dreyrose Posted August 13, 2015 Posted August 13, 2015 we lived together for almost 3 yrs, though i was in love with her,the feeling wasnt mutual coz she was pinning for someone else. i know that and accepted it anyway. though the girl is already married i know they still are communicating with each other. as far as i know the girl was having marital problems with her husband. early this year, the girl came back. and she left me for her. saying that she is chosing her over me. it broke my heart. and i have no choice but to let go. 3 months after, she started contacting me through her cousin. though i tried to stay away from her she persisted. for old time sake i meet up with her. she told me that the girl left but will be coming back after she divorce her husband. and that she wanted to see me but secretly. i cant believe what she asked of me, i felt so cheap as if i dont matter to her. its been a month since we started seeing each other secretly, and honestly i feel like ****. i hate being with her thinking that shes only doing this because the other one is not here. though i still feel something for her, im starting to hate her. how can she just dump me and after that just come back as if nothing happened. and have the guts to bluntly shove it to my face. can please somebody tell me how to really stay away from her and keep it. everyday shes breaking my heart. and im about to hate myself as well.
sandylee1 Posted August 13, 2015 Posted August 13, 2015 Stop allowing her to use you like this. She's made it clear that you are just a stop gap until the other girl is fully available. Send a NC text now. You make it clear you don't want anything more to do with here and she should not contact you again. People treat you badly , because you let them. Get firm and get some self respect and don't let it happen.
SammySammy Posted August 13, 2015 Posted August 13, 2015 She's very selfish and disrespectful. I wouldn't allow her to treat me that way.
qubist Posted August 13, 2015 Posted August 13, 2015 we lived together for almost 3 yrs, though i was in love with her,the feeling wasnt mutual coz she was pinning for someone else. i know that and accepted it anyway. though the girl is already married i know they still are communicating with each other. as far as i know the girl was having marital problems with her husband. early this year, the girl came back. and she left me for her. saying that she is chosing her over me. it broke my heart. and i have no choice but to let go. 3 months after, she started contacting me through her cousin. though i tried to stay away from her she persisted. for old time sake i meet up with her. she told me that the girl left but will be coming back after she divorce her husband. and that she wanted to see me but secretly. i cant believe what she asked of me, i felt so cheap as if i dont matter to her. its been a month since we started seeing each other secretly, and honestly i feel like ****. i hate being with her thinking that shes only doing this because the other one is not here. though i still feel something for her, im starting to hate her. how can she just dump me and after that just come back as if nothing happened. and have the guts to bluntly shove it to my face. can please somebody tell me how to really stay away from her and keep it. everyday shes breaking my heart. and im about to hate myself as well. this not new or strange , in fact this is very common behavior and it relays in 3 factors 1-her selfishness, 2- her confusion, 3-your weakness toward her. like said this is very common, lots women do that when are confused about love and feel that they miss something then another "option" come along they just go for it if with selfishness and some sort of narcissism. knowing that you have a softy spot in your heart for her so she believes that she can put you on the shelve as a back up while exploring other options that may appear more intriguing. you know what happens to most of these women? the end up loosing both relationships. whether you want to end it with her for good or hope for a second chance is up to you but there are a must go through path to each decision . understand that you are on the shelve right now the only reason she is back is the OG went away. if you want to end it, which is highly recommended since you are not married and have no shared responsibilities, you should be firm let her know the decision ask her to never contact you then go NC, there is thread here in this forum that can help you and give you tips about NC. but if you think it is worth another try, you will have to make it clear that you are not a second option she will have to commit to you as the only option and end her R with the girl refer her to the NC thread so she would follow that, then work on improving your R which is a hard work to do for both of you.
OnlyBelieve Posted August 13, 2015 Posted August 13, 2015 I am sorry that you are hurting. I just wanted to tell you that you are valuable and to remember that. Remember who you are.
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