titipornstar Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 My ex broke up with me 6 months ago and i went through utter hell, so bad i would describe it as meeting the devil... we were together 4 years and engaged. She more or less left me for someone at work after our relationship got rocky. I met up with an old friend last night who happens to work with her who tells me that one night on a drunked work night she admitted to colleagues she regretted the break up. Also my friend says she looks miserable at work and dosent seem happy with the new guy. Ive since met someone new but its been a battle to suppress my feelings for my ex who without a doubt is the person I've ever felt the biggest love for. Im mid 30's she's 27. About a month ago she phoned me a couple of times but i didn't answer as had implemented no contact. I cant fight my feelings much onger and this new info makes me want to get in touch, i cant help but think that just maybe me being with someone new has perhaps stopped her getting in touch.
Chi townD Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 Dude, she made a choice. She is the one that threw away 4 years for someone she just met. She put more of a value on this new guy over you that she kicked you to the curb to be with him. She ran to someone else's arm's when things got tough. Now, what about this new girl your with. Does she treat you right? Does she respect you as much as you respect her? If you can't commit 100% of yourself to a relationship, then maybe you shouldn't be in one. That's not being fair to yourself and certainly not to the girl you're dating. Now, if your Ex made a mistake, well that's a mistake she'll have to live with because you don't have to. 3
Author titipornstar Posted July 28, 2015 Author Posted July 28, 2015 The new girl ticks all the boxes my ex didn't, she's loyal, classier, healthier! (my ex suffered from an eating disorder) dresses better and is more mature She's a catch, and the only reason i jumped into a new relationship so quickly... surely i couldn't let a girl like this pass me by... I'm trying to convince myself that sticking with her and with time i will forget my ex Past 2 months I've been fine and happy, then bam! a week of constantly missing her! I know she broke up with me but what if like my friend says she's regretting the decision, and won't approach me. But then again how could i go back to her?! She's done this before I took her back and she broke my heart again. I guess I'm a love fool because i still adore her
elaine567 Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 OK your ex, out in the big bad world is having a bad time with her new bf, decides to split with him or he dumps her, but a week later starts up with some great guy called Mike who she had her eye on, life is wonderful again, Mike is fantastic. Meanwhile you have split with Miss Perfect, as you want to try again. Er... no. Ex: Sorry your relationship didn't work out titipornstar, let's just be friends. You should come and meet Mike sometime. SHE ended it last time, just let sleeping dog's lie. DO NOT go there. 1
Lorenza Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 I'd say don't contact her back. She left you with a hope of something better out there for her and when she found out that it wasn't what she expected it to be, she naturally looks back to you, hoping that you still have feelings for her which would certainly comfort her. In my opinion, she might be seeking contact with you just to find reassuring just cause she feels bad in her current relation and not honestly regretting her decision and wanting you back... 1
Chi townD Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 You have an Ex that has a lot of problems. Has ditched you before for someone else. She wanted to come back. So, you took her back and she ditched you AGAIN to try someone else. Is that about right? In the meantime, you found a girl that is classy, dresses nicely, treats you right and is mature (therefore, doesn't play games) and is loyal. Gee, which one would I go for? Hmmm..... Dude, you might adore your Ex, but she doesn't adore you. Her track record is showing that she likes to kick it with you until the next guy comes along that tickles her fancy and you're back to the curb again. If I were you, I would appreciate what I have in this new girl and take her away for a weekend at a romantic B&B. Lord knows she deserves it.
Learningtowalkagain Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 The new girl ticks all the boxes my ex didn't, she's loyal, classier, healthier! (my ex suffered from an eating disorder) dresses better and is more mature She's a catch, and the only reason i jumped into a new relationship so quickly... surely i couldn't let a girl like this pass me by... I'm trying to convince myself that sticking with her and with time i will forget my ex Past 2 months I've been fine and happy, then bam! a week of constantly missing her! I know she broke up with me but what if like my friend says she's regretting the decision, and won't approach me. But then again how could i go back to her?! She's done this before I took her back and she broke my heart again. I guess I'm a love fool because i still adore her Pretty easy choice, stick with the girl you're with now. This is a no brainer. Unless you crave drama and all that crap by all means break up with the girl you're with now who makes you happy and you can trust for a girl who cheated on you and put so little value on 4 years of your relationship.
Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 I'm kind of in the same boat...my ex - fiancé dumped me for another guy after 5 years and moved in with him immediately. I saw her for the first time in 3 1/2 months last weekend and she wasn't the girl I remember. No makeup, hair and nails hadn't been done and she was ignoring everyone and had her nose buried in her phone. I'm not sure if she's happy or not, but when iI talked to her she had a lot of complaints about her situation. I don'tthink she's at the regretting stage yet, but it doesn't matter. She made her choice and left me. She doesn't deserve a second chance as far as I'm concerned. It sounds like you have a great gf now. Focus on her (and yourself) and don't blow it. It's a good thing that you found such a loyal, mature girl. 1
aloneinaz Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 It is amazing how so many threads on this site are about people missing lousy/abusive/terrible partners who kicked them to the curb, even when they are now with better partners. What is it about the human brain/experience that makes people struggle to get over them 100% vs. being grateful that they are free of the poor partner? It's very interesting to me that we do this, or have done this, myself included. 1
Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 I sometimes wonder if people actually want their ex back or if it's just human nature to not want to lose. Rejection always feels like a check in the loss column to me, and I hate to lose. Or, we're all just genetically crazy. :-) 2
anduina Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 Don't do it. Move on. She's not worth it. You were engaged and she threw it all away for a lark. You can't trust someone like that who doesn't take commitment seriously enough. 1
Author titipornstar Posted July 29, 2015 Author Posted July 29, 2015 Thanks guys when I'm in doubt ill always check up on this thread. You guys should check out coach corey wayne on youtube... amazing advice imo all about relationships 2
Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 You guys should check out coach corey wayne on youtube... amazing advice imo all about relationships Corey Wayne is awesome! He's pretty brutal but honest about why things happen and where you screwed up. lol 1
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