LoveRefreshed Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Obviously silence is a no, because it's easier to avoid things than to do the right thing. Oh, that and every man will go off the handle if he's rejected. So I've been told.
smackie9 Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Not every man but a lot of them will in someway make their disappointment known in a negative way, lash out, call you a bitch, say you led them on, used them, call you a whore, stuck up b itch.....or whine at you pathetically. Unless you are a woman, you won't have this experience the way we do.
kendahke Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 In relation to the above I guess ones reaction rather depends on the extent of ones dating choices, someone with many options is going to react differently to someone with virtually no options at all. Exactly. And you can't control if they're going to respond. You do what you do. If you get a response, great. If you don't, then move on. Risk, interesting choice of words, as someone involved in risk on a day to day basis I can tell you one risk I will be extremely reluctant to take again is dating. Its a cliché but risk and reward are interlinked, except for millions dating just leads to endless hurt and depression. Life has never and will never have a guarantee that it will unfold the way you think it should. You can mitigate risks by attempting to find people who like you in the hope you like them but the reality is as people we always want something better than we can get so that idea is never a viable one. It's the same as investing money. Sometimes the investment pays off well. Sometimes you take a powder. It's your choice to invest or not. I still think not answering is simply a function of having the inability to face people, its just easier to say nothing. History is full of major events that happened because people chose to walk away rather than say something. And you can think that all day long til times get better and it still doesn't mean the object of your interest is obligated to respond to you just because you feel this way. 1
kendahke Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Not every man but a lot of them will in someway make their disappointment known in a negative way, lash out, call you a bitch, say you led them on, used them, call you a whore, stuck up b itch.....or whine at you pathetically. Yep. I find all of that to be throwing some pathetic haymakers. If she's all of that, why did you even waste your time to begin with? What does that say about you, you know? ` 1
WomenWubber Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 "Why is silence a common "no" to a date?" Because it's the internet.
beach Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Any gal that wants a date will say yes right away. Any delay is a no answer. 1
ZA Dater Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Exactly. And you can't control if they're going to respond. You do what you do. If you get a response, great. If you don't, then move on. Its easier to move on if one has options...
DJOkawari Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 So everyone seems to agree that silence means a "no". I was talking to a female friend about this today and she (early 20's female) gave me three other reasons that are true for her: - online just doesn't feel serious/romantic/meaningful even if she wouldve given that guy a shot normally - sometimes you don't want to go on a date but also you don't want to reject someone aka you just don't know them well enough. - things come up, time passes, at a certain point it'd just be weird to respond...that's the nature of sending a fb message or something.
kendahke Posted August 7, 2015 Posted August 7, 2015 Its easier to move on if one has options... That's an excuse to be lazy. 1
Author JC4 Posted August 8, 2015 Author Posted August 8, 2015 (edited) - online just doesn't feel serious/romantic/meaningful even if she wouldve given that guy a shot normally See, this is a huge barrier for me online, because I also kind of don't like talking online. I don't like phone calls either. I'd way rather be face to face. So I think sometimes I ask for a date right out of the gate because I would really rather get to know the person face to face not through Facebook. And if a girl feels the way you describe then... Welp, it's a no-win for me even if we both dislike online. But then maybe it's too direct. Obviously the girl probably knows nothing about me at all, and given the awfulness I've seen described here I wouldn't blame her for not wanting to take a risk. So maybe I should just be more clear about that. Like, I don't really like talking online, lets meet up for coffee (or something public and safe) some time. Etc. But I guess this is kind of off topic. Edited August 8, 2015 by JC4
Recommended Posts