Is He into Me, or What?

[rossi_girl]

[font=arial][/font][color=indigo][/color] alright guys, here it is. i met this guy online about a month ago. without going into too much detail, we realized while we are talking that we have met online before. in fact we were to go out on a date, but i backed out at the last minute. if i remember correctly it was a very bad case of nerves. anyway, boy invites girl to movie, girl accepts and off they go. we went to a movie that night and stayed up talking until 530am. yes in the morning. for all you youngin's that may seem like nothing, but we are both in our 30's and should know better. however, that night it seemed that ideas were expressed by each of us and it turns out we both have alot in common. so the next night, boy calls girl and asks her over to his place. girl accepts and off they go. it was a wonderful evening. we made out like teenagers, without the sex. said boy and girl part ways and move on with their work weeks. a week later, boy calls girl to ask her out of a date a week in a half in advance. said boy is out of state working and wants to make sure to see said girl upon return. girl accepts, knowing that said boy is really hotly missing her. boy returns, they have dinner, watch a movie and spend the evening in each others arms. now it's a couple of dates later and said girl is a bit confused. said boy is nice, respectful and funny. however there is no romantic displays of affection from said boy and this troubles said girl. what should i make of this? the guy does not call or write by e-mail anymore. he now sends any email the afternoon of the evening that he wants to see me. what is up with this??? at first i was leery of getting involved, because i figured he was looking for a booty call. but it has been more than two dates and he still wants to spend time with me. though not much in the way of communication ensues. i will admit that after sex i am not in the mood for talking. and through dinner we can find topics to discuss with ease. however he has made no mention of dating and i feel like we are in a very casual situation right now. so much so that i am out dating other people. i mean he makes no moves to let me know that he wants anything to be different between us. i am worried that this may end up being he really likes me and when he finds out i am going out with others, he will be upset and hurt. but if i want to date someone even somewhat casual exclusive-like, i make it point to sit down and talk to them about it. now we have talked about casual sexual partners, but even that conversation i had to initiate. am i making to big of a deal about this or what?? i am used to dating men that i can talk to about relationship issues and when we talked about the casual sexual partners stuff, he seemed to get very uncomfortable. like i got the feeling, he thought i wanted a more definite relationship with him. when all i wanted was to find out if he is shagging anyone else other than me. so guys and gals can you give me some insight into this guy??? right now, i feel like it isn't going to work between us because i am able to talk about things and he is not. the sex is really hot. i mean make butter melt hot. but if i cannot talk to the guy without him going all red and pacing and stuff, then there is no way i should be sexing with him. feel me????

 

i know that he is not seeing anyone else and he is difinitely single. we have both been over to each other's place. i just feel like the fit with this guy is only okay. i normally date guys that fit me perfectly, as in we date in the same ways. intense attraction, coupled with a high desire for monogomy. however i am unsure about this guy. from what he tells me he seems like a reformed player, but i guess a cat never changes his stripes. or maybe he is just emotionally unavailable. still in love with another girl and unable or unwilling to be emotionally involved with me. or maybe he is really shy and is not used to dating someone so capable of expressing themselves. though i doubt the last one could ever be the case. on our way home the other night, i mentioned to him that on this date it seemed that we really talked the most. and he said to me, what are you talking about we talked until 530am on our first date. men, ugh! i will never understand them. i know that some guys are way indepentdent of their partners and do not feel the need to share everything in their lives with them. i also have many, many, many guy friends and the first sign that they really, really, really like a girl for them, is when they want to spend all of the time with her, even if it is doing the smallest thing and want to talk with her all the time. it seems really simplistic and dumb, but there you have it. i am truly afraid that i am being intimate with someone that really, deep down inside does not like me. not that he is mean in anyway, but just not that into me. feel me???

[Merin]

Hmm..

 

Well My take is this.. IF this Guy is all about dating you on HIS time schedule

AND he's all about having sex with you BUT he isn't willing to make this an exclusive relationship where you're BOTH happy and on the same page.. then yeah maybe he isn't that into you.

 

Regardless.. IMO if he isn't willing to have an exclusive relationship with you and he isn't willing to discuss this then you're not doing anything wrong in seeing other people as well.. IME when a Guy/Girl is really into that other person they take whatever measures neccessary to ensure that person is ONLY with them know what I'm saying? So if this Guy isn't taking the initiative to seal the deal with you so to speak then don't feel bad to continue to look for what you do want.