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Posted

You know, I was listening to the radio last nite and this chick had an issue with a dude and while I won't go into the issue she was having with dude, my thing was, the guys on the radio show told her that she "deserved" an answer and if dude won't come clean, she needs to dump him.

 

So, that raises a question here...

 

Do you think that in dating and/or a RL you have a "right" for someone to communicate certain things to you?

 

If you're interested in what issue this chick had, seems like dude wasn't having sex with her and she just wanted to know why. When she asked "why", he would get defensive and she'd feel guilty for wanting to walk away....

 

The radio guys told her something that "I" agree with - which is: "while sex isn't the only thing needed in a successful RL, a RL w/o sex isn't gonna work either...so, she has a right to know why he doesn't wanna have sex so she can decide if she's gonna stay in a sexless RL....also, that he should understand that whatever it is, she's not gonna judge and/or shame him (ie deformed penis, gay, bisexual, asexual, childhood abuse)"

 

I mean, you just can't leave people in the dark when you are/aren't doing certain things with them in dating and/or a RL and expect them to hang around. They have a right to know certain things about you.

 

Now, I've posted what my stance is - as long as what's going on with you (and/or your past) isn't affecting your current RL and/or future with someone, you have no obligation to disclose...but in this chick's case, it was affecting their RL and she had a right to know or break up with him...IMO

Posted

ummm... of course. shouldn't that be really obvious?

 

I personally think a relationship should have full disclosure on all topics, including your past...

Posted

If it's causing an issue, then yes answer the question. I don't think "full disclosure" is necessary. No needy to bring old baggage into a new relationship. But problems (including foreseeable ones) should be discussed openly.

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