cookiemonster26 Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 If I end up going on a date from online , and the conversation is decent, I cant help but take it personally when the guy doesnt text back. Did they think I was fat ? Did I ask too many questions about their hobbies and life? Even though others will text back, i always focus on the ones that dont and wonder what I did wrong. Any tips on how to not be so hard on yourself. Also, ive read many articles about why people dont text back and I really dont fit into either of them
loveweary11 Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 If I end up going on a date from online , and the conversation is decent, I cant help but take it personally when the guy doesnt text back. Did they think I was fat ? Did I ask too many questions about their hobbies and life? Even though others will text back, i always focus on the ones that dont and wonder what I did wrong. Any tips on how to not be so hard on yourself. Also, ive read many articles about why people dont text back and I really dont fit into either of them You just have to force yourself to stop caring. To literally forget the one that rejected you and move right to the next one. Don't analyze it. It might not even be you. Maybe he's a gay guy seeing if he can convert.... or a married guy who can't go through with it. You'll never know the reason, so let it go... 4
Popsicle Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 There could be a million reasons, some of which may have nothing to do with you. It's best to be kind to yourself and don't assume the worst.
Gaeta Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 Did they think I was fat ? Did I ask too many questions about their hobbies and life? Next time instead of thinking he might have thought you were not good enough just switch it around and tell yourself. *He obviously realized I was too good for him*
candie13 Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 it's online dating. Much better to get no text back than to have a date ask you out 3 times in a row and just expect sex and vanish when he's not getting any. OLD is not for the faint of heart. Sometimes you don't hear from them after date 1. Other times after date 5. Other times they enjoy playing mind games. Most of the times it's because they met someone else. Sorry to hear you're overthinking this, but actually, it's good practice. Don't overinvest. Keep it short. And have other guys chatting you up. By the time you set up your next date, you would have completely forgotten about him . Get ready, loads of weirdos out there, hehehe 2
Popsicle Posted August 15, 2015 Posted August 15, 2015 Just last week, I quit OLD altogether, even though I only went out with 2 guys (lol). It's better for me not to be on there and meet men in more organic ways. 1
Author cookiemonster26 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Posted August 16, 2015 Just last week, I quit OLD altogether, even though I only went out with 2 guys (lol). It's better for me not to be on there and meet men in more organic ways. How does one meet guys organically nowadays anyways?
Popsicle Posted August 16, 2015 Posted August 16, 2015 How does one meet guys organically nowadays anyways? Any other way except OLD.
oberkeat Posted August 16, 2015 Posted August 16, 2015 (edited) After dates with six or seven women I met online went nowhere, plus several flakes, I got to the point where I was just going through the motions. I wasn't putting any effort into first messages anymore and deep down I just dreaded going on another date because I knew the person would probably just flake. I wasn't looking forward to meeting people . I had had enough and deleted my profiles. For me OLD was toxic. It was making me a cynical, bitter person. Edited August 16, 2015 by oberkeat
Author cookiemonster26 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Posted August 16, 2015 Any other way except OLD. Be more specific? I work with all women and my friends dont hve any guy friends, so im kind of stuck on where else to meet guys
Author cookiemonster26 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Posted August 16, 2015 After dates with six or seven women I met online went nowhere, plus several flakes, I got to the point where I was just going through the motions. I wasn't putting any effort into first messages anymore and deep down I just dreaded going on another date because I knew the person would probably just flake. I wasn't looking forward to meeting people . I had had enough and deleted my profiles. For me OLD was toxic. It was making me a cynical, bitter person. I feel like this is happening to me, problem is i never meet people in real life, i work with all women and none of my girlfriends have guy friends
oberkeat Posted August 16, 2015 Posted August 16, 2015 I feel like this is happening to me, problem is i never meet people in real life, i work with all women and none of my girlfriends have guy friends I'm in a similar situation. I work with all elderly women, and my friends are all married and don't know any single girls. You could try the gym. That's where I spend much of my time outside work, and I'd love to meet girls there.
Popsicle Posted August 16, 2015 Posted August 16, 2015 Be more specific? I work with all women and my friends dont hve any guy friends, so im kind of stuck on where else to meet guys I'm not a dating coach!
Author cookiemonster26 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Posted August 16, 2015 I'm not a dating coach! How does that have anything to do with being a dating coach? I jusr asked where you meet guys other than online
Author cookiemonster26 Posted August 16, 2015 Author Posted August 16, 2015 I'm in a similar situation. I work with all elderly women, and my friends are all married and don't know any single girls. You could try the gym. That's where I spend much of my time outside work, and I'd love to meet girls there. Have you ever tried online dating or was it not for you?
h0000 Posted August 16, 2015 Posted August 16, 2015 I am not sure how "quit online dating" can solve the problem of "taking things personally", as if in real life you would never get people ignoring you, rejecting you, turning you down? The reason they don't text you back,could very well be very personal. Maybe they really think you are fat. But, so what? Why do you care about a stranger's opinion/validation? Why do you need every guy to be interested in you and text you back? (it won't happen by the way) Confidence, or self-esteem, comes from inside. 1
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