treehugger101 Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 As the question states, how do you know if you are really over your ex? My last ex was 4 years ago, I was with him for 3 years and truly cared and loved him a lot. But to this day I still think of him sometimes, sometimes looked at his page during my dating phase, and mention or talk about him sometimes with family or friends. Are these signs that I am not over him?
Gus Grimly Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 Some people will say "There's nobody you don't get over". But I disagree. I feel you do get over past loves, but not with all of them. The thought of them will always be painful. The loss of love can be quite tragic. Being in love, truly in love with someone, you allow them deep inside where not may others have been. They become a part of you, which can't be expunged from your heart and soul that easily. 2
contel3 Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I know I'm over them when I see them and feel nothing. When it doesn't affect me to talk to them. When all I feel while looking at their Facebook page is curiosity. When they randomly come up in conversation and I don't care about it. With one ex I knew I was over him when he contacted me after years of NC and we started exchanging romantic advice lol 2
aloneinaz Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 For me, I know I'm over them when I can think about them having hot sex with someone else and it doesn't bother me in the least. You also know because you don't think of them very often and when you do, you think "I'm so glad I'm not with that person anymore".. 1
erklat Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 Some people will say "There's nobody you don't get over". But I disagree. I feel you do get over past loves, but not with all of them. The thought of them will always be painful. The loss of love can be quite tragic. Being in love, truly in love with someone, you allow them deep inside where not may others have been. They become a part of you, which can't be expunged from your heart and soul that easily. With this I can agree! Men especially, sometimes never get over. They just learn how to live with it. 1
CollegeKid101 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 Interesting question.. I too sometimes think about this. I dated a girl in high school, I know young and dumb, but what I felt for her was extraordinary. She ended up being somebody I didn't even know existed and hurt me pretty bad, afterwards she chased back after me, but I had moved on with another girl because I just could not get over what she had done to me. I'm no longer with that girl and frequently think of my ex, probably 4-5 times a week. Nothing like I want this girl back or I'm so in love with her, but I do still have feelings for her even though it's been nearly 1.5 years since I blocked her. I like other girls and actually plan to pursue this girl I met at school recently. But I know she'll probably always have a part of me, hopefully not, but that's my gut feeling sometimes. In my honest answer, you know you're over them when you don't have feelings for them/don't get that pit in your stomach when you hear their name. So I think I just convinced myself I'm not over her , thanks for making this topic OP! Just kidding! I even thought about texting her in the summer to catch up, but decided it what be a bad idea since I did not want old feelings to reappear. For my other ex's I know I'm over them when I see them with somebody and I don't care and when I have no desire to talk to them again. 1
YellowPetal Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 I think I was over my ex as soon I found out he cheated on me. That night, I felt something break inside of me and there was nothing left. My eyes opened and I realized the person I loved never existed. Unfortunately, I am not over what he did to me. After three months, I am still angry and I get depressed from time to time. 1
candie13 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 when you find yourself dating other people and suddenly realize life actually moves on . When you are seeing other people, having a great time, becoming intimate and realizing the thought of your ex never even passed through your head the entire time they were there... and you're not even inlove. When another person falls asleep in your bed and you're almost surprised by the lack of guilt... when you realize the ghost of your ex sizing you from the corner of the room has vanished. So yeah, generally speaking, when I realize I'm happy again, when I feel healthy and it's got nothing to do with another person and nothing's dragging me down. When I'm balanced, at ease and I can watch my friends inlove and kissing eachother and not feel like i'm missing out on anything, even though I'm single. When I look forward to the future by myself. When I start getting excited about new plans with friends... when life moves on and is gentle with me . 1
icyfeline Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 I think some ex's enter your mind no matter how much time has passed. In the last couple of years I've found myself thinking about my ex from 6 years ago on & off quite a bit. It really bothered me at first, but now I've just accepted that he'll always be part of my life. I think in that respect it's possible to move on from someone, but not be over them entirely if that makes any sense. 1
candie13 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 I think, in my case, losing my ex as a reference point in my daily life is the biggest achievement. I may probably still size him up against new men I am dating, when that's going to become a little more serious... but i understood what made him so special to me and I also understood the mistakes I've been making when dating him. Still, that's in the future. When i do not spend time thinking about him or wanting to talk about him with my friends, when I can make reference in a conversation about something in our RS to prove a point to my friends without it dragging me down, when I keep NC effortlessly, when I am void of any negative or positive emotions when talking about him or someone reminding me of him. When I see myself just shrugging my shoulders and continuing to do what I'm doing undisturbed... 1
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