Author Goodbye Posted September 2, 2015 Author Posted September 2, 2015 Well, you at least now know what you don't want A break would be a good thing. Get yourself centered and focused on your needs and do things for yourself that make you happy. When you do that, it will be so much easier when you do date. A man should only enhance the happiness she already has for/with herself, not bring all of it to her. You're an awesome, strong woman. Rest on that fact for a while. Yes. When I'm in a relationship I feel like I really need/want one...even if it isn't the one I'm in at the moment. Same thing with sex. If I'm solo for a while, my "need" for a relationship goes down as does my desire for sex, which frankly is a relief. 1
Lois_Griffin Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 No. He doesn't see a therapist. He should though. Suggested it many times. He wanted me to check his insurance and find someone in his network. I will...because well, he should be evaluated. But, I also have 3 kids and a flock of pets I need to care for. Not sure I can take on another dependent. Jesus. Do you have to chew this loser's food for him, too? Lucky you. A moocher who has zero ambition to do anything but let you take him out on dates and pay for him, let you manage his pitiful life, and let you provide everything for him. Please make me understand why you disrespect yourself to this level because I just can't wrap my brain around it. 2
Lois_Griffin Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 Thank you. That is the thing. I'd tell him to get his snoring ass home (to his parent's home...yup) but I care for him. This has gone from pathetic to downright pitiful. I guess you've become this loser's foster mother. Gag.
Diezel Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 Cautionary tales are all over Dead Bedrooms on Reddit. Trust me, dump him now. 1
Redhead14 Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 But, I also have 3 kids and a flock of pets I need to care for -- Your primary priorities/obligations are to YOU and your children. Nothing and no one should ever intrude on, take away from or otherwise interfere with those things on any level -- financially or emotionally. If you are emotionally drained because of another person, that person is taking something away from your children. That other person is gone and non-negotiable. 3
Billybob23 Posted September 2, 2015 Posted September 2, 2015 Yes. I just need to take a hiatus from the divorcee dating scene and really figure out what it is (if anything) I'm looking for in a relationship. Probably the best, I don't think he really cares about you, going out just gives him something to do probably. It's not fun being used.
phineas Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 Loser, not looser. They're not their. If you want me to put a cork in it, don't read my thread. Thanks. When the only response one can formulate on a forum is that of spelling and grammar mistakes made by someone posting on their tablet while they take a crap it means you have no response. At all and just don't want to face the truth. Good luck. I promise I'll care even less when you post back again in a few months to continue to whine about this guy.
Tobin Posted September 8, 2015 Posted September 8, 2015 OP sounds like a horrible person in this thread. She's in a relationship and "loves" a guy who she trashes behind his back: 1. no ambition 2. low sex drive 3. easy job 4. just blah 5. he snores 6. in HER bed (oh no!) 7. Broke -----> But wait, there's more 8. he lives with his parents 9. he's a pet 10. drinks too much coffee 11. doesn't exercise -----> hold on not finished yet 12. doesn't eat healthy 13. is a 50 y/o man child 14. really into his phone 15. and his tablet 16. needs a therapist 17. deserved his divorce 18. can't get his act together :love:I can only hope to fall in love with a woman who thinks this way about me. Most of those are facts, not her opinion of him. It sounds bad because well, it IS bad.
chapter44 Posted October 8, 2015 Posted October 8, 2015 Ok, now I'm just venting. I should be done with this guy, but I guess part of me is lonely and a little desperate, part of me really loves him. He isn't right for me. He isn't ambitious and he has a low sex drive. I FINALLY have my house to myself tonight. My kids rarely go to their dads. I took bf out for a nice dinner, go to the bathroom to brush my teeth, come out and he is snoring on my bed. Seriously, am I that boring? No...his job isn't challenging, he isn't exhausted, he wasn't drinking...he is just blah. Sex isn't important to him and it is to me. So I didn't feel like laying there listening to his snoring in MY cozy bed...sleeping in the freaking guest room on my one night away from my kids. This sucks. Note to self: get some self esteem and find someone new. Why do I love him? Because he is very sweet and kind and has been through a lot of the same **** in a horrid divorce...feel like we are both survivors in a way...kindred spirits. but that isn't enough to keep us together for me. Plus I pay for everything as he is broke, and that just isn't romantic for me. Maybe if it was just one thing...but taking him out to dinner only to have him snoozing away at 8:30 pm...f-that. I'm too emotionally worn out to even deal with it. I will break up with him soon. But for tonight, I sleep alone. Sucks. I see several things in your post that give me pause: 1. I took him out for a nice dinner - why is he not taking you out? 2. He isn't the right guy for me - you already know that 3. He is sleeping instead of ravishing you on a night when the kids are gone - enough said! 4. Note to self Get some self esteem - do you feel this is a ongoing issue with you? 5. Sweet and kind are good qualities but so is being a man. Sorry to be blunt but you already know this is doomed 1
MrBojangles Posted October 8, 2015 Posted October 8, 2015 I see several things in your post that give me pause: 1. I took him out for a nice dinner - why is he not taking you out? 2. He isn't the right guy for me - you already know that 3. He is sleeping instead of ravishing you on a night when the kids are gone - enough said! 4. Note to self Get some self esteem - do you feel this is a ongoing issue with you? 5. Sweet and kind are good qualities but so is being a man. Sorry to be blunt but you already know this is doomed and 6. The OP already broke up with this guy about a month ago. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/546651-well-i-did-i-broke-off-sad 1
Author Goodbye Posted October 8, 2015 Author Posted October 8, 2015 I see several things in your post that give me pause: 1. I took him out for a nice dinner - why is he not taking you out? 2. He isn't the right guy for me - you already know that 3. He is sleeping instead of ravishing you on a night when the kids are gone - enough said! 4. Note to self Get some self esteem - do you feel this is a ongoing issue with you? 5. Sweet and kind are good qualities but so is being a man. Sorry to be blunt but you already know this is doomed Yes! It is so doomed it ended a month and a half ago! Emotions are complex. I read over what I wrote in August and I'm surprised. Put it down on paper and it sounds like crap. Strange thing is, I still miss him. I'll move on eventually...just still mulling over things.
Gaeta Posted October 8, 2015 Posted October 8, 2015 Yes! It is so doomed it ended a month and a half ago! Emotions are complex. I read over what I wrote in August and I'm surprised. Put it down on paper and it sounds like crap. Strange thing is, I still miss him. I'll move on eventually...just still mulling over things. Congratulations!! Now your life has room for a new amazing man when you're ready. Missing him only means you got used to him. Your feeling the change of habit and routine, it will pass. 1
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