Ami1uwant Posted August 28, 2015 Posted August 28, 2015 I have used various forms of meeting people online over 20 yrs. in the early days it was meeting people in chat rooms on AOL or yahoo. On AOL they started a dating site that match bought. After my marriage there was match, eharmony and other sites. Pre 2009 online dating sites had mostly those seriously looking fir relations and many having success. After 2009 the sites started to attract those who weren't as serious about it or looked at it as a way to meet people outside of their ordinary channels. As a result you got more and more who were less serious about. The lack if seriousness Aldo has to do with the concept of never ending matches/grass is greener. There were numerous times people meet through online dating who don't date again but had they met the old fashioned way and there wasn't the online dating they would have developed a relationship. Also now, unlike 10-15 yrs ago is it's just harder to meet people the non online sources in most of the country. What has also played a part in the online dating is the maximizer vs satisfy ear contrast in behavior found in economic behavior in shopping. Maximizer...wants to go to all the stores and see what's available before buying. Satisfy ear only drops till they are satisfied and buys it. Usually the maximizer holds off buying a blouse to go around the mall before she decided she wanted that one. In the meantime, the satisfied buys the blouse the maximizer wanted do when she comes back it's gone. Another economic example.... You see these in stores..they ask you to try something new with free samples. If they had a small sample size like 4-6 customers would buy one and likely repeat buy it. Another has a lot more samples like 24.. It becomes analysis parsley says thus customers can't choose and thus won't buy. This same behavior applies it online dating that makes people behave these ways....of constantly looking and having trouble to decide who to pursue.
Gaeta Posted August 28, 2015 Posted August 28, 2015 My experience and theory is that online has become a big convention for the recently divorced or broken up. These people are not ready to re-invest themselves although they think they are. They are a waste of time for anyone else who's been single for a while and are ready to give a real shot at a relationship. Every day I come across men on there barely out of marriages with 'seeking serious relationship' on their profile. Ridiculous. I would like to meet someone who's been single at least 2 years, I don't know where they hide but it's not online. Yesterday I started talking to this man. I asked him how long he was single and he said 9 months out of a 16 year marriage. I asked what he was looking for and his answered is 'serious relationship'. I said: You mean if you meet a lady and you hit it off pretty good, you will delete your profile after lets say 5-6 dates? He said: well not that kind of serious..........I rest my case
joseb Posted August 28, 2015 Posted August 28, 2015 My experience and theory is that online has become a big convention for the recently divorced or broken up. These people are not ready to re-invest themselves although they think they are. I think you might have something there. It's definitely a pretty high percentage.
Author Ami1uwant Posted August 28, 2015 Author Posted August 28, 2015 My experience and theory is that online has become a big convention for the recently divorced or broken up. These people are not ready to re-invest themselves although they think they are. They are a waste of time for anyone else who's been single for a while and are ready to give a real shot at a relationship. Every day I come across men on there barely out of marriages with 'seeking serious relationship' on their profile. Ridiculous. I would like to meet someone who's been single at least 2 years, I don't know where they hide but it's not online. Yesterday I started talking to this man. I asked him how long he was single and he said 9 months out of a 16 year marriage. I asked what he was looking for and his answered is 'serious relationship'. I said: You mean if you meet a lady and you hit it off pretty good, you will delete your profile after lets say 5-6 dates? He said: well not that kind of serious..........I rest my case Yes you do have people who are recently divorced...those numbers go with the age group. Those around 35-46..many have had been married before. You can say the same thing with women. The hard thing is you can't know if you are ready to date until you date. Are you ready to date after a LTR/divorce ?. It depends on factors like length of marriage, how the relationship ended ( slow drift vs caught cheating/dear john letter), and how difficult the divorce was with kids/assets. The other issue is what someone defines as a serious relationship...one may have a different definition like serious=getting sex. Number of dates isn't a good measure..length of time and time together matters more. You could have 5-6 dates in 10 days and the relationship ends in 3 weeks vs 5-6 dates in 2 months is something different.
Recommended Posts