Why do people catfish?

[fitnessfan365]

They talk and talk but never want to meet. I mean I just stop talking to them by post 4. I ask them out, if they ignore/say no with some excuse like "I'm not ready yet", then I drop them.

 

That isn't Catfishing. Catfishing is when the person you meet in person completely misrepresents who they are. Whether it's a man pretending to be a woman, a majorly obese woman pretending to be fit w-misleading pics and body type description, etc..

 

Someone who skates around meeting is simply a flake and nothing more. Unless they're doing it because they're misrepresenting themselves and are scared to meet. But even then you won't know for sure unless you actually see them.

[RoseVille]

That isn't catfishing. Catfishing is when a guy pretends to be a woman and leads guys on using false identity and photos of real hot chicks to lure them in.

 

No, it's not always a dude pretending to be a woman. Often it's just a far less attractive person of the same sex of the person they're impersonating.

 

Fantasy, poor self-esteem, tons of reasons they do this - per the show, anyway.

[Michelle ma Belle]

The best way to get a good understanding of what is a catfish is to watch the movie and/or MTV TV series Catfish if you haven't already.

 

There are many different types of catfish as some people have touched on already. It isn't just one style or one gender or one motive. There are countless versions but the the common denominator in ALL of them is misresprentation. Period.

 

Unfortunately most people don't realize they're being catfished until it's too late. And even more never really know for sure since catfish go to extreme lengths to protect their true identity.

 

The rule of thumb to smoke them out?

 

Set a date as soon as possible. There is absolutely no excuse why someone on OLD can't meet for a quick coffee. It's called a dating site for a reason.

 

If you meet someone online who is not living in or around your area, SKYPE! Technology is brilliant in it's ability to connect people from every corner of the universe. Anyone not willing to jump on cam to confirm their identity shouldn't be trusted.

 

Pics are worthless. It used to be that pictures confirmed all we needed but with reverse images search engines it's made it incredibly easy for anyone to do their own sleuthing. As a result, catfish have been forced to become very resourceful and have had to swap out their usual stock photos for real identities typically found on social media pages. What does that mean? It means if you were to drop those pics into reverse image search they would come up "clean" thus giving you a false sense of trust.

 

And finally, if there is ever a discussion or request for funds of any amount or bellyaching as a result of financial distress of any kind, RUN! Never EVER give money or account information or any of your personal details, and this is regardless if you've met them in real life or not. It should be obvious but I'm amazed how many people fall victim to these types of catfish

[guest569]

I have seen a bit of that tv show and it seemed like a lot of them just dont like themselves, want to be someone else, are ashamed, but want to live some sort of fantasy. So they pretend. I dont think they deliberately set out to hurt or trick people, perhaps they just dont seem to think it will go that far and just treat it like a game. I've only experienced this type of thing once with a guy who kept making excuses not to meet and eventually fessed up that he was married. I cant be sure of anything really, he could have been anyone. Only had one photo and it wasn't clear.Who knows,.

[jay1983]

I've seen it done where guys take pics of a very good looking guy and put them up just to see if that's what women are looking for. They start taking screen shots of their success and posting them on forums. At every turn, it was exactly what women online were looking for and debunked every excuse to why women ignored men online.

[Michelle ma Belle]

It goes both ways Jay.

 

Most of the stories on MTV's Catfish are women doing that exact same thing. In essence, they're living vicarious through these fake profiles of beautiful women and the attention it gets them. Some catfish are "innocent" while others have more sinister motives.

 

It's sad to think about how much time and energy they spend being anything other than themselves.

[LoveRefreshed]

I have never seen the TV show catfish. It was a term I picked up here in LS forums and I wasn't even clear on what it really meant. Just that someone wasn't going to meet you is all I got from context.

 

It makes more sense now though, after reading all the different situations.

 

 

Typically I ask for a date within a few messages. I also don't really like to hand out my Skype, but recently made a new Skype account solely for this (Read below). If they ignore the part about meeting up, then I just stop talking to them (for instance, one girl, I wrote a couple things and was "Do you want to get a beer downtown this weekend", to which she ignored that part completely, so on the next message I wished her luck on OKC then went NC).

 

 

I wonder if that is why a few girls seem very interested up until the point I ask them for a phone number or a meeting. So strange. Thanks for the input everyone.

 

 

on an aside about the Skype, be vigilant:

 

 

 

I use my Skype professionally, and I had used it to call people abroad, so there is financial things tied to my Skype as well as personal and professional connections. Skype is notoriously vulnerable. For instance, I believe the latest method is that if you have someone's email account that is tied to the Skype account, it's game over.

 

 

All the person needs to do is create a new account with that e-mail. Then, you reset the password via the Skype program and it resets passwords for all accounts with that e-mail address. Then you just log in with their account, and change the info so they lose control. If you have credit cards tied to the account, that info is theirs. All of your contacts are subjected to being phished by your account as well.

[sweeeeetie82]

Some people are crazy!!! Why pretend to be someone else, and to stalk profiles, pictures , someone else's life completely is absurd to say the least. Wow...talk about having too much time in your hands and hurting people along the way.

 

Skype or proof pic with a date on it. Problem solved.

[jen1447]

You have to also keep in mind the interconnectivity of many things on the web today too. Being on Facebook forex doesn't just mean being on Facebook anymore.

 

A good example of this is I had a friend who I talked to on e-mail quite a bit, but bc she was in my mail contacts list, her e-mail associated with Skype, and even tho I didn't 'know' her on Skype, there she was, in my Skype contacts, with personal information published like her phone number and a picture of her dog as an avatar that she was never even aware she'd published.

 

Kinda creepy and insidious, and all just from putting yourself on modern social media.

[LoveRefreshed]

You have to also keep in mind the interconnectivity of many things on the web today too. Being on Facebook forex doesn't just mean being on Facebook anymore.

 

A good example of this is I had a friend who I talked to on e-mail quite a bit, but bc she was in my mail contacts list, her e-mail associated with Skype, and even tho I didn't 'know' her on Skype, there she was, in my Skype contacts, with personal information published like her phone number and a picture of her dog as an avatar that she was never even aware she'd published.

 

Kinda creepy and insidious, and all just from putting yourself on modern social media.

 

 

 

Yep, scary, sad and true how cavalier we've become with our privacy and protection. We should be much more vigilant and serious about online security.