princessmuffintop Posted August 2, 2015 Posted August 2, 2015 I broke up with someone I was with on this past Wednesday. He was emotionally abusive, and it had to end. However, he has two kids that I got to know, for the limited times I got to see them every other weekend. And I don't know how this works. Or how it's supposed to work ... I love them and miss them, and I don't think I'll get to say goodbye to them. He has them this weekend, they're still there today. It's breaking my heart way more than ending the relationship with him. I don't know what to do. They've watched him go through many girlfriends in the past few years. Some of them women he's only dated a couple of times. And I've spent every other weekend with them as a family for the past four months. We were a family. Is it OK to see them, or to tell them they can talk to me whenever they want? Should I do the 30 days of no contact and see how I feel about it then? He's the type of guy with a history of finding a woman to get over the last woman, sometimes within days. He accuses me of breaking up our family. I'm at a complete loss. I have no idea what to do.
seasickpeeve Posted August 2, 2015 Posted August 2, 2015 My bf broke up with me. I have a son. We'd been together 4 years. My ex left it to me to decide what to do about telling my son and I decided it was best I tell him myself alone and my ex writes a short letter saying it was good getting to know him, the break up was nothing to do with him etc. I felt this was the best way as in person would be too upsetting for a child, a letter is something they can keep and reply to if they want. At first I wanted my ex to still see my son occasionally like at birthdays but I decided this gets too complicated in the end. Surprisingly my son took it very well in the end after I explained a few things and has accepted it even though he is sad. Endings are a part of life, it's not ideal but children have there ways of sorting that out in their own mind. Maybe you could talk to your ex about what he thinks would be best but keep in mind it's his job to sort this stuff out for his children. It's great that you care
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