accident_prone Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 so i've (27) been with my girlfriend (21) for about 4 months and have known her for a year. she's an awesome girl. i love her but she's constantly struggling financially. it doesn't necessarily affect us negatively, as things are pretty much always great between us, but it does bum me out to see her dealing with this stuff. it really always seems to be something. it's like she pissed off a gypsy or something. aside from living on her own, working 6 days a week and living check to check, which many people do, she's got car troubles here and there, then it's problems with her apartment complex, her clothes getting ruined, then sometimes it's her helping her mom out and then just today she found out that her identity was stolen a few years back and a bunch of stuff has been messed up with her credit, etc. so mostly when we go out, i pay. i dont mind at all. i am a bit more financially stable and i enjoy doing things for her but i'm certainly not a doormat. so my issue is this: currently she is trying to move from her god-awful shady apartment complex. she's moving into a lease a friend is leaving and the friend said there wouldnt be extra costs (deposit, etc) up front but we just found out there will. this is at the exact same time as my vacation which falls around her bday we were planning. shes stressing about all of these things big time. i could very easily pay for this stuff and relieve this stress and it not bother me a bit, but somehow i know it just isnt the right thing to do. but everything in me wants to help her out cause she really is a great girl and deserves a better hand than the one life has dealt her latlely. anyone with advice or similar experience? it is greatly appreciated in advance!
xcupid Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 Don't do it. If you do you'll be kissing your money goodbye. And don't expect by paying that it will help or strengthen your relationship - because it won't.
kassy Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 Agree, 4 months into a relationship with someone so young you can be there to support them, but IMO they need to work out how to be a functioning adult on their own.
LilaMarie Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 A guy has never, ever helped me financially. Very proud to say that. Very lucky and blessed. I don't think I could accept financial help, unless I were engaged to the guy. Sorry, no advice here. 1
Recommended Posts