015 by 15Love
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