moimeme Posted May 11, 2005 Posted May 11, 2005 when i called him he put me straight to his voicemail Huh? How could he do that? My phone will send a caller to voicemail when someone else is on the phone - including when someone else is leaving me a message. It's automatic.
tokyo Posted May 11, 2005 Posted May 11, 2005 I don't get it quite with the voicemail. So you assume he has caller id, saw you message and decided to avoid talking to you by sending you to his voicemail straight away? How do you know that he was not at home and that's why you were sent to the voicemail? Sorry, I have no clue with the voicemails....
Author blackchild Posted May 11, 2005 Author Posted May 11, 2005 i called when i knew that he got off work and i guess he saw my name on th e caller ID and decided to put through to his voicemail. either way he did not return my call and i haven't spoken to him since the night he stood me up. I saw him today as i was leaving the mall and all that little bastard could do was smile and ride slowly passed my car. I couldn't even look at him so i put my head down. i know he saw me because my windows aren't tinted and you can see straight through my windshield! i hated seeing him today! The worst thing about it is that he didn't even blow his horn or call me to let me know that he saw me! whatever. I must have had my bitchy look on my face today ( some times i have that on without knowing). i don't know but i hated seeing him! i hated the fact that i wanted to say something but i couldn't because i didn't want to look stupid. i already felt like a stalker seeing him on the road when i knew that he works right next to the mall. anyways you guys just pray for me because this guy has me hooked and i'm trying so hard to get over him! i don't know why but it's something about him that gives me butterflies everytime i see him and i've been knowing him for 3 months! if he wsn't such an a**h*** i would've thought that feeling was something God given and special! maybe it is and i just don't know, maybe i ran into him for a reason. i don't know i just need to live my life and stop worrying about how he feels about me. Because if i was special to him, he would've never done this to me. there's a part of me that just wants me to sit down and pour all of my feelings out to him but i don't want to seem weak or dependented on him because we only met in Feburary and he's not all that great because his wewe isn't all that big!
tokyo Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 blackchild, I think you got waterproof evidence that this guy is not boyfriend material. Stop any contact.
Author blackchild Posted May 12, 2005 Author Posted May 12, 2005 thanks kooky for having my back! it sucks that he wasn't the 1 because i thought that he was everything for me! you know? he was just around my height, he was going to school to be a doctor ( and i a lawyer) and he was polite and courteous! he has a bad habit of disappearing and reappearing! i don't know what i'm going to do if he comes back around.
scarlyjones Posted May 12, 2005 Posted May 12, 2005 Okay, yeah, this guy DOES sound like an A-hole, but,.....in his defense,....If someone asked me to "Kick it with their friends" Id would treat that like being invited to a cookout or something. If I show,...I show. Sounded like you werent asking him to ESCORT YOU out with these friends you were "Kicking" things with. SOunds more like you were just letting him know that this thing was happening and he can tag along if he likes.
Author blackchild Posted May 12, 2005 Author Posted May 12, 2005 true, you are right about what you said. lately everyone and their moma has been saying to cut this nigga lose! but i have feelings for this guy that is hard to shake off! i am this guy gives me butterflies everytime i see him and i've been knowing this guy for 3mos now! evryone has been saying that he doesn't like me(which might be right) but what i do not understand is the fact that i saw him earlier that night and when i saw him he came running up to me and he hugged me and pick me up and when he put me down he keep giving me kisses! (plus he had a boner down there) later that night he seemed distracted because of some drama that happened that i don't know nothing about. he tried to call me the next day but i wasn't home to pick up the phone. a part of me just wants to forget about all this and just hug him but there's two problems with this 1) i don't want to seem disparated or weakor embrass myself because he may not like me! 2) because he hasn't responded to my text when i told him that i was mad at him and he didn't answer my phone call when i called him 5 or 6 hours after sending that text. plus a big part of me wants to play hard to get because it makes the guy what you more, but instead he's playing hard to get and it's making me want him more! how can i play hard to get when he's playing hard to get?! scarey jones please tell me how to get my man without losing my self-respect
HotCaliGirl Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 Originally posted by blackchild how can i play hard to get when he's playing hard to get?! Well, you can't play hard to get if you keep calling and texting him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As hard as it is, wait for the next time for him to call or for you to see him. Don't get mad at him and definitely don't be all smiles because you're playing hard to get! and instead act indifferent! That will drive him crazy, like you don't care, then he'll start chasing you so hard you'll be on top of his little wewe before you know it!!!
Author blackchild Posted May 13, 2005 Author Posted May 13, 2005 ha ha! that's so funny how you ended that! girl i've been trying so hard to ignore him! You don't know how tempted i am to grab him by the throat and ask him why he's asking like that! yeah you're right. a part of me wants to throw the bait out there for him to grab it and when he does then acted like i don't care
HotCaliGirl Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 Well, don't take my advice 100%....maybe he's really into you and HE'S playing hard to get. Don't get all prideful and indifferent if your instinctss tell you not to. Maybe you have to be persistent, if he's hot and has a list of girls after him. Guys are immature for a long time so maybe you have to follow the rules of his game to get to his heart. Maybe you could send him cute text messages every night, in a way that you don't expect him to respond but he'll know you're thinking of him and it'll get him to think of you every night. Then if you don't send one, he'll be wondering why...just get creative! That would be a great match - a doctor and a lawyer...
Author blackchild Posted May 13, 2005 Author Posted May 13, 2005 thanks girl! i just hope that persistent doesn't turn into stalking but yeah i'll be cute with it! plus you know he's hot if he has a tiny boner but i still want him!
noname Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 Originally posted by blackchild plus a big part of me wants to play hard to get because it makes the guy what you more, but instead he's playing hard to get and it's making me want him more! just for the record. that is one of the biggest misconceptions ever. most guys i know , including myself can't stand that crap. it may seem like they do because they play along with what they think the woman wants, and simply because most guys are just persistant and don't give up until they get what they want. personally, it is one of my biggest turnoffs. i do not like games and i waste no energy on a woman that hides what she really wants behind false pretense. many men prefer a woman that clearly shows what she wants. tell the guy how you feel. if it is good for the both of you, it'll work out. if not, then you can move on. contrary to popular belief, honesty works. it gives clarity and saves emotional energy that you need for other things. wouldn't you rather speak to this guy and find out what is going on than to keep playing this guessing game? and there are plenty of other men in the world who can give you butterflies...
HotCaliGirl Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 It will be a waste of time for her to talk that candidly to him since he won't be giving her any straight answers. He is big-time player, HE'S the one who has been playing games with her, stood her up and all that crap so since she likes him too much to walk away, I suggest she has nothing to lose by playing games right back at him, otherwise he's just going to tell her what she wants to hear. Yes, they do work though, maybe not with you and your friends, but with most men around the world, unfortunately (or fortunately!). I bet it would work with you too and you just hate the fact that you can be conned/played/tricked into being with someone.
scarlyjones Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 I agree ......................seriously,.........how can we expect a guy to hang around or get upset when he doesnt when, the whole time,...we were acting like we didnt care or even noticed him? Games screw things up.
scarlyjones Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 by the way,.......how would you know what works with guys from AROUND THE WORLD? That sounds like a general statement based on NOTHING.
noname Posted May 13, 2005 Posted May 13, 2005 Originally posted by HotCaliGirl It will be a waste of time for her to talk that candidly to him since he won't be giving her any straight answers. He is big-time player, HE'S the one who has been playing games with her, stood her up and all that crap so since she likes him too much to walk away, I suggest she has nothing to lose by playing games right back at him, otherwise he's just going to tell her what she wants to hear. Yes, they do work though, maybe not with you and your friends, but with most men around the world, unfortunately (or fortunately!). I bet it would work with you too and you just hate the fact that you can be conned/played/tricked into being with someone. ok, she doesn't know what his answers are because she hasn't gotten any yet. actually, it doesn't matter what he says to her. because she will be free to move on if she doesn't hear what she wants to hear. she has plenty to lose. emotional energy is not that easy to come by. once it is spent, it is gone. and if you spend that much energy playing games with someone who you know doesn't matter, you are wasting time and energy that you could be devoting to something or someone real.
Author blackchild Posted May 14, 2005 Author Posted May 14, 2005 thanks you guys for the great advice. i appreciate your help greatly, but it seems to me that you guys are about to fight over which advice is the best! overall this guy is an a**h***! i am a smart girl with a pretty face and a beautiful personality , any guy who sees this and decides to pass this up is stupid! I tried to make excuses for him: "oh it's because i don't put out", "he just wants to consider his other options", "he's intimidated by my looks, and the fact that he's filipino and i'm black", but all in all he's just an a**h*** and there's no explaining that! he got caught up in a beautiful black woman and now he thinks he's the **** and that he can sweep up any woman in the city! So now he wants to make me his rebound chick and whenever he believes that he can't get no better than this he comes to me. WHATEVER! i am never the rebound chick! and i refuse to stand for that! i'm the girl who dismisses the guy not the dismissed! i know this sounds funny but for some reason i believe that he's going to come back and when he does i'm going to string him along like the dog he is and drop his sorry ass!
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