louisthe15th Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 I started dating a girl 5 month after she got out of a 3 year relationship. We dated 9 months. I broke up with her a few weeks back cause the X contacted her and it bugged me. Prior to the break up she was attempting to put into my head that she was completely over him. A week after we broke up, she slept with him. Now over a month later, I want her back but she tells me this but says she always loved me more, she was lost when she slept with him, mad I broke up with her when she was honest with me, and said there was no emotions behind it. I want to be with her, but I feel like theirs part of the story I'm not getting. Can a female have sex with her long term ex boyfriend and not have any emotions behind it???
ScotchBeef Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 Personaly i'd steer well clear. Sounds like she has deep rooted feelings for this guy, combine that with your obvious trust issues and it's a disaster waiting to happen.
mitchapalooza Posted August 28, 2015 Posted August 28, 2015 Im a girl. Yes because sometimes when people are confused and hurt, they do stupid things. Did she sleep with him once? Or maybe she thought she wanted to reconcile but discovered she didn't have feelings for him because she has feelings for you. Or she's a turd. Tread with caution but try and hope for the best if you still like her. I was on a similar situation with my game playing ex. I found out he was still talking to his ex GF AGAIN. My mistake was not setting boundaries and telling him I don't want to be involved if they are still talking. I just assumed he would know that already. I'm a silly girl who trusted too much. Don't make the same mistake and make it clear.
Mrin Posted August 28, 2015 Posted August 28, 2015 I'll take a different spin on this - don't try to figure out why she did what she did and whether you're getting the whole story. Because that is all story - something you make up to give what happened meaning. It isn't truth. It isn't fact. It is just story. Stick with the facts - you dated, didn't like her connections with her ex. You broke up with her and she immediately had sex with her ex. Do you want to date a woman like this? If so, then go right ahead. If not, walk away. 6
Author louisthe15th Posted August 29, 2015 Author Posted August 29, 2015 @mitchapoolza I really wish shed be honest with me and just admit that she attempted to reconcile but she said otherwise. She despised him apparently. He cheated. She could be a stone. I'm really hoping I'm not the 2nd choice. I know she cared about me, but I want her to care about me without thinking of him. I didn't speak to her for month. They added eachother to socisl media.. Liking eachothers pics, but never hung out again after that one time. What was said that day I'd love to know.
aloneinaz Posted August 29, 2015 Posted August 29, 2015 @mitchapoolza I really wish shed be honest with me and just admit that she attempted to reconcile but she said otherwise. She despised him apparently. He cheated. She could be a stone. I'm really hoping I'm not the 2nd choice. I know she cared about me, but I want her to care about me without thinking of him. I didn't speak to her for month. They added eachother to socisl media.. Liking eachothers pics, but never hung out again after that one time. What was said that day I'd love to know. How old are you both?
Gus Grimly Posted August 29, 2015 Posted August 29, 2015 Well, your worries will always eat you up because she's the kinda girl that gives her BFs ulcers. Be a man, walk away from that drama. She's loving the fact she's got 2 guys vying for her affection. Ex BF in the picture? I'd be long gone.
mitchapalooza Posted August 29, 2015 Posted August 29, 2015 I didn't realize they became Facebook friends. That sounds like trouble. I'll say it again don't make the same mistake I did. I did give it another shot and couldn't get past the lack of trust after. I could have saved myself a lot of heartache if I ripped off the band aid months ago. We want to believe they want us only but they don't know what they want. It just made me look like a complete psycho because I did not handle myself gracefully. At this point let the dude have her and find someone worthy of your love. Its her loss!
Author louisthe15th Posted August 29, 2015 Author Posted August 29, 2015 I just don't understand why she can't admit her faults. I'm a man. I can accept the truth. Even she wasn't really over him, just say it. If she was craving him the whole time, admit it. Why won't she? I seriously just need some maturity out of her and her honesty. I can't leave without knowing the truth.
mitchapalooza Posted August 29, 2015 Posted August 29, 2015 I've learned that its human nature to not admit our own faults. I gave up on getting an honest answer from someone who doesn't feel I am worthy of it. That is where I found my truth. Soon you will be rid of these feelings and eventually open your heart to someone new and awesome. Don't forget your own self worth in the process. If you feel like there is something missing out of the story, there is. Follow your gut. 1
Mondmellonw Posted August 29, 2015 Posted August 29, 2015 Personally, I wouldn't go have sex with an ex if I just recently had a break up with someone I loved. Heck, I would never have sex with an ex. She doesn't sound honest. My advice is.... Listen to your gut, and trust yourself. Take care!
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