seixal Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Hello, I recently realized that Over the past couple of years I developed an interest in Asian girls I. I think they are very feminine and good-looking. Probably I find them exotic too, there is a large Asian community where I live in Southern California. Now this doesn't mean that I'm attracted to every single girl with slanted eyes. While I think Asian girls are attractive overall, I obviously don't think every single one of them is hot and I am attracted to white girls too. After doing some research online, I could quickly realize how White men are shamed, belittled, ridiculed for being attracted to Asian women. Do you think it's bad or racist to be attracted to Asian girls?
JC4 Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Everybody has their own unique set of things they find attractive, why do you feel like the traits you happen to find desirable are somehow "wrong"? I think the type of woman you are attracted to is not a problem, but the fact that you are worrying about this itself may be something to reflect on! 1
Clarence_Boddicker Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Only if you're poor. No money, no honey. Of course not. People are people. There's good & bad in all races & cultures.
Zagan Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Why would it be racist to be attracted to Asian girls? That's a weird thought. Lots of Asian women are good looking, and a lot of western men are attracted to Asian women because they are supposed to be a representation of subservient women because of their culture. That's not why all western men are attracted to them of course, but there is a stereotype, especially because a good portion of mail order brides are Asian, exactly for that reason. There are attractive people of all races. You're just like everybody else on the planet.. You have a type. 2
Candygirljane Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 (edited) Only if you're poor. No money, no honey. Of course not. People are people. There's good & bad in all races & cultures. Wow it really hurts, who said there are no good-looking quality Asian women in the world? of course they are not attracted to poor white men :/ Maybe I'm just too sensitive about racist Edited August 8, 2015 by Candygirljane
mrldii Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 ...Do you think it's bad or racist to be attracted to Asian girls? Absolutely not, OP. We are attracted to what it is we are attracted to...period. It used to bother me when I'd see white men with Asian girls, as I assumed it was because they were buying into the stereotype that all Asian women are submissive and do as their men please. A guy I once dated assured me that in his ample experience, if a man goes into it with THAT stereotype as the basis for his attraction, he will probably more often than not be extremely disappointed. Apparently, Asian women are well-schooled at how to make a man "p*ssy-whipped"...the very thing most men buying into the stereotype are trying to avoid. "Just desserts", I'd say!
elaine567 Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Absolutely not, OP. We are attracted to what it is we are attracted to...period. It used to bother me when I'd see white men with Asian girls, as I assumed it was because they were buying into the stereotype that all Asian women are submissive and do as their men please. A guy I once dated assured me that in his ample experience, if a man goes into it with THAT stereotype as the basis for his attraction, he will probably more often than not be extremely disappointed. Apparently, Asian women are well-schooled at how to make a man "p*ssy-whipped"...the very thing most men buying into the stereotype are trying to avoid. "Just desserts", I'd say! The urban myth is that Asian women make better lovers than other women. and that Chinese women are far more sexually open-minded than Caucasian girls. I guess that fuels male interest...
Zagan Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Also there is a lot of porn which again represents Asian women as subservient/submissive sex objects eager to cater to your every sexual whim. I'm not suggesting that this is your attraction as people just have preferences that they are physically attracted to like brunettes, blondes etc... But if you are finding yourself attracted to Asian women for a particular motive, then viewing somebody as a sex object and not an individual who deserves to be known and liked for who they are rather than what they are, then yes, that is quite wrong. 4
LoveRefreshed Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Having dated a Japanese woman, their life philosophy is quite interesting. I like it. However, she wouldn't kiss me after I went down on her or let me touch her with the hand I fingered her with. She was afraid of her own vagina... very strange. Anyway, Urban myth or not, I think in general, most eastern societies are very patriarchal, so I think so men like women who may be a bit more subservient than westernized women.
mrldii Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Also there is a lot of porn which again represents Asian women as subservient/submissive sex objects eager to cater to your every sexual whim. I'm not suggesting that this is your attraction as people just have preferences that they are physically attracted to like brunettes, blondes etc... But if you are finding yourself attracted to Asian women for a particular motive, then viewing somebody as a sex object and not an individual who deserves to be known and liked for who they are rather than what they are, then yes, that is quite wrong. On a completely unrelated note (and with absolutely NO intention of hijacking this thread, but just an observation...) Am I the only woman on this site who has an ever-growing online virtual crush on this guy/person? 1
MovingOnIsHard Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Being Asian myself, I think westernized Asians are more or less like Caucasians in thinking and way of life. And a lot of Asian women i know are well to do and very successful in life... So I don't know why someone would feel belittled if they dated an Asian women (unless she was a legit gold digger ). I was raised by conservative, typical Asian parents. Education came first and I was taught to never sell myself short to a man, if anything I should maintain control and power over the relationship (so I'm definitely not passive/submissive haha). I myself believe in equality in a relationship though. 1
LoveRefreshed Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 I would say the Japanese girl I dated was not subservient, maybe a little submissive in some regards, but incredibly smart and wise. Her philosophy on life was fantastic. We still talk to this day, 12 years after our horrible break up (and 2 years of not talking). Anyway, like I tell yxalitis in all of his post. If you like an Asian woman, just make sure you like her for her, not because she's Asian. Asians, like americans, like Canadians, like anyone are not all the same. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. 2
Zagan Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 On a completely unrelated note (and with absolutely NO intention of hijacking this thread, but just an observation...) Am I the only woman on this site who has an ever-growing online virtual crush on this guy/person? ........ :o
Author seixal Posted August 8, 2015 Author Posted August 8, 2015 I would say the Japanese girl I dated was not subservient, maybe a little submissive in some regards, but incredibly smart and wise. Her philosophy on life was fantastic. We still talk to this day, 12 years after our horrible break up (and 2 years of not talking). Anyway, like I tell yxalitis in all of his post. If you like an Asian woman, just make sure you like her for her, not because she's Asian. Asians, like americans, like Canadians, like anyone are not all the same. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. Just as a disclaimer I am not at all expecting, nor attracted in submissive women, no matter the ethnicity. The responses on this thread illustrate how a white guy being attracted to Asian girls automatically triggers suspicions of "yellow fever", "viewing asian women as sexual objects", when what I appreciate in Asian women, at least in the US is that they are often more educated and achieving than their Hispanic, African American, or even White counterparts. Furthermore I find the "stay-at-home mum" concept unattractive and patriarchal and this is still very prevalent in American culture, no matter how "progressive" American view themselves>
mrldii Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 ...The responses on this thread illustrate how a white guy being attracted to Asian girls automatically triggers suspicions of "yellow fever", "viewing asian women as sexual objects"... A lot of posters must have me blocked then, because I haven't seen a single post that hasn't included words to the effect of "there's nothing wrong with it [unless the only reason someone is, is because of _____]". Dang it. I hate being blocked, right out of the gate, before having earned the right. 1
bubbaganoosh Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 If I met a girl and I was attracted to her, we got along and had what was needed to have a good relationship, the shape of her eyes, the color of her skin would have no bearing. I wouldn't care if she was a Klingon. My life, my needs and if someone doesn't like it or approve then it's their problem not mine.
scorpiogirl Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 I live in Asia and so I think I have an accurate view of this situation. It's not bad to be attracted to Asian women, but often men will have a skewed opinion on what they're really like and they buy into the stereotypes. So here is what I observe: ( And there are all sorts of Asians that have come to find work here) A lot of "Western" men here objectify the local women. In one forum, there was actually a thread about who had the hottest girlfriend and they all posted pictures. Many of the women here play the coy submissive woman very well. Some target foreigners in order to escape the regular duties that would be expected of them in a marriage with one of their own countrymen. Some women see having a foreigner as a status symbol. I don't know why. The men see thesewomen as hot, thin and sexy and a far better prospect than their fat, lazy, too independent Western women. ( their words). My former housemate, a local, told me she never dated a local man. She wanted a foreigner because she couldn't handle the traditional obligations that an Asian man and their respective families would impose on them. She's now waiting for her U.S. Visa. There is nothing subservient or submissive about these women. In my work, I encounter many businessmen who have been married for a while. ( every one has a mistress by the way. Every single one). They often say that the wife is the CEO of the household. They just live there. The foreigners that I work with who are married to locals are often quite unhappy. Because the moment the ring goes on the finger, the coy act goes out the window. I could write a book on this but I won't There's nothing wrong with being attracted to whatever it is you like. Just don't buy into the stereotypes. You'll be disappointed. 4
sandylee1 Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 Hello, I recently realized that Over the past couple of years I developed an interest in Asian girls I. I think they are very feminine and good-looking. Probably I find them exotic too, there is a large Asian community where I live in Southern California. Now this doesn't mean that I'm attracted to every single girl with slanted eyes. While I think Asian girls are attractive overall, I obviously don't think every single one of them is hot and I am attracted to white girls too. After doing some research online, I could quickly realize how White men are shamed, belittled, ridiculed for being attracted to Asian women. Do you think it's bad or racist to be attracted to Asian girls? It's not racist at all , however your comment about slanted eyes comes over as a bit ignorant and could be viewed as Racist. Asia is a big place and not all Asians have slanted eyes. Asia includes India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Malaysia and several other countries, none of them have the 'slanted eyes'. 2
mrldii Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 "Asia" also includes the larger part of Russia, so many Russians are "Asian", too. 1
Author seixal Posted August 8, 2015 Author Posted August 8, 2015 It's not racist at all , however your comment about slanted eyes comes over as a bit ignorant and could be viewed as Racist. Asia is a big place and not all Asians have slanted eyes. Asia includes India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Malaysia and several other countries, none of them have the 'slanted eyes'. You are right, I should have said "Far Eastern Asians", that would have been more racially/geographically correct. Now as far as me being racist or ignorant by using just "Asian", I think that's a little bit exaggerated, to say the least. In the US at least, when someone says "Asian" the first thing that comes to people's mind is an individual of Far Eastern Asian ancestry, not someone from the Indian subcontinent, for instance, despite being both geographically Asian. The same goes for African Americans, that everyone picture with black skin overlooking people of White South African, or North African ancestry. And the same goes for the people called Latinos that everyone picture with brown skin and Amerindian, when people living in the real Latium are White Europeans. These are all incorrect, imperfect categories that only make sense in the American context.
Author seixal Posted August 8, 2015 Author Posted August 8, 2015 "Asia" also includes the larger part of Russia, so many Russians are "Asian", too. That is true, most of Russia is located on the Asian continent, so many Russian are Asians and many of them have slanted eyes! 1
mrldii Posted August 8, 2015 Posted August 8, 2015 That is true, most of Russia is located on the Asian continent, so many Russian are Asians and many of them have slanted eyes! So, after you spent all that time explaining how you're not really racist, you came back making the one single comment that suggested you just might be, again?!? Interesting playing strategy... 1
Author seixal Posted August 8, 2015 Author Posted August 8, 2015 A lot of posters must have me blocked then, because I haven't seen a single post that hasn't included words to the effect of "there's nothing wrong with it [unless the only reason someone is, is because of _____]". Dang it. I hate being blocked, right out of the gate, before having earned the right. Actually many posters expressed qualified approvals, saying It's ok to like Asian girls BUT ONLY if you don't think they are submissive, sexual objects, Geishas, China dolls all this without even knowing or asking if those were my expectations. The truth is that when a white guy says "I'm into Hispanic girls" no one suspects them of having some weird fetiche, it's just viewed as personal preference.
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