seagirl Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 As happy as I am about being a fairly new mother I think I am going through some sort of postpartum depression or something. How long is this supposed to last? My little boy is the absolute joy of my life but sometimes it is very hard to be happy about anything. My husband works 75 hours a week in order to keep me at home so I don't want to bother him with this, I don't want him to think he isn't doing enough. I have nobody to talk to that I can trust with something so personal, the family thrives on gossip. I don't know what else to do. Any thoughts?
Merin Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 Talk to your Husband about how you're feeling honey.. He is there to support you and be there for you when you need him... A new Baby while brings a lot of Joy.. it can also be very stressful.. You're not alone and I hate for you to not talk to your husband... I know he works a lot of hours BUT being a full time Mom is 24-7 you know? It's a job and work too! Call your OBGYN as well and see about what kind of programs she/he can recommend... Hang in there
Max Zoom Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 Max thinks you should talk to your husand, stop feeling guilty for wanting to care for yourself...depresion is very very serious...get thee to a medical service provider.. toute de suite...you don't want to end up being swallowed by that deep black hole and then have Max and all of us Ls'ers seeing you with a jacket over your head on CNN. Read into that what you will.
Bettyb1802 Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 Hi seagirl. What you are suffering with is very common. I had my 1st child at 18 and suffered major depression, it's a big shock to the system, especially when you've only had to look after yourself, then there's this little thing constantly needing you!! I now have 3 children and when I had my 2nd luckily I was fine. My youngest is 8 months now and I still have off days. It didn't help loosing my nan all at the same time. But I talk to my husband who too works long hours, so please talk to yours, he will listen. Even if you could talk to your mum or another close relative?
jade_nc Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 and you can always come here to vent. i understand how you feel not having anyone close to talk to about personal things like this. what's happening that makes you feel this is postpartum? do you have transportation or means to get out of the house? i'm a stay at home mom with a toddler and one on the way. i've only been staying home for about a year. it hasn't been a bed of roses for me. i was getting really depressed. here are some things that helped me.... i started forcing myself out of the house with my toddler at least once a week. i go to the library more often, i enjoy reading. i have picked up more artwork, supplies, etc. naptime is MY time. i work on whatever little project i've gotten into. as for H, working and providing for the family is very admirable. i know you don't want to bother him, but he needs to realize that you also need to have time for yourself.....and with other adults. see if he can set aside one night a week when he keeps the baby for an hour so you can go out.....run errands, get your nails done - whatever it is that makes you feel more human. if he can't spare that time, hire a sitter.
Lil Honey Posted May 6, 2005 Posted May 6, 2005 Originally posted by jade_nc here are some things that helped me.... i started forcing myself out of the house with my toddler at least once a week. i go to the library more often, i enjoy reading. i have picked up more artwork, supplies, etc. naptime is MY time. i work on whatever little project i've gotten into. Those are good ideas, Jade. It's been a looong time since I had a newborn. Now that the "newborn" is 18, 6'4" and around 250 pounds, he ain't going back where they found him! LMAO I'd like to suggest these: > Put your baby in a stroller and go for a walk. The change of scenery and fresh air will do you both good. > Call the hospital's maternity ward (or community education department). They may have a Mom and Baby group scheduled so that you can talk with other moms with your baby there. > Do not let this go too long or get the best of you. Call your doctor. (BTW, the length of time is different for everyone.)
Author seagirl Posted May 7, 2005 Author Posted May 7, 2005 The reason I think it is postpartum is because I have never felt like this before. I do have a car and go somewhere with my son nearly everyday but that doesn't seen to be helping. I just can't shake this. My family is NOT an option, because if I talk to any one of them they add their own two cents in, change what they don't like, and then begin the gossip where the process begins again. I don't have a family member I can trust with this. They talk about every else in the family and I am not going to be so naive and think that I am the only one that will not be gossiped about. Thanks to everyone for the advice, I will take it to heart!
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