Ruby Slippers Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I've been off the dating scene for a while, but when did all this become normal? I went on my first date in a loooong time recently and the girl looked at me like I was crazy when I grabbed the bill and wasn't planning to split it. She even said "What are you doing?" when I went to open the door for her. Apparently guys have been paving the road to low expectations while I've been out of the game for a while now. It's not normal in my world. On every first date/meet I've gone to, the guy insisted on paying. I don't think it's men who are paving the way to low expectations. I think it's women who are setting the bar lower and lower, so many men barely have to exert the slightest effort anymore. 3
empresario Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 It's not normal in my world. On every first date/meet I've gone to, the guy insisted on paying. I don't think it's men who are paving the way to low expectations. I think it's women who are setting the bar lower and lower, so many men barely have to exert the slightest effort anymore. Agreed. It blows my mind when women tell me how crappy their ex-boyfriends have been all while choosing to be with them and Furthermore enabling their poor life actions/decisions. Then again the same could be said about men with crappy women. 2
gaius Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 My roommates girlfriend was parked outside my place for 3 hours the other day after he blocked her on fb over some trivial offense, then told her to basically get lost after she came over to argue about it. I started thinking he killed her and was hiding the body because who would park outside for that long after that but she was alive and being pathetic the whole time. =/ A lot of girls certainly do make it way too easy. Morten, all I can wonder is how you keep ending up gravitating toward these particular guys. Every woman I know has a terrible dating story or two but you keep ending up out with these types over and over.
RightThere Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I don't think it's men who are paving the way to low expectations. I think it's women who are setting the bar lower and lower, so many men barely have to exert the slightest effort anymore. Either way, I'm here to raise that bar back up! 1
fitnessfan365 Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 Okay peeps, here's my take. He DID notice her when she walked in, and for whatever reason, was not thrilled with what he noticed (not his physical type) ....so he sat down and ordered, probably hoping she would not see him, and assume he stood her up and left. I highly doubt if the woman of his dreams (physically speaking) walked in, he would have done that. NO WAY. It appears there was no love lost from either of them.... JMO Haha.. That sounds like something out of a spy novel. In all honesty though Katie, I think you're giving him way too much credit. He just sounds lazy and unschooled in dating.
katiegrl Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 (edited) Haha.. That sounds like something out of a spy novel. In all honesty though Katie, I think you're giving him way too much credit. He just sounds lazy and unschooled in dating. I know, Midwest said the same thing... I guess it's because I have been off the market and not dating in so long (like YEARS)....and when I was dating, I have personally never encountered such idiocy. It's just so hard to believe that some men can really be this stupid (sorry, "lazy and unschooled," which is the more politically correct way to say that... lol). When I did OLD, the guy always waited out front for me (or in the bar)...and probably watched me walk in even (from my car). Gave him a chance to scoot if he didn't like what he saw... hehe. Which never happened, but I know women who have done it. It's rude, but it happens. So that's why I thought that....but you're probably right... ;) Edited August 20, 2015 by katiegrl 1
Mischa101 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 I was thinking the same thing. Maybe he ordered first so that he wouldn't have to pay for your food, without having to actively refuse or make it awkward. Many women are looking for a free meal ticket. Maybe he was simply trying to avoid that. No, I don't think women are looking for a free meal ticket. Its just a respectable thing to do for your date. I agree he ordered food first to avoid paying for her.
Jj66 Posted August 21, 2015 Posted August 21, 2015 The guy sounds like a rude and inconsiderate bum. He did you a favor by being as rude as he was so you know to NEXT him. I always met my prospect outside if practical or at the bar if it was too hot or too cold. It's always refreshing when she actually looks like her pictures. I always offered to pay. It's just how I am. If she didn't offer to split it or at the very least say thank you nexted her. I got thanked by different women for "dating properly". I.e taking the initiative to go somewhere, do something fun, treating them nicely, and not just wanting to hang out, get drunk, and have sex. Apparently that is very common behavior now. There are definitely dinner whores out there. I've talked to some who are proud of it. One was telling me exactly how she did it and bragged that she could go to any restaurant she wanted any night of the week she wanted at someone else's expense. But this is clearly not the case here. A dinner whore would insist on a nicer place. 1
Mischa101 Posted August 23, 2015 Posted August 23, 2015 The guy sounds like a rude and inconsiderate bum. He did you a favor by being as rude as he was so you know to NEXT him. I always met my prospect outside if practical or at the bar if it was too hot or too cold. It's always refreshing when she actually looks like her pictures. I always offered to pay. It's just how I am. If she didn't offer to split it or at the very least say thank you nexted her. I got thanked by different women for "dating properly". I.e taking the initiative to go somewhere, do something fun, treating them nicely, and not just wanting to hang out, get drunk, and have sex. Apparently that is very common behavior now. There are definitely dinner whores out there. I've talked to some who are proud of it. One was telling me exactly how she did it and bragged that she could go to any restaurant she wanted any night of the week she wanted at someone else's expense. But this is clearly not the case here. A dinner whore would insist on a nicer place. I think it's OK to want to go to a nicer place for a proper date. Going there for a meal ticket is a bad thing and I'm not sure this woman was looking for a meal ticket! Please read my thread about "what happened here"...
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