How soon after you start dating is it 'normal' to go away for a weekend together?

[edgygirl]

Now that I read you are a virgin... no, no way. Don't commit to traveling with him until you know how you feel about the relationship. It doesn't look like you know at this point.

 

Doing it for the first time on a trip... with a guy you haven't even decided yet if you're really into... it's way too early specially because you probably have to decide now whether you're going on this trip, after dating for only a few weeks.

 

IMO if you are a virgin . . . 2-3 months in is Waaaaayyyyyy too soon for you to be talking about sex let alone having it. If you go away together sex is on the table as you know.

 

If you are ambivalent or conflicted, you have waited this long to lose your virginity, use the logistical issues as a buffer. Skip this trip. Keep dating him. Eventually if you are not prepared to have sex with him you will need to talk to him about your status otherwise he's going to think it's him & that you are rejecting him.

 

Some guys will be OK. Some guys will be jerks.

 

Whatever you decide make sure it's the right decision for YOU.

[the_entertainer1]

I saw him last night - he got back from his current business trip at 5pm and met me at around 7 at a carnival that was on in our town. I was impressed, because if I were in his position, I'd be far too tired for socialising after a week working away!

 

We kissed during the fireworks and all that, and then he said that he wanted to send me a FB request to list us as "in a relationship" because he isn't interested in anyone else. He wasn't that articulate, lol, but I said I thought it was really nice and that I didn't want to date anyone else either.

 

Just this evening, he sent me a message, saying that he's not fussed about what I do with the request and doesn't believe it changes anything, but that he wanted to make a gesture to show me he wasn't interested in anyone else. I love the sentiment behind it, but I'm also not that keen to publish everything to Facebook. It's still fairly early days in the relationship. I don't want to date anyone else at the moment either, but I'm still working out exactly how I feel about him. I feel like we're lacking a bit of they sexual energy I have previously experienced (yes, I've never had sex, but you can still have sexual energy with someone). Other than that, everything is just about perfect - and he hasn't brought up the weekend away again.

 

So I guess my next question is - how do I tell him I don't want to publish my relationship status on Facebook? If a guy told me he didn't want to, I'd feel like he was ashamed of me or something.

[No_Go]

I don't think the fact that she's a virgin is a big deal. I was like her (Virgin, 27.5 yo), and the first time was not awkward at all, I was mentally very ready. I think it was ~month after I met the guy and ~week after we officially started dating (I also never kissed a guy before him, haha, you can't get more virgin than that )

 

 

So my point was 2 months in, if they both want it, at 26, sex shouldn't be an issue regardless of their (lack of) experience. It is just part of life.

 

I see it more of an issue that she needs to commit 6 weeks further down the line in a new relationship, and her focus should be whether she wants that or not.

 

 

 

IMO if you are a virgin . . . 2-3 months in is Waaaaayyyyyy too soon for you to be talking about sex let alone having it. If you go away together sex is on the table as you know.

 

If you are ambivalent or conflicted, you have waited this long to lose your virginity, use the logistical issues as a buffer. Skip this trip. Keep dating him. Eventually if you are not prepared to have sex with him you will need to talk to him about your status otherwise he's going to think it's him & that you are rejecting him.

 

Some guys will be OK. Some guys will be jerks.

 

Whatever you decide make sure it's the right decision for YOU.

[TB Rhine]

Any time after you've slept together.