rjhill005 Posted September 7, 2015 Posted September 7, 2015 Hey guys, First ever post on anything like this but i feel like for me this will help maybe. My girlfriend just left me a couple days ago and was kinda blind sided by it so it hit me hard. I knew every little flaw and detail about her. We only dated for 10 months and she is a few years younger than me. (Im 24 shes 21). A bunch of my friends are now starting to get rings and moving into their own houses. We got into an argument a few days prior to break up where i was being self conscious and took it out on her cuz i couldnt understand that she actually loved me for me and not how i looked. She then proceeded to say that She doesnt think she makes me happy and that she is a burden and i deserve someone who will buy me things and that I dont deserve her baggage and blah blah. None of which is true because She has done plenty for me and I accept everything about her. She sent me a text with all of this and said because she loves me so much this is why I need to let you go. So you can live a burden free life. She started acting funny three weeks ago when all my frinds were proposing and what not. So i guess what im wondering is if I let this break up happen and have no contact would she come back and realize she is worth it? Do you think she is scared and intimidated of all the ring talk? Granted I wasnt going to propose until it was our third year. Just looking for some answers to help ease the pain i guess
casey.lives Posted September 7, 2015 Posted September 7, 2015 24 and 21 is young. give it more time. you'll be different at 27. At 27 ...33 - 100 (together for eternity)
drseuss Posted September 7, 2015 Posted September 7, 2015 What she is saying makes no sense and is actually very contradictory, no human breaks up with them because they love them too much The more likely thing is she has broken up with you this way because she doesn't want to hurt you anymore than she has to so by saying that you won't feel so bad If reconile is something you want, time and space will be the most important thing you can do right now , but ultimately it falls down to if she wants you back as she is the dumper , try to stay in a posative mindset and don't put all of your focus on getting her back , focus on doing what you want and trying to move on 3
dumbass2 Posted September 7, 2015 Posted September 7, 2015 I agree with the above and that her coming off like she did probably means that she does like you and doesn't want to hurt you because you have been good to her. It's like the old "it's not you, it's me" line. If she really loved you and wanted to be with you, she would not have taken the chance of letting you go. You try talking one last time if you want with absolutely no begging or pleading or neediness, but NC is not meant to bring someone crawling back. It can have the adverse effect, so though I would give yourself some time apart, just know that she may or may not contact you again. there is no guarantee, so don't have any regrets. Live and learn is the best way at your age.
Trishern Posted September 7, 2015 Posted September 7, 2015 She might have done something you would not approve of, or she may have feelings for someone else that she feels bad about. She could be confused by her feelings and doesn't want to mess you around. You guys are young and there's a lot of living to be done. Mrs T
Tobin Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 . At 27 ...33 - 100 (together for eternity) Not quite getting the math here.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 "Baggage" may be the key word. This could easily be a woman whose distant past has rendered her the sort of person who expects to be mistreated by men to an extreme which most who post on this board would never even conceive. And thus, she might not be someone who can even be truly comfortable or content without the chaos to which she is accustomed. This would all be very normal were it the case, even though it clearly sounds upside down to (the nice guys). So depending upon the "baggage" she has, (and to some extent, whether she has told you everything)... she just may not feel (threatened, really) enough by you...
ExpatInItaly Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 First of all, 24 is extremely young to be buying rings and proposing. 21 even more so. So don't even worry about that. You have all the time in the world to be out meeting women before you think about settling down. Second of all, she didn't break up with you because you're too good. Not buying that, but she obviously knows she doesn't feel the same way you do. She did the right thing by letting you go. Finally, what do you mean you couldn't believe she loved you for you? Why do you think she loved you? I don't get what you meant by that. You think your looks blew her away or something? If she felt she couldn't make you happy, then you need to work on yourself before you start dating again.
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