UndercoverLover62 Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 So i've been single for just a few weeks now after a 3 year relationship, I'm feeling pretty good, I'm not sad/upset/angry etc. My friends and family have been an amazing support to me since it happened. Now my question is should I feel guilty about not feeling awful? I'm actually kind of relieved that I was not the one who had to end the relationship. Thanks!
HandsomeBoh Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I had the same feeling for about a week. Like I wanted to do everything that I had not been able to do without her. I slowly realised that it had been a pretty healthy relationship and we never prevented each other from doing anything, but without her, I couldn't do a lot of the things I used to love to do. After a week, I tried to rationalise why she left me and decided to make pro-active and concrete plans to change and be a better person so we could be together again. That was an empowering period of extreme optimism that everything will be better. She shot me straight down. After two weeks I completely unravelled and just became this sobbing mess. Every single thing reminded me of her. Then the begging started... So if you're missing the heartbreak, don't worry. It will come. Hard and furious.
aloneinaz Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 So i've been single for just a few weeks now after a 3 year relationship, I'm feeling pretty good, I'm not sad/upset/angry etc. My friends and family have been an amazing support to me since it happened. Now my question is should I feel guilty about not feeling awful? I'm actually kind of relieved that I was not the one who had to end the relationship. Thanks! I don't think it's unusual at all. If the relationship wasn't healthy or fulfilling, what's to miss? When relationships or more of a hassle than they are worth, then it's good that they've ended. Enjoy your free time and singlehood. I know I did after a few relationships. It was nice to breathe and not have to deal w/someone. It was liberating, for sure. Eventually, you will miss the companionship of a partner and will start dating again. 2
Author UndercoverLover62 Posted August 20, 2015 Author Posted August 20, 2015 Thanks everyone, I think I was just so emotionally done, even though I wasn't the one who ended the relationship. I know I'll miss companionship. For the most part it was a good relationship, it's just really hard to be with someone who is a narcissist and in that process I felt that making sure he was always happy made me lose my happiness.
Gus Grimly Posted August 20, 2015 Posted August 20, 2015 I felt that making sure he was always happy made me lose my happiness. I can relate with that. In my case, I tried to give as much as I could and in the process it sucked away all my energy, initiative and happiness. I wonder if always giving a 100% is a bad thing. Living with someone who shows signs of narcissism can be very exhausting and at times ego bruising. Not having any guilt or remorse is not necessarily a bad thing. It sounds like you are ahead of the game to be honest. I think most of us who've gone through break-ups would love to be so robust. Good for you. 1
Recommended Posts