greentealover Posted August 22, 2015 Posted August 22, 2015 Hi guys, I have recently come out of a toxic relationship. I didn't have feelings for my partner as I used to, for that person did not respect me. I've been talking to another guy who I always look forward to messaging, and I just like talking to. I know I'm not rushing into any relationship, but talking to this guy feels natural, and he makes me feel good about myself. He wanted to meet up soon, and I want to go, but I don't want to rush things. He docent know I have come out of a relationship recently, and I'm scared to tell him in case he gets the wrong idea. I don't want to scare him away. Is this being slutty? I just like talking to this guy, and I get a warm feeling that I haven't had in a while. Is it too soon? Should i just not message him? Im also afraid Ill encounter my ex, and he will ruin things for me. I don't know what to do.
yxalitis Posted August 22, 2015 Posted August 22, 2015 Without knowing how long "recently"...the very fact that you think it's too soon...means it is. You can proceed to meet him, but remember where you are...this is likely to be a rebound relationship...and may not last.
Author greentealover Posted August 22, 2015 Author Posted August 22, 2015 The thing is, I wanted to get out of the relationship for quite a while. I don't have feelings for my ex. I don't want to start a new relationship. I just want to be friends for now, as this guy is interesting. If I were to rebound, it wouldn't be this guy.
smackie9 Posted August 22, 2015 Posted August 22, 2015 This guy is obviously interested....do not lead him out of your own satisfaction to feel good just talking. He wants more than that and withholding the fact you are unsure or not ready at this time is unfair to him. Remember this isn't just about YOU when you start stuff like this with a guy. He's not looking for a friend. You are better to be upfront with him before he gets too involved with you. I think you owe him that. 1
Versacehottie Posted August 22, 2015 Posted August 22, 2015 Are you sure you are actually "out" of the relationship? You keep switching tenses within your wording as if the relationship with your ex is not really over. Are you actually broken up? If you are, I see no problem with liking a new guy. You are free to do what you want. No guilt. I can't see why you would be feeling guilty at all--unless your "ex" doesn't really know it's 100% over. As they say, keep your side of the street clean. 1
Author greentealover Posted August 22, 2015 Author Posted August 22, 2015 I am out of the relationship, which felt like a relief. Like I had chains lifted off me. I have interest in this guy, i really want to get to know him, but i just want to take things slow because i just got out of a relationship. 1
Learningtowalkagain Posted August 22, 2015 Posted August 22, 2015 Be up front, tell him in your own way you're into him but you just got out of a relationship and want to take things slowly. You said the relationship was toxic and you wanted out for a while so emotionally you probably checked out a while ago. You shouldn't feel 'slutty' unless you're still in the relationship but you said it's over. Don't over complicate things. Hang out, take it slow, see if the chemistry can holdup. Don't jump into another relationship but see where it goes. 2
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