scrapironsd Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 10 days ago, my girlfriend stated she wanted a break from our relationship. She didn't give any specifics or time frame and just gave me the "I'm a nice guy, but I need a break to figure things out". We have been dating for the past couple of months and of course I thought everything was going great. I have feelings for her and want to continue the relationship. So far, I have given her space and haven't contacted her. I don't know whether I should send a text and/or email asking if she would be willing to go to lunch sometime or just wait it out until she is ready to contact me (if she ever does). Each day gets tougher, but I feel if I contact her, it may ruin everything. Any advice would be appreciated.
usernametaken Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 10 days ago, my girlfriend stated she wanted a break from our relationship. She didn't give any specifics or time frame and just gave me the "I'm a nice guy, but I need a break to figure things out". We have been dating for the past couple of months and of course I thought everything was going great. I have feelings for her and want to continue the relationship. So far, I have given her space and haven't contacted her. I don't know whether I should send a text and/or email asking if she would be willing to go to lunch sometime or just wait it out until she is ready to contact me (if she ever does). Each day gets tougher, but I feel if I contact her, it may ruin everything. Any advice would be appreciated. Did she give you a reason? Had you been fighting or not getting along? I would give her space. Maybe you're smothering her a bit. That said, women rarely need breaks. I wouldn't get my hopes up too much. Sorry. 1
smackie9 Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 It's a cowards way of saying I'm attracted to someone else and I am considering breaking up with you. 3
Author scrapironsd Posted August 27, 2015 Author Posted August 27, 2015 No, she never stated any specific reason other than she needs time to figure things out. She did mention she felt the relationship was moving too fast, but again never gave any specifics or details. We have never had an argument and in my mind had been getting along great. 1
Tobin Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 She asked for time, you give her time. Don't contact her until and unless you hear from her, and after you decide you've waited long enough go back out there and start looking for someone new. If it was me I'd already be looking but hey that's just me. 3
Diezel Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 Buddy, sorry but she broke up with you, you just don't know it yet. She's using the "break" as a trial time to go out with someone else, if it doesn't work out, she'll come back to you. Next time she talks to you, tell her that the breakup is permanent. 2
mightycpa Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 You really need to do two things: 1) You need to accept that she doesn't like you nearly as much as you like her. 2) Then you need to act on that. What she's really done is given you time to figure that out without saying it. 1
Mrin Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 She asked for time, you give her time. Don't contact her until and unless you hear from her, and after you decide you've waited long enough go back out there and start looking for someone new. If it was me I'd already be looking but hey that's just me. This. Do this. Do not contact her first unless it is to say that you want t to officially cut ties because you're interested in dating someone else. Sorry dude. Consider yourself man hugged by me. 1
central Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 There was a thread somewhere else that discussed breaks. Many of the women there said that they asked for a break when they wanted to sleep with someone else as part of figuring out who they wanted. It's all legitimate if you're on a break, they said, so no harm, no foul. Most of the men disagreed, though, and assumed a break was about time apart, and NOT time spent in bed with someone else! So, she may well be doing this. If so, she will probably lie about it if she decides she prefers you. How will this affect taking her back? Or will you be pursuing others too?
SawtoothMars Posted August 27, 2015 Posted August 27, 2015 No, she never stated any specific reason other than she needs time to figure things out. She did mention she felt the relationship was moving too fast, but again never gave any specifics or details. We have never had an argument and in my mind had been getting along great. Did you lay out some ground rules for "the break"? For example, can she date and screw other guys... then if it doesn't work out come back to you like nothing happened? If you have not. Then you need to be VERY clear with her what kind of behavior you are willing to accept in this situation. I would say 90% of the time when women do this, they already have another guy lined up who seems better than you that they would like to try out. This allows them to do as they please while you wait around like the worlds biggest schmuck. :bunny:
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