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imagine if we take a person with love needs not met, and place him in another world, a perfect replica of his existing one, but with the only difference that no one in the new planet loves anyone there (neither hates), all the interactions are mutual trades with a selfish focus underlying everything.

 

the question is, will that same person be less crippled in his love lacking situation?.

 

in other words, is it the contrast, the inferiority , that sparks envy, etc. and ends up becoming an indicator of the persons degree of value, which spirals into a need for love to fill that void and bring an equality in this persons overall sense of worth?.

 

obviously this question is geared towards the adult position , as children are physically vulnerable and need to attract protection and care.

 

my belief is that our planet is actually very close to this, (no one loves anyone, (neither hates), all the interactions are mutual trades with a selfish focus underlying everything.)

 

i believe there is very rational evidence to this, for example, if the very same person inside and out, would be your neighbor's child instead of yours, it wouldn't even dawn on you there is something exceptionally triggering and charming in this human.

 

another point,

 

one cannot love something they don't feel. if you eat the chocolate ,you could love it, if someone else eats it, and you never had and never will have access to chocolate, there is no network between you and the food, to establish a communication of flowing emotion and activation of sense,

 

if you have never seen a girl in your life, there will be zero passion ,emotion, care, etc.

it is only when the girl comes into sight, triggers your sensations active, that you begin loving what you sense, not what she is, as there is no way on earth to participate in another humans experience ,(if she eats chocolate and you don't know anything about chocolate and it's effects, there is no way you will participate in the pleasure she experiences)

 

the evidence goes on and on a and on,

 

when we say we love someone or something .we express our self love and "appreciation to the cause and source of our pleasures and relief " ,

 

when we care for that source, we care for ourselves, just like conservationists do, when a parent sacrifices her life for the child, (other then the possible contribution of pure instinct not controlled by the logic of the mother) she sacrifices a small price of dying, for the much more exorbitant price of living a life with endless guilt, torment ,etc.

 

when we show sympathy and pity to the poor and unfortunate, we are occupied, rebuilding our disturbed comfort zone which was invaded, and threatened by fear and pain in ourselves, provoked by the gruesome expression of human suffering we encountered.

 

 

given that you agree somewhat to the above , i assume that processing the info by itself , should relieve the agony of loneliness, and lessen our dependence on outside love.

 

i also assume, that given the reality of all the side benefits, "care", and well being that comes, with being loved by a capable person, the envy and sense of inferiority, will remain extremely powerful, despite all the logical reasoning about love and it's deception,

 

my plea to you is, to help find an attachment to the truth about love, it could be anything, ranging from additional ideas, exercise, (preferably a formula of physical, mental and emotional exercises combined in one activity) a religion like culture, designed to compliment the missing energy in the purely rational message above.

 

 

from the lad priding himself in describing true selflessness as a disease, and what we consider a virtue, someone with the ability to channel his natural selfishness, into a win win situation where the world benefits from him alongside with him.

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