Amy77 Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 OK so I've been dating a guy for the past about 2 months and we have met up a few times and he would always text me alot, I stayed at his after a night out on Saturday night and he sent me a few texts on Sunday afterwards but that was about it, said he would text me later but then nothing since? He's also ignoring all my posts on Instagram which he would usually 'like' and liking loads of others peoples'. We were never anything serious so I don't know will I look weird if I text him and ask why he has stopped talking to me, its been 4 days now so do ye think I should? I actually really like him but it seems obvious he don't feel the same ATM Link to post Share on other sites
La.Primavera Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 There is only one way to find out for sure. You could keep it simple, "Hey haven't heard from you in a few days, are you ok?" That way if he can reach out to you if there is something going on in his life or otherwise you can take his silence as a rejection, but at least you will know it wasn't through lack of effort on your part. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 Did you sleep with him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Amy77 Posted August 21, 2015 Author Share Posted August 21, 2015 I slept in bed with him and we kissed and stuff but we didn't have sex? :/ I'm so confused I just wish he would text me to show he's still interested its annoying me not knowing Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 I thought you had sex.....which is why he stopped either because sex was bad or he thought the relationship was established so he let of the gas pedal. If you didn't have sex then that is why...he was expecting sex it didn't happen. You have been talking for 2 months so he says forget it. Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 Whenever this has happened to me, I figured: 1. He's dead; 2. He's lying as a complete quadriplegic in an emergency ward somewhere; or 3. He's no longer interested. In any of the three possible scenarios, there's not a damned thing I can do about it, so I simply move on. When and if he resurfaces, I'll breathlessly hear all about how he was able to so completely recover from his death-defying experiences... ...without even a limp to show for it. Best of luck to you, OP... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 A phone call would clear it up. Why not call? A voice tells you everything. Text is inadequate. You mean his voice on a recording when he doesn't pick up? He has been ignoring her texts ...there is every reason to believe he most likely will ignore her calls too. He does not wish to communicate with her right now. OP, try not to think about it, and live your life...sounds like for whatever reason he has lost interest. Sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
Strahatmak Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 There is only one way to find out for sure. You could keep it simple, "Hey haven't heard from you in a few days, are you ok?" That way if he can reach out to you if there is something going on in his life or otherwise you can take his silence as a rejection, but at least you will know it wasn't through lack of effort on your part. Good luck. I second on that. OP text him if you die for an absolute answer; but text him or not, live your life, cut him from your mind. Sorry this has happened. Link to post Share on other sites
Lansing Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 You mean his voice on a recording when he doesn't pick up? He has been ignoring her texts ...there is every reason to believe he most likely will ignore her calls too. . Actually, OP didn't say that she contacted him. Just that he didn't contact her and he didn't like her Instagram pics. He could be thinking "I am tired if keeping to put in effort, does this girl even like me?" And be waiting for you to initiate. Did he try ti make a move on you and you resisted during your last date? Link to post Share on other sites
KatZee Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 You've been classically "ghosted." Exact same thing happened to me, to a T! actually. Dating this dude unofficially 2 months, slept over his house on a Saturday night, never heard from him again. Poof, gone. Like a fart in the wind. These guys are cowards. They wouldn't know how to be real men if a real man walked up to them and gave them the instruction manual in audio book form. Link to post Share on other sites
xcupid Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 I'm sorry to say but it looks to me like he wanted to have sex, he didn't get sex, so he disappeared. A guy who is GENUINELY interested in you and is SERIOUS about you will romance you and woo you and get to know you. If he's not doing that even 2 months into things then he was only looking for sex all along. By your own admission there wasn't anything serious going on. Don't text him. Don't respond to him if he texts or contacts you. Move on to someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated. You were smart not to have sex with him otherwise your thread would have been a completely different topic. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 As a guy, I can tell you he wouldn't of vanished on you if he liked you. He would be checking in with you. Since he hasn't, he lost interest and his silence means he's no longer interested. I'm not sure how many guys (or gals) would want to wait thru 2 months of dating before having sex. What's the average amount of dates before having sex 3-4? I've lost count on how many threads women have posted over the years complaining that they have 4-5 dates and the guy won't put the moves on them so they can get laid. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Strahatmak Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 As a guy, I can tell you he wouldn't of vanished on you if he liked you. He would be checking in with you. Since he hasn't, he lost interest and his silence means he's no longer interested. I'm not sure how many guys (or gals) would want to wait thru 2 months of dating before having sex. What's the average amount of dates before having sex 3-4? I've lost count on how many threads women have posted over the years complaining that they have 4-5 dates and the guy won't put the moves on them so they can get laid. No offense and just my very own opinion, this is disgusting. I had a very bad experience with one of my ex that we had sex in the early stage. Ended up I found out that he was obsessive in sex and had a very wrong idea of sex, like he was using it as a tool to manipulate and saw every of my male friends wanted me to get laid. 4 -5 dates just aren't enough to know someone well enough to make me feel secure and comfortable after what had happened. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 No offense and just my very own opinion, this is disgusting. I had a very bad experience with one of my ex that we had sex in the early stage. Ended up I found out that he was obsessive in sex and had a very wrong idea of sex, like he was using it as a tool to manipulate and saw every of my male friends wanted me to get laid. 4 -5 dates just aren't enough to know someone well enough to make me feel secure and comfortable after what had happened. No offense taken. I'm not the one who came up with those numbers. I'm only sharing what I've experienced and what seems to be the norm on the dating scene. Dating off/on over the past 7 years with woman in their 40's, those numbers where the absolute norm. Many woman shared this w/me on dates as well. Obviously, people need to decide when they are comfortable w/having sex with someone. It could be date 1 or a month or two. All I was saying is that many women and men wouldn't wait that long before having sex, especially if they are in their 30's or 40's.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Fleur de cactus Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 It just happened to me yesterday with a guy a met online 3 days ago. We were quick to chat on line. Then we exchanged phone numbers and we move to texting. He bombarded me with a ton of msg! literally! Oh my! he sent me hundreds of messages in 2 nights from 7 PM to 10 PM! I thought he was obsessed with me. Among the messages were 128 pictures!! In exchange I sent 4 pictures of me. He is in late 50, but his texting scared me. But I was not worried to much since all pictures were decent. It was about him young, his work, his hobbies, his favorite show, movies... However it was too much. But I thought maybe he wants to make sure I know enough about him before meeting in person. Anyway, he sent msg in every morning to greet me. yesterday morning he messaged me with good morning. I responded with good morning and wished him a good day. He responded by you too. Then it was quiet!! It was like the container is empty. I talked to myself that he now wonder why he is the one who has to text first. I texted him around 8 PM asking how his day was. He responded at 11 PM with " I just got home; good night." This morning no good morning like he did for the last 3 days. I am a kind of relieved. I did not like the txting but by the same time, why he overdid it and suddenly shut down? There is other thing I want to mention, while txting he asked if we could meet for jogging. I said yes. He said, then we can go home to relax. I respond " Jogging is a good idea, but "I don't go to people home before I am sure who they are." I think he did not like my response and is busy with someone who will jog with him and go straight to his home. Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 What exactly happened Saturday night? Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 What exactly happened Saturday night? Well, whatever happened, or didn't happen, *something* about Saturday night turned him off, since he pulled back immediately afterwards.... Link to post Share on other sites
Empyrea Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 It could be that he was just looking for sex and now feels that he has put enough time/dates/effort into it without a payoff, so he's moving on. I've had guy friends tell me that if a girl doesn't put out after three dates, they move on, because they're not really interested in pursuing anything serious and they're the ones planning and paying for the dates, so at one point it's just not worth it. I think if he were seriously into you then 2 months is not too long to wait, especially if you've only met a couple times, not like every week of that 2 months. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts