FringeZone Posted August 5, 2015 Posted August 5, 2015 I've been dating an awesome girl for about 7 months. When I first met her, there were some embarrassing things from my background - unemployed at some point and where I worked - so I made something up so I wouldn't be judged at the time. So over the course of the 7 months, there have been a variety of references to this fabricated history - and I never knew how to come clean. Well, she figured it out and went off saying she can't trust me - it was all in the past and doesn't affect her today - but it was the maintenance of the lie that's a problem, in particle because she didn't see it coming. I understand where she's coming from. At this point I feel devastated - sad that I hurt her, disappointed in myself. We're still chatting, but I know that this will weigh on things - I'm wondering if people have thoughts or experiences rebuilding trust. I'm also concerned about how this will change the flavor of our interactions...how should I approach this? To me it seems like a small thing - to her it clearly isn't, so I'm planning on giving her whatever space she needs, and being upfront and honest about it all...but how do I work towards getting things back to where they were? I realize it could take a while and that this may end the relationship...so I'm comfortable with that if need be (although it would be disappointing).
yxalitis Posted August 5, 2015 Posted August 5, 2015 Explain to her WHY you lied, and how you couldn't find the right time to tell her the truth. And in future, make a lie that is as close to the truth as possible, with a few factors altered. I lost a lot of money to my ex girlfriend supporting her debts in real estate becomes "I lost a lot of money investing in real estate with bad advice" Later, when tell her, you only have to untwist the details.
rocketman122 Posted August 5, 2015 Posted August 5, 2015 Explain to her WHY you lied, and how you couldn't find the right time to tell her the truth. And in future, make a lie that is as close to the truth as possible, with a few factors altered. I lost a lot of money to my ex girlfriend supporting her debts in real estate becomes "I lost a lot of money investing in real estate with bad advice" Later, when tell her, you only have to untwist the details. wow, youre a good liar
Recommended Posts