jam.over.jelly Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 (edited) I'm so very torn. So my roommate's gf broke up with him about a month ago. They were together for 9 years. I'm not exactly friends with either of them, he is my roommate and I occasionally hung out with her when she was over the house. So this is my dilemma: the last time she was over was to move her stuff out, her pictures, everything. She decided they would no longer work out. SHe told me that she broke up with him because she found somebody else. And the guy said he wanted to move in together to help take care of her after she got her knee surgery. I was dumbfounded. But I didn't say anything, not to anybody. Today, a month later, she showed up again, and last night I heard them having sex. She left him a note on the fridge saying how much she still loves him blah blah. I guess things didn't work out with the new guy and now she came back. The thing is I have seen how devastated my roommate was and still is when she broke up with him. I cannot stand the way she treats him, yet I dont know what to do. I feel like it really isn't my business to say anything, but my conscience tells me otherwise. HELP!!! Edited September 3, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs and move to Friendship forum.
Redhead14 Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 (edited) Stay out of it. It is not your place to intervene. He knows who he is dealing with. He's an adult. Edited September 3, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact full quote of immediately preceding post 5
Author jam.over.jelly Posted September 3, 2015 Author Posted September 3, 2015 You're right, I thought so. I guess I just need validation. 2
Toodaloo Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 I feel like it really isn't my business to say anything, It isn't your business. Let them deal with their own affairs. 1
Gary S Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 Maybe she realized the error of her ways and now they will live happily ever after? You really don't know. You have to let people live their own lives. 1
DrReplyInRhymes Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 I'd have to agree, if you aren't even really friends with your own roommate, It's probably best to keep quiet as it's his own life and fate, However, if you DO consider yourself a real friend of his, then I'd take it my own hands, I'd have a real talk with him and the games some women can play, and hope he understands.
angel.eyes Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 Stay out of it. You don't really know the details. 1
Author jam.over.jelly Posted September 3, 2015 Author Posted September 3, 2015 I hate the fact that she told me everything. How she slept with other guys (he doesn't know about this either), but because he's the one keep taking her back time after time she knows she can always come back. I feel like the moment she finds another better guy, she's gonna dump him again, and again. And the note she wrote to him on the fridge made me stick to my stomach. 1
pteromom Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 I hate the fact that she told me everything. How she slept with other guys (he doesn't know about this either), but because he's the one keep taking her back time after time she knows she can always come back. I feel like the moment she finds another better guy, she's gonna dump him again, and again. And the note she wrote to him on the fridge made me stick to my stomach. If it is eating at you knowing this stuff, go to HER, and say "Do you remember all that stuff you told me when you were moving out? You really need to tell all that to him if he doesn't know." Of course, it is also possible she told you all that specifically so you would pass it on to him, in order to hurt him, and none of it is true at all. 1
Author jam.over.jelly Posted September 3, 2015 Author Posted September 3, 2015 If it is eating at you knowing this stuff, go to HER, and say "Do you remember all that stuff you told me when you were moving out? You really need to tell all that to him if he doesn't know." Of course, it is also possible she told you all that specifically so you would pass it on to him, in order to hurt him, and none of it is true at all. She even showed me some text messages from one of the guys , so I'm pretty sure she's not faking it. Ugh!
Satu Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 Never volunteer to referee the game. Everybody hates the referee. 1
angel.eyes Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 (edited) You said you aren't really friends with her...or your roommate (i.e. her BF/ex-BF). So why exactly is she suddenly sharing her melodrama with you? They have a nine-year history of breaking up and getting back together. By your own admission, you're friends with neither one of them. Again, you don't really know the details. Edited September 3, 2015 by angel.eyes 2
Author jam.over.jelly Posted September 3, 2015 Author Posted September 3, 2015 You said you aren't really friends with her...or your roommate (I.e. her BF/ex-BF). So why exactly is she suddenly sharing her melodrama with you? They have a nine-year history of breaking up and getting back together. By your own admission, you're friends with neither one of them. Again, you don't really know the details. We hang out casually but i never consider her my friend because I don't trust her at all.
Satu Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 We hang out casually but i never consider her my friend because *I don't trust her at all. Why hang out with someone you don't trust?
angel.eyes Posted September 3, 2015 Posted September 3, 2015 "Occasional" casual hangouts, to use your original description. If you feel like enmeshing yourself in their lives now, by all means, knock yourself out! Typically the only person scorched in these situations is YOU. They continue on until the next victim gets suckered into their business.
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