JaneyJ1991 Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 (edited) This might sound kind of odd. Does anyone else notice that birth order plays a big part in the people they date? I'm a stereotypical oldest child--Ambitious, bossy, overachiever, generally driven, over planner, a bit of a control freak and perfectionist. I'm not as confident as most firstborns, however. The last guy I dated was a youngest child--and an only boy--he needed to be the center of attention, catered to, and didn't really have much drive to do anything. While that generally made him easy going, it made him not very thorough, and not at all a perfectionist. Example: We were taking a day trip, and while I was running around getting things ready, he was just waiting and incessitantly texting to see if I was on the way to pick him up yet. Instead of looking up directions for me, calling the ranger district I needed him to call to check conditions, checking gas prices and traffic jams along the route, buying ice, etc, he was standing in his garage. Waiting. Once IN the car, I told him I needed to get gas, and to please look up the cheapest gas prices (gave him the website I use, it's a small town, and I needed him to do this efficiently). He literally could not manage. It drove me nuts because I felt like I was babysitting a toddler, while trying to drive, and eventually giving up and just picking a gas station because I couldn't google and drive safely at the same time in traffic. I notice that the men I've generally been the most frustrated by, have been youngest children. I notice a pattern that the guys I've been most impressed have almost ALL been oldest children--These guys have usually been driven, thorough, planners, been on a schedule, set a time, or opened doors for me, and weren't content to just "sit back and watch what happens". But I also notice that eventually, a clash of wills usually happens--firstborn vs. firstborn--we both want our own ways, and have our own specific method for how things should be done. And this can lead to friction. I've only dated one middle child. And I haven't known many only children. The point of my post? I find I'm most attracted to men who are oldest children. But I worry it leads to problems in the long run due to me also being an oldest. Technically, according to everything I've read, I SHOULD get along best in a relationship with a youngest. But that seems not to be the case. Does anyone else notice birth order having some say in their dating lives? Edited July 31, 2015 by JaneyJ1991
Vercetti Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 Same,,,only child or youngist endless children that drove me nuts. Never want to deal with an adult that cries about what's fair or wants something but can never decide on anything
guest569 Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 (edited) No, can't say I have. My exes were youngest and middle both very confident and ambitious etc as am I. This stuff is all bs if you ask me. Depends on the individual. I know some eldest and middle children who never got thwir stuff together Edited July 31, 2015 by smiley1
casey.lives Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 As a little one i was a middle child. As a middle child i was the friendliest and the most in tune with my siblings. From 8 and onward, i was raised as the baby.. until 16. In this baby phase, i was the touchy-feely one and my sister was my fathers companion and confidant. Then, my older sister left to be with her boyfriend, and that's when i became driven and i achieved to the best of my abilities and available resources.. plus school started getting interesting and the independence money gave me a desire to want more. From 16- 23.. i was an only child so i feel like i've been in every shoe. And as an only child, i rebel and i was demanding, but i wanted to forge my own path to self realization. In other words, i was self centered. How has that shaped me today.. im unpredictable. I think who im relating to .. determines the outcome.
nadine5 Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 Interesting subject... I'm the oldest, and all of my boyfriends have been the youngest, middle, or the only. I've never had an oldest boyfriend. Hm. Weird. I never have thought about it before. I have noticed the only children are very whiny. (Same goes for my best girl friend.)
wb1988 Posted July 31, 2015 Posted July 31, 2015 The first part you wrote made a lot of sense, actually I thought you were a guy before I got to the "last guy I dated" part. As you know, when you're the oldest you are expected to be responsible, make good decisions, mature and achieve the most (even if you're 1 year old your still expected to make way more!). These things don't make a woman more attractive but they obviously would make a man more attractive. You should definitely try dating an oldest son, but then again you'd seem super creepy if specifically looked for it in a guy.
mrldii Posted August 1, 2015 Posted August 1, 2015 I've never noticed it, but your OP made me take a look; I'm the the baby (G) of two, with an older brother(B). My serious relationships were: oldest B of 3 Bs; youngest with 3 Gs ahead of him; G, my B, G, B 5th of 6Bs in a row and then with 2 more Gs. The men I've been serious with have been all over the board as far as birth order/family composition; I adored them all for different reasons and broke up with 'em all for different reasons. No rhyme nor reason to any of it. Cool exercise though, OP!!!
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