NeverHurtSoMuch Posted August 31, 2015 Posted August 31, 2015 Hey guys, A lot of you know my story. I'm an 18 year old guy who just started college (this was the first day). I had a really bad break up with my high school sweetheart at the end of June. She had been distant for months while I had tried everything to make things like they once were, perfect. Anyway, immediately following the breakup, I was extremely needy and pathetic, so she blocked me on Facebook, blocked my phone number. A couple of weeks ago I tried to message her on snapchat, simply asking her if she wanted to be friends and make it less awkward between us, and she responded with "Please stop messaging me, I have moved on." A couple of days after that, she blocked me on snapchat. So I have no way of seeing her social media, nor can I contact her even if I wanted to. The thing is, I really thought I had essentially moved on before I contacted her the most recent time. But, I guess I just thought that on a surface level, because right now, I'm struggling. Anyway, now both she and I have moved into college, and obviously I know nothing about her experience. I'm generally a very likeable guy, and I've made a couple of friends so far, but it's only day 1. I joke around with and talk to girls and make people laugh, but deep down inside every girl I look at I compare to her, and none of them make the cut. I'm constantly thinking about her, and about how she is probably sleeping with other guys at school, and the thought just kills me inside. I might show that I am cheerful on the outside, but inside I'm really hurting, and I'm not sure what to do about it. To top it off, my high school friends who are currently in college have been partying a lot and posting about it on social media, and my school currently does not have any parties as none of the upperclassmen are on campus. So I just don't know what to do to make myself feel better. I can't get my mind off of her at all, and it really, really sucks. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
jam67 Posted August 31, 2015 Posted August 31, 2015 Dude, keep your head up. You just started the best 4-5 years of your life. Forget this girl. I know it's easier said than done. And I feel your pain. But trust me man, this girl is just gonna be a part of your past soon enough. College is great, I was talking to my buddy today about how much I wish it was move in day of college instead of going to work tomorrow. Live it up man, enjoy your life. You're in probably one of the best experiences and places you'll be in your life. Get out there and Forget that girl. Soon enough the only thing you'll want from her is a hook up over the summer while you're home. Play on playboy. It'll be alright
Author NeverHurtSoMuch Posted August 31, 2015 Author Posted August 31, 2015 Thanks for the response man. People keep saying that to me, and I know it's day one, but I feel like right now I'm being limited by her. Any girl I talk to isn't as good as she was, and I can't help but think about how much fun she is almost definitely having with other guys, she might even be sleeping with them. It sucks, so, so much. I thought I had a future with this girl, and it turns out what we had meant literally nothing to her, and I meant literally nothing to her. It's depressing man
Happines Posted August 31, 2015 Posted August 31, 2015 I understand how u feel but trust me it does get better...it's been 3 months for me and even know I still have some sad days I am feeling so so much better...go out meet people spend time with good friends try to see a therapist...usually universities have a free one and it would help u so so much plus u can't try 5HTP it's without prescription but might help you with the mood read as well some books like mindfulness and try to meditate I don't say it will help straight away because it won't but with time you will get better u will start eating easier sleeping better and will even smile without thinking of her it's hard but sometimes things are not meant to b
LoveIsMyReligion Posted August 31, 2015 Posted August 31, 2015 Hey man, I've been in your exact situation. The only time I actually started getting over my ex completely was when I said, "**** it, I don't care about you anymore". I didn't hate her or like her, she was just another random fish in the ocean. You won't move on until you just accept the fact that she doesn't want you in her life and that you need to do some epic **** to get your dignity back and become an ever better man than you were when you met her. After some time you'll be glad you guys broke up and will look at this as an awesome learning experience where you became an even better man. I know all of this is hard to believe and you still have some grieving to do but you'll get there. Take my info for what it's worth, but I have no reason to lie to you. =P
Author NeverHurtSoMuch Posted August 31, 2015 Author Posted August 31, 2015 It's almost as if I don't want to get over her, because I still want the past when it clearly will never happen again. It's like I can't believe she's out of my life forever, and that I probably will never even talk to her again. Like she was such a big, amazing part of my life for such a long time, and now all of a sudden, she isn't and she doesn't want to be. It hurts like hell, and it's been two months already so I'm starting to wonder if I might genuinely be slipping into depression
Author NeverHurtSoMuch Posted September 1, 2015 Author Posted September 1, 2015 Hey guys, sorry I keep posting on here but it's my only outlet for what I'm feeling and telling you guys really helps me to feel better. I woke up this morning feeling really sad, and for some reason I cannot get out of my head the thought that she is with another guy and having fun with him. It just makes me want to cry. Also, despite the fact that I know I should not and that it only hurts me, I still have hope that she will eventually realize that I was special to her and come back. Do you guys have any advice on how to shake these thoughts?
MINDSHIFT Posted September 1, 2015 Posted September 1, 2015 (edited) I feel ur pain mate. The only thing I can say is your 18 which is very young you will meet someone who wants to be with you (I hate that kind of advice but its true). My break up has been around 2months now, somedays are rough some are not so rough but i can never get that bitch out of my mind. Look at it like this, she dont want you!! why be down about someone who has made a choice (keyword) not to be with you. I know you probably think its your fault if only you did something different but the bottom line is she dont want to know you at the moment for what ever reason. Mosty likely cause she met someone else and is having a good time without you. I personally dont know what stage im on, i dont hurt so much anymore. i was at a stage of moving on then i stupidly stalked her social media activities which made me sad. The worst part is that the cunt (my ex) is worse of with her ex but she cannot see it. it drives me crazy and i also like you stupidly want her to come back, i would reject her but the satisfaction of that would be sweet. The more i think about it the more I wish bad on her and her toxic relationship which isn't healthy for me. There was a stage when I really wanted her to do well but the more i hurt and remember and think about how the break up was done i get so angry. I believe NC is the best thing. Im gonna quit from today looking at her social stuff. Easier said then done but move on. How can we allow our exes to make us feel like this. My ex is probably having the sames laughs and orgasms she had with me with her new boyfriend. Im sure she thinks about me but obviously not enough to make a U turn on her choice. Edited September 1, 2015 by MINDSHIFT
Author NeverHurtSoMuch Posted September 1, 2015 Author Posted September 1, 2015 Yeah, I mean I definitely don't wish ill upon her in any way. She was my first love and someone that I still love, and I probably will always care for her. I genuinely want her to be happy, but I'm still at the point where it makes me really sad to know that she is happy being with other guys and wants to be over me. What's worse is that we go to college very close together, so it's quite possible that I will see her at parties with other guys, and I know that will make me feel awful. I know everyone says it takes time, but for me it seems as though it is taking too much time.
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