Jason22 Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I'm very new to doing something like this so bear with me and please help any way possible. I don't really know where to start but I will try my best to say what I need to. I am trying to get back with the mother of my child. We were together for over 5 years when we split and had been through it all. We were each others first real relationship and first loves for sure. During the first two years of us I was a terrible boyfriend. I cheated and lied I was just an overall bad person but she stuck with me. We had broken up which could have been for good but she was in a serious car accident and broke her neck along with other things. I was the first person at the hospital. I didn't leave her side after that for months. We hadn't offically gotten back together yet but it was inevitable. After she went through strenuous rehab and was back on her feet I got her pregnant. Those 9 months were rough, I was always faithful and attended every appointment but when I wasn't with her I was a drunk and eventually a drug addict. But still I was there for the birth of daughter and things were good. Fast forward two years and the drugs became a problem and she eventually gave me an ultimatum to get clean or lose her. Which I did and then she still decided to leave. One day after we had broken up she was with someone else. I didn't take it very well sprialed out of control. Always being a good father though and had my daughter Joplin more than 50% of the time. My biggest problem was I never gave her the space she needed after the break up. I tried to hard to get her back then I think it's hurting me now. I have been sober for over a year and I have my daughter now %75 of the time. She on the other hand went off the rails, drinking every night and sleeping around. She is now 6 months pregnant with a second child that is not mine but the dad is not in the picture. She seems to be back to her old self now that she is pregnant and we hang out a lot. When we do we get along great but she still refuses to give me a chance. I love my daughter with all my heart I have a great job and a good support system. But for some reason I'm still not happy without her she is the missing piece to my life. I am scared I will never recover from this being that it has been 3+ years since we split. Someone please tell me what I am to do. If I can ever get her back or get through this. Im sorry if none of this makes sense or it's to long I just don't know where else to turn.
NoLeafClover Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I'm very new to doing something like this so bear with me and please help any way possible. I don't really know where to start but I will try my best to say what I need to. I am trying to get back with the mother of my child. We were together for over 5 years when we split and had been through it all. We were each others first real relationship and first loves for sure. During the first two years of us I was a terrible boyfriend. I cheated and lied I was just an overall bad person but she stuck with me. We had broken up which could have been for good but she was in a serious car accident and broke her neck along with other things. I was the first person at the hospital. I didn't leave her side after that for months. We hadn't offically gotten back together yet but it was inevitable. After she went through strenuous rehab and was back on her feet I got her pregnant. Those 9 months were rough, I was always faithful and attended every appointment but when I wasn't with her I was a drunk and eventually a drug addict. But still I was there for the birth of daughter and things were good. Fast forward two years and the drugs became a problem and she eventually gave me an ultimatum to get clean or lose her. Which I did and then she still decided to leave. One day after we had broken up she was with someone else. I didn't take it very well sprialed out of control. Always being a good father though and had my daughter Joplin more than 50% of the time. My biggest problem was I never gave her the space she needed after the break up. I tried to hard to get her back then I think it's hurting me now. I have been sober for over a year and I have my daughter now %75 of the time. She on the other hand went off the rails, drinking every night and sleeping around. She is now 6 months pregnant with a second child that is not mine but the dad is not in the picture. She seems to be back to her old self now that she is pregnant and we hang out a lot. When we do we get along great but she still refuses to give me a chance. I love my daughter with all my heart I have a great job and a good support system. But for some reason I'm still not happy without her she is the missing piece to my life. I am scared I will never recover from this being that it has been 3+ years since we split. Someone please tell me what I am to do. If I can ever get her back or get through this. Im sorry if none of this makes sense or it's to long I just don't know where else to turn. Your ex is having someone elses baby after she left you...and you think you will get over all this. Like it doesn't bother you she went to sleep around with random man and got pregnant...and now you have to raise your kid and someone elses kid? She is not the same person you married. She has moved on and doesn't care about you like that my man. Find someone better, she is not your missing piece. She is what you think you are making her be in your mind.
xpaperxcutx Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 You guyd have way too much history between the two of you. The relationship is broken. Yoi need to heal and she needs to heal. The only way to do that is to be a good father and man. If you havent kick the drug habit yet, go to 12 steps program and get yourself clean. Pick yourself up and get a good job that will at pay for child support. You wsnt her or anyone to give you a chance? Show people you can change and lead a decent life.
Author Jason22 Posted August 21, 2015 Author Posted August 21, 2015 You guyd have way too much history between the two of you. The relationship is broken. Yoi need to heal and she needs to heal. The only way to do that is to be a good father and man. If you havent kick the drug habit yet, go to 12 steps program and get yourself clean. Pick yourself up and get a good job that will at pay for child support. You wsnt her or anyone to give you a chance? Show people you can change and lead a decent life. Thank you for your imput. I have gotten clean and do have a good job. Currently I have primary custody so I'm taken care things for sure. I just cant seem to get past this one hump.
CollegeKid101 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 Hi Jason, I'm probably not qualified to give advice since I'm 20. However, first off congrats on being sober and off of drugs! That is an amazing accomplishment and the fact that you have a good job is even better. Kutos to you. Now, in my honest opinion, your relationship is broken and you should move on. Maybe this will help, that child in her belly was sperm that entered from another man's penis. You are a better person and need to move on. Be the very best father that you can be and find a suitable partner that can be a role model for her. Somebody who is an alcoholic and or sleeps around with random men, is not somebody you want your daughter to become. Good luck, Jason.
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