Jadedbyluv Posted August 24, 2015 Posted August 24, 2015 I haven't had very successful long term relationships. Most relationships I have had ended in under six months. I am just curious as to how others know if there is a real future with someone. 1
Clarence_Boddicker Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 Female or male? Age? Who did the dumping? Define future for you. 1
MixedUpChick Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 I don't see how you can really ever know, until it is the future & you're still together. I think there can be things that tell you there won't be a future, but other than that, it's all a big unknown. 1
Author Jadedbyluv Posted August 25, 2015 Author Posted August 25, 2015 Female or male? Age? Who did the dumping? Define future for you. I'm a 30 year old female. Future for me is seeing something long term with someone. And I've never felt that right away with anybody. 1
Zippy2000 Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 Nobody can ever know what the future will be. Yes you can. You just need 1.2 gigawatts and a flux capacitor. 3
Author Jadedbyluv Posted August 25, 2015 Author Posted August 25, 2015 I don't see how you can really ever know, until it is the future & you're still together. I think there can be things that tell you there won't be a future, but other than that, it's all a big unknown. What things can tell you that there won't be a future? Besides wanting different things or having different values and morals. 1
MixedUpChick Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 What things can tell you that there won't be a future? Besides wanting different things or having different values and morals. Exactly those things, lol. But as far as knowing if there is a future, if you like someone, date them & take a chance & see what happens. Don't worry too much about the long term future & take it a day at a time. 2
Satu Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 A clipping from my journal: If you feel OK: You look at the past, and the past looks OK. If you feel bad: You look at the past, and the past looks bad. If you feel OK: You imagine the future, and the future looks OK. If you feel bad: You imagine the future, and the future looks bad. What that means is that you have to find ways of making yourself feel OK in the present, so that you can have a past and future that look OK to you! One way of looking at things is to consider life as consisting of frustrations and satisfactions. You have frustrations in your life, and some of them can't be made to go away. So what you have to do is add satisfactions. Do things that make you feel good Go to places that make you feel good. Read books that make you feel good. Listen to music that makes you feel good. Do exercise that makes you feel good. Watch movies that make you feel good. And so on, and so on, and so on. Build a list of things that make you feel good, and do them. 3
Clarence_Boddicker Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 I'm a 30 year old female. Future for me is seeing something long term with someone. And I've never felt that right away with anybody. So who did most of the dumping? How long in? Kinda hard to see the future. For me it's being in a state where I want to spend almost every minute with someone. Tell them everything that's on my mind. I guess after awhile you start to decide if they are compatible with you & share some of the same goals. 1
newmoon Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 you don't really know. but as long as you're getting along, working through problems, and enjoying one anothers' company you keep forging ahead. you'll make it farther with someone you match better with, simple as that. bad matches end faster. 1
Poppyolive Posted August 25, 2015 Posted August 25, 2015 (edited) Satu, the voice of reason. I completely agree with Satu's note/journal entry. I use a gratitude journal daily. Where I write things I am grateful for. who does this help, you ask? It puts you in a different perspective. You see things more positively, thus noticing when positive things happen and being open to great opportunities. On the flip side, if you are in a negative mood, all things are tainted, you want be bothered with opportunities, you won't notice the light. I may sound like a right nut bar, but trust me. Go get yourself a new journal and write all the things you are greatful for. Edited August 25, 2015 by Poppyolive 2
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