Dio castillo Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 So we have been dating for one and half year, so this is quite a long tern, intimate relationship. We know each other very well and we allowed each other to walk into both life pretty much very deeply. She even talks about getting married and have kids. During this time, we fought quite a few times. The problem mostly because of communication or idea differences. She was not a very good communicator. My problem probably was my ego, I tend to walk away or keep distance every time we fought, saying something like "Forget it" or " Maybe we both need some time alone" things like that. Maybe she thinks that every time we fought it is always her problem and I am always stay upper handed. This time we fought over some small unimportant matters,she said to me she need to clam down and she doesn't want to see me temporarily. After two week I called her and meet up with her, her mind was fill with anger, crying and barely talk. she only tell me she needs time to think about whether to break up with me or not. I called three days after and ask what's her decision, only to get cold& indifference break up. I delete her facebook and never talk to her ever since. I believe the reason she broke up with me has something to do with her family& friends opinions, her own insecurity, she doesn't see any future with me. I lost my job month ago before she break up with me. Now I am completely depressed. Is there any way to convince her that she has future with me? I know deep inside I still have feelings for her.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 So we have been dating for one and half year, so this is quite a long tern, intimate relationship. We know each other very well and we allowed each other to walk into both life pretty much very deeply. She even talks about getting married and have kids. During this time, we fought quite a few times. The problem mostly because of communication or idea differences. She was not a very good communicator. My problem probably was my ego, I tend to walk away or keep distance every time we fought, saying something like "Forget it" or " Maybe we both need some time alone" things like that. Maybe she thinks that every time we fought it is always her problem and I am always stay upper handed. This time we fought over some small unimportant matters,she said to me she need to clam down and she doesn't want to see me temporarily. After two week I called her and meet up with her, her mind was fill with anger, crying and barely talk. she only tell me she needs time to think about whether to break up with me or not. I called three days after and ask what's her decision, only to get cold& indifference break up. I delete her facebook and never talk to her ever since. I believe the reason she broke up with me has something to do with her family& friends opinions, her own insecurity, she doesn't see any future with me. I lost my job month ago before she break up with me. Now I am completely depressed. Is there any way to convince her that she has future with me? I know deep inside I still have feelings for her. No, you can't convince someone to be with you if they don't want to. And do you really want to be with someone who doesn't come back on their own, but needs to be persuaded? You said you often shut her out and said you needed time to be alone when you fought. That builds a lot of resentment and probably made her feel she was walking on eggshells, never knowing when you might actually leave for good. Never say those things unless you mean it. And if she doesn't see a future with you, it's done. But I have to wonder, OP, why you want her back. The title of thread states that your ego is hurt - so? That's not a good reason to get back together. What qualities does she have that make her a good partner for you? And vice versa? Those are the reasons reconciliation could be considered. If you want to reach out, you could try calling. But I'm not sure you'll be welcomed back with open arms.
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