What causes MM/MW's to feel like they are imprisioned in their M beyond their control

[unluckycharms]

Were I to speculate, however, I would guess that a man in that position - having an A, but still having sex with his BW - would be doing so so as not to arouse suspicion. Yes, technically that might be considered "using" - but if he's not enjoying it, and is fantasising about the OW while doing the BW, say, then it's probably closer to a mercy **** - and he's probably the one being used.

 

I'm pretty sure mine was just a horn dog and would get it from me, his wife, and whoever else was willing.

[Arieswoman]

unluckycharms,

 

I'm pretty sure mine was just a horn dog and would get it from me, his wife, and whoever else was willing.

 

hmmmm, not sure what I can say about that ^^

 

(Maybe you should change your username to luckycharms, as I am sure you are no longer connected to that guy?

 

I digress, so returning to corococo's post #74;

 

If a married man cheats (his choice),

 

he turns his marriage into an open arrangement without his wife's knowledge or consent - his choice

 

he robs his wife of her right of informed choice - his arbritary decision

 

he continues to have sex with his wife - his choice

 

if it's "pity sex" then he disrespects his wife and the mother of his children - his choice

 

he runs the risk of pregnancy ( no contraceptive is 100% safe ) - his choice

 

and he risks bringing another human being into the mix - his choice

 

so how is the name of sweet reason can anyone claim this man is being "used"?

 

(PS this is a fictitious person BTW and in the spirit of gender equality, the same remarks apply to cheating wives )

[unluckycharms]

unluckycharms,

 

 

 

hmmmm, not sure what I can say about that ^^

 

(Maybe you should change your username to luckycharms, as I am sure you are no longer connected to that guy?

 

I digress, so returning to corococo's post #74;

 

If a married man cheats (his choice),

 

he turns his marriage into an open arrangement without his wife's knowledge or consent - his choice

 

he robs his wife of her right of informed choice - his arbritary decision

 

he continues to have sex with his wife - his choice

 

if it's "pity sex" then he disrespects his wife and the mother of his children - his choice

 

he runs the risk of pregnancy ( no contraceptive is 100% safe ) - his choice

 

and he risks bringing another human being into the mix - his choice

 

so how is the name of sweet reason can anyone claim this man is being "used"?

 

(PS this is a fictitious person BTW and in the spirit of gender equality, the same remarks apply to cheating wives )

 

Haha, thanks to this forum (I'm in my 20s and too broke for therapy), he is out of my life except for the occasional relapse. I perhaps said it a bit too bluntly but my point was that the vast majority of cheating married men are not focused on anyone but themselves. It was very hard for me to get past my pride and ego and accept that I wasn't "special" to him, i.e. that he was doing this to his wife and whoever else would boost his ego, but if I hadn't come to face to face with that reality I'd probably still be sleeping with the idiot to try to prove to myself that I was worth it.