opalant Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 I was with him for 3 years and 3 months, he left me 3 months ago and gave me a black eye. I've been on Tinder for the last month just as a laugh really for when I'm bored but today I came across my ex, I swiped no straight away but he must have seen me as well because he messaged and told me to swipe yes for him. I said no and he kept trying to carry on the conversation. I was so upset when I saw it, knowing that he's going to be getting with other girls, made me feel sick. I just feel numb now, and I ignored his messages to which he called me a n*b and then he finally stopped trying to contact me. I don't know what to do or how to cope with this??
Gus Grimly Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 I don't know what to do or how to cope with this?? Cope with what? Your Ex on Tinder or the Break up or the fact he physically abused you?
Author opalant Posted September 2, 2015 Author Posted September 2, 2015 I've coped with him hitting me, it made it easier for me to hate him and want to move on after the break up. I know him being on Tinder probably isn't such a big thing but it was a huge shock, I didn't expect to ever find him on there and then BAM! I definitely don't want him back, I don't even really miss him anymore I just feel like seeing him moving on clearly talking to other girls has really set me back in my healing process so now I don't know what to do to get back on track?
drseuss Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 You can't be upset that he is on tinder when you are aswell , his intention on there is probaly the same as yours , the thought of an ex getting woth some else is an absolute stomach flipper but sadly it's the reality of a break up your both free and single I went on tinder when my ex left me ( I'm a male ) but didn't have intentions of sex , i guess getting matches and stuff just makes you feel better and helps you realise there are other girls out there , and the while time I wanted my ex back , thank god in don't now but it took several weeks to get ton that point
Gus Grimly Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 I know him being on Tinder probably isn't such a big thing but it was a huge shock, I didn't expect to ever find him on there and then BAM! Look, it's gonna happen. Most humans are looking for love and companionship, this need is embedded in our DNA. My Fiance broke off our engagement. 2 weeks later I found her profile on the 3 main dating sites and Tinder. Did it hurt? Yes? Did it sting to see the pics she put up were the one's I took of her during the best moments of the relationship? Of course. How about the fact that in all 3 profiles, her perfect match described me to a T. Did that upset me? Sure it did. It's okay to feel this way. All you can do is try to avoid this stuff. You need to heal. You're not over your Ex so seeing him seeking out women is gonna sting, and it will sting until you feel indifference about your past with him. You gotta try to commit to no contact, that includes Tinder and dating sites. Just until you're ready to move on. Posting here will help you as well. So keep coming back. 2
Author opalant Posted September 2, 2015 Author Posted September 2, 2015 thanks both of you yeah i know I shouldn't be upset because I'm on it too but it doesn't stop it from hurting because he was my first love, and because he hit me I feel like he doesn't deserve to be happy when I'm still not 100% over it :/ I'm going to stick to strict no contact from now on though, he's always the one to message me and I always ignore them, if he tries again I'll have to block him, I'm just confused as to why he kept asking me to like him back on tinder and mithering me to reply to him when he left me, it just doesn't make sense I know he's probably just doing it for his ego, to get some attention from me, but I haven't given it too him
quattrob Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 Things dont need to make sense and its not worth wasting your time and energy on him anymore. Stop thinking things like "he shouldnt be happy until you're 100% moved on" that is stupid thinking, it will hold you back. Dont focus on what he does or doesnt do anymore. Focus on other things like yourself, your family and friends, people who care and love you and you trust. 1
pidgeon1010 Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 I'm just confused as to why he kept asking me to like him back on tinder and mithering me to reply to him when he left me, it just doesn't make sense He is a psychopath. He is obviously not exhibiting any guilt for his cowardly actions and had the audacity to contact you. He is a physical and emotional/mental abuser who delights in tormenting and antagonizing his ex on social media. He sounds like a real winner! I feel sorry for his next victim. BLOCK HIM. 2
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