ConfusedInOC Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 1. We live in a continuous flow of transition and transformation, for there are no endings there are only new beginnings. 2. To deny the honest _expression of our emotions is to choose a half life. 3. My friend, you belong to your dreams, you belong to you ~ not to someone else's expectations of you. 4. When you make another person your path, you get led astray. Follow your own star!
outdated Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC 1. We live in a continuous flow of transition and transformation, for there are no endings there are only new beginnings. 2. To deny the honest _expression of our emotions is to choose a half life. 3. My friend, you belong to your dreams, you belong to you ~ not to someone else's expectations of you. 4. When you make another person your path, you get led astray. Follow your own star! AMEN BROTHER, AMEN
outdated Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Another confidence builder COC- in the two seconds I stepped away from the LS to grab a glass of water I met a beautiful girl right outside my door. Rebecca. WHo woulda thunk it. They're everywhere my friend, it's time to start looking at them.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 12, 2005 Author Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by outdated Another confidence builder COC- in the two seconds I stepped away from the LS to grab a glass of water I met a beautiful girl right outside my door. Rebecca. WHo woulda thunk it. They're everywhere my friend, it's time to start looking at them. ACK!! That's my Ex's name (though she spells is Rebekah)
outdated Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC ACK!! That's my Ex's name (though she spells is Rebekah) Sorry....
greenhorn Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC 3. My friend, you belong to your dreams, you belong to you ~ not to someone else's expectations of you. 4. When you make another person your path, you get led astray. Follow your own star! Pretty much valid points. Actually when you are dumped for someone else, your esteem and confidence gets down to the shadow of what was before,so you got to realise that what you are is what you should be. Good work CIOC
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 12, 2005 Author Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by greenhorn Pretty much valid points. Actually when you are dumped for someone else, your esteem and confidence gets down to the shadow of what was before,so you got to realise that what you are is what you should be. Good work CIOC The hard part is regaining your sense of esteem and self worth after being dumped for someone else. I know there is no easy way for that to happen. I know I have to get out, date, socialize and just be me again. But the problem is this cloud is really hanging over my head.... I hate the way I feel right now. I am not worthless. I am not defined by her. I am a strong man. I am not weak willed or spineless. I am not needy or clingy. I just fell deeply in love with someone who wasn't ready, willing or wanting of my love.
outdated Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC The hard part is regaining your sense of esteem and self worth after being dumped for someone else. I know there is no easy way for that to happen. I know I have to get out, date, socialize and just be me again. But the problem is this cloud is really hanging over my head.... I hate the way I feel right now. I am not worthless. I am not defined by her. I am a strong man. I am not weak willed or spineless. I am not needy or clingy. I just fell deeply in love with someone who wasn't ready, willing or wanting of my love. FEEL THE LOVE BROTHER. IT's EVERYWHERE.
Illusion24 Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 I am not worthless. I am not defined by her. I am a strong man. I am not weak willed or spineless. I am not needy or clingy. I just fell deeply in love with someone who wasn't ready, willing or wanting of my love. Well hello what do we have here...MR. Confident himself...
sunshinegirl Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 The hard part is regaining your sense of esteem and self worth after being dumped for someone else. I know there is no easy way for that to happen. I know I have to get out, date, socialize and just be me again. But the problem is this cloud is really hanging over my head.... I hate the way I feel right now. I am not worthless. I am not defined by her. I am a strong man. I am not weak willed or spineless. I am not needy or clingy. I just fell deeply in love with someone who wasn't ready, willing or wanting of my love. *sigh* This is exactly how I feel. HUGE cloud hanging over my head...hate how I feel. Get nothing done at work b/c I'm on these boards all day long obsessing and letting the cloud get heavier and thicker. The slam to your self-esteem is a really shocking thing to experience. I was happy, confident, with goals, interests, opinions, hobbies when I met my ex. All of that has gone out the window now. I'm almost dangerously underweight (thanks, break-up diet!) and can barely get out of bed in the morning. I don't recognize me anymore. It's a long, slow road to do the internal repairs...especially hard when you think about the fact that your ex is experiencing none of this s***. Grrr!
greenhorn Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC The hard part is regaining your sense of esteem and self worth after being dumped for someone else. Yes this the crux, the only way to regain sense of esteem and self worth is to taste sucess, Man I tell you nothing suceeds like sucess. So how to get this sucess? I am not a great votary of love and all those bull s*** so what you should try is to get sucess professionally. There you would be judged on your merit not on whims and fancies of some selfish creature. If you are in one project, get one more project same time, do some thing to achieve sucess( something means in professional life).I have registered myself for 2 exams on same day, gonna be tough and I may fail and lose lots of money but that is my way to to give myself sense of sucess, if I pass it would be great. So do stuff like this. Well there are ways like dating , socializing and falling in love again , but I don't vouch for them.
greenhorn Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Well fogot to add one more thing, Once you have lost your esteem and self worth, then don't try to get it at the mercy of others. Like if someone else loves me then I will get my esteem, screw it man, get it on your own feet. Then once you are back on your esteem and self worth , go out and play the game and this time you make the rules!
IhavenoFREAKINclue Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Deep s*** COC....Very moving and inspirational..... Does this friend of yours who gave you such nice words going through something tough? Or is he here for you? If so.....very good friend!
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 12, 2005 Author Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by IhavenoFREAKINclue Deep s*** COC....Very moving and inspirational..... Does this friend of yours who gave you such nice words going through something tough? Or is he here for you? If so.....very good friend! Yeah she went through something similar about four years ago and she started compiling words of encouragement to help her through. I'm trying to keep a smile on my face and build my confidence back up. I really am. I just can't get her out of my mind. Stupid me....breaking the NC rule was a no no...and I was doing soooo good. Oh well. Started again this week. Let's see how long I can go this time. I guess I can make a game of it.
outdated Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Yeah she went through something similar about four years ago and she started compiling words of encouragement to help her through. I'm trying to keep a smile on my face and build my confidence back up. I really am. I just can't get her out of my mind. Stupid me....breaking the NC rule was a no no...and I was doing soooo good. Oh well. Started again this week. Let's see how long I can go this time. I guess I can make a game of it. You broke it because you felt you had to. You'll be surprised how quickly you rebound this time because she has confirmed your greatest fear and ray of hope- that's she's a f***ing bitch. It doesn't take long to recover from the truth.
dgiirl Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by greenhorn Once you have lost your esteem and self worth, then don't try to get it at the mercy of others. Like if someone else loves me then I will get my esteem, screw it man, get it on your own feet. Then once you are back on your esteem and self worth , go out and play the game and this time you make the rules! That's exactly how I'm going to play it. I'm not ready, nor do I want a romantic relationship. I need to get my own self esteem and worth back. Once I have that, relationships will just happen. And the rules will definitely be different the next time
whirlwindlove Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Hi there people, Somehow it brings a smile to my face, when you know people are going through your same emotions. We all go through the the same mini battles time from time. "I know what it feels like to try to put on a brave smile, when I should be working, I somehow wander to LS messaging all day, searching for answers I don't know" Or knowing the battle with NC, and having to start over every three days. LOL All you can do, when you feel like you have lost your self-esteem, because your behavior over loving someone- has brought you to new levels of "I can't believe I just did that"( Usually texting or calling remorse) I tell you what, I rather get out and feel I have put my best foot forward, and did not leave anything on the table. I hate what ifs.
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