Author Gaeta Posted August 11, 2015 Author Posted August 11, 2015 I made a profile on pof the day before (it's already deleted). I saw him on there and made a comment : How sad is it we're both still on here eh! He replied 'how you're doing' blahblah I ended it with If you want to do something like a terrace or movie think of me. OR, you can tell me to get lost that's good too :-) Than he replied what's in my original post. This morning I told him I was deleting my profile, I cannot stand one more minute of pof and left my number.
rester Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 (edited) He may think she's like many women (and men too), in between relationships and bored, looking up old boyfriends and seeing who will bite. Unfortunately, OP, this is exactly what I would think. Depending on how the original dating period went, I may also think you were after sex and nothing more. I think this guy has a right to be cautious if he was interested in a relationship with you. On the other hand, if he wanted sex I would think he would use your invitation to make a date. Edited to add: why not set a date and time and make it easy for him? If I were him I would not be pursuing you after you broke it off to begin with. Edited August 11, 2015 by rester
angel.eyes Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Ambiguous questions get ambiguous responses . . . that being said, if this guy was smart and/or actually interested, he would have responded with specificity. That was exactly my point. If he were genuinely interested, he would have jumped on your reaching out and given you a specific timeframe. But he isn't really interested. So instead he responded with non-committal conditional language and a vague some day. Take a break and then focus on new people. I wouldn't revisit former dates.
kendahke Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Of course, the way to find out for sure is to call him, tell him what day and time you'd like to meet him. If he says "great! See you then", then cool. Even if he says "I can't that day, how about x day at x time?", that's encouraging. If he stay "oooh, I'm busy. I'll have to see when I can.." then hang up on him and never call him again. He's not interested and doesn't have the stones to tell you he's not interested. He's expecting you to figure that out.
Author Gaeta Posted August 11, 2015 Author Posted August 11, 2015 Unfortunately, OP, this is exactly what I would think. Depending on how the original dating period went, I may also think you were after sex and nothing more. I think this guy has a right to be cautious if he was interested in a relationship with you. On the other hand, if he wanted sex I would think he would use your invitation to make a date. Edited to add: why not set a date and time and make it easy for him? If I were him I would not be pursuing you after you broke it off to begin with. Believe it or not him and I never had sex I don't think he saw my approach as looking for sex. He's a good judge or character. I am sure he knows it's best to not get involved with me that I may just up and go in a couple of months like I did before.
rester Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Believe it or not him and I never had sex I don't think he saw my approach as looking for sex. He's a good judge or character. I am sure he knows it's best to not get involved with me that I may just up and go in a couple of months like I did before. Okay, that's different. That's what I meant by "depending how the original dating period went." I would agree that if you haven't had sex that he wouldn't think you are just after that now. I do still think it was up to you to pick a time and place. You are giving off the impression that you want him to chase you after you've already rejected him. I'd feel like a sucker in that position. 1
xcupid Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 I ended it with If you want to do something like a terrace or movie think of me. OR, you can tell me to get lost that's good too :-) Than he replied what's in my original post. This morning I told him I was deleting my profile, I cannot stand one more minute of pof and left my number. Your "invitation" was too open ended. Should have been specific. His reply in turn is open ended. He seems lukewarm at best - not jumping in and suggesting anything concrete. Go back to him with a *specific* invitation and see how he replies. If you get the "too busy right now" response you'll know things haven't changed. If he's interested he'll bite. 1
VengeanceGuidesMe Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Seems kind of like "Well, she got ditched by someone else and now needs an ego boost. She can reap what she sows".. but I'm a very proud and egotistical person. Might not be how he feels.
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