yxalitis Posted July 27, 2015 Posted July 27, 2015 I have tried a fair few dating services, but since I refuse to pay for a service, (Please don’t let this descend into an argument over the virtues of paying for a dating service, I don’t, won’t, full stop) so I just use two. Oasis, and OKCupid. Both are free to use, to the extent that you can actually chat to and arrange a date with someone else. I don’t count Tinder as a dating site, and its use in Australia is minimal. Here’s the thing...I have virtually the same profile, pictures, text, details etc on both sites. Oasis gives me a steady stream of contacts, I have met and had relationships with two people, dated dozens of others, and almost everyone I have met and discussed on this site came via Oasis. I currently have 4 active contacts I’m pursuing in the hope if fiiiiiinally getting that one true love… OKCupid, on the other hand, is a waste of time for me. No idea why, but I sent out well-crafted, thoughtful, individualised messages, and get diddly squat back. I occasionally receive a polite “you sound nice/interesting/other blank compliment but I don’t think we match” response, but mostly I get nothing back. On Oasis you can only “like” someone, if they “like” you back, you can chat. I also get likes on OKCupid, but I have to upgrade to “A-List” to see who these people are. Here’s the thing, it is FREE to message on OKC….so WHY do people just blat that “like” button knowing that only A-List members can see them! What a pointless exercise!! But I digress… I would have thought that serious daters would multi-list, I mean, it’s free, right…? Yes I see virtually no duplicates between the two. So something about the users of both sites differs substantially, and the OKC crowd don’t seem to like the cut of my jib. And I mean, these people who match me >85%, including the controversial “Sex” questions are just NOT replying. I’ve had TWO dates EVER from OKC, one was recorded here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/466992-why-never-easy Who (I worked out) chose a better looking guy (Hello...6 pack) at that time, who turned out to be the WRONG choice. She is still a friend, and one was this girl: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/537927-rudest-girl-i-ever-met So, this is an experiment…people who match me on Sex questions are more sexually open, and these people don’t respond to me. And the ones who aren’t as open (ie, haven’t answered any sex questions publicly) don’t respond either, maybe my frank response are driving both types away! What if I change my sex questions answers to super-conservative? Remove any (answer privately) that are “out there” and the rest will be very…modest. I’ll update this thread with the results. NOTE, I do not intend to lie, I’ll simply tone down the response a notch, and hide those that are potentially offensive to the gentler dispositioned.
Author yxalitis Posted July 27, 2015 Author Posted July 27, 2015 After making the changes yesterday, I checked my profile today... 36 likes!! Except, of course, I can't see who any of them are!! I added a note to the top of my profile, letting people know that if they want to contact me, to send a message...! I have over 100 likes I can't view!~
RoseVille Posted July 27, 2015 Posted July 27, 2015 Every good date/relationship I've ever had from OLD came from Match. I'm going to stick with that one. 2
DaisyBug Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 When I answered the OKC questions, I skipped the TMI sex ones, simply because it's nunna anyone's daaaaamn binniss. See what happens when you men cool your jets? The ladeez start sniffin' 'round! Makes you less intimidating. Good luck!!
nadine5 Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 My current relationship (7 months) is from OKC and my previous relationship of 6 months was also on OKC... this was after I paid for three months of Match.
Author yxalitis Posted July 28, 2015 Author Posted July 28, 2015 When I answered the OKC questions, I skipped the TMI sex ones, simply because it's nunna anyone's daaaaamn binniss. See what happens when you men cool your jets? The ladeez start sniffin' 'round! Makes you less intimidating. Good luck!! That is precisely my thought process. TMI sex questions = potential player...skip
Gaeta Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 It all depends on location so you have to keep that in mind when you hear about people's experience with dating site. Where I am match is useless. OkC is mediocre and full of scam. The best is pof and badoo beleive it or not. When I'm on okc I never answer those math questions. When I did it sent me on dates with men I felt a brother vibe with. I don't want to meet my reflection.
Toodaloo Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 Having spoken to others I think its regional too. Just a couple of counties can make all the difference. Also timing. I have found that for some reason you tend to get a whole heap of guys who are just looking for ONS log on then that will die down and some better quality guys will log on and so the cycle continues...
kendahke Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 OKC….so WHY do people just blat that “like” button knowing that only A-List members can see them! What a pointless exercise!! chances are, they are doing the quickmatch on their cell phone and they swipe left if they like your profile, swipe right to next. They don't give the option on the cell phone version to find out the name of the person you just liked--you move on to the next picture. I figured out that that must be what they're doing because guys who have 20% match rating will like me and I'm like "really? You didn't see that match rating? We'd be fighting all the time". Meanwhile, a guy I have a 98% match rating, who I've liked and sent 2 messages to, which he's read, will. not. respond to me. But I digress… I would have thought that serious daters would multi-list, I mean, it’s free, right…? Yes I see virtually no duplicates between the two. So something about the users of both sites differs substantially, and the OKC crowd don’t seem to like the cut of my jib. And I mean, these people who match me >85%, including the controversial “Sex” questions are just NOT replying. I’ve had TWO dates EVER from OKC, one was recorded here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/466992-why-never-easy Who (I worked out) chose a better looking guy (Hello...6 pack) at that time, who turned out to be the WRONG choice. She is still a friend, and one was this girl: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/537927-rudest-girl-i-ever-met So, this is an experiment…people who match me on Sex questions are more sexually open, and these people don’t respond to me. And the ones who aren’t as open (ie, haven’t answered any sex questions publicly) don’t respond either, maybe my frank response are driving both types away! What if I change my sex questions answers to super-conservative? Remove any (answer privately) that are “out there” and the rest will be very…modest. I’ll update this thread with the results. NOTE, I do not intend to lie, I’ll simply tone down the response a notch, and hide those that are potentially offensive to the gentler dispositioned. I, personally, avoid the sex questions because IMO, that's between me and my man, not the millions of men on the site. If things between us kick off well, they can ask me those questions then, but I'm not sharing that information on a dating site for it to potentially come back to haunt me. 2
kendahke Posted July 28, 2015 Posted July 28, 2015 Having spoken to others I think its regional too. Just a couple of counties can make all the difference. Also timing. I have found that for some reason you tend to get a whole heap of guys who are just looking for ONS log on then that will die down and some better quality guys will log on and so the cycle continues... And then, there are the catfish... anyone who likes or contacts me will have their profile put through a google search. 8 times out of 10, they're a catfish and I can find the exact same prose on at least 5 other dating sites. The biggest clue that they're a catfish: "You are so pretty...i think we will make a great couple...i will like to talk with you at your leisure" Not knowing how to use auxiliary verbs from someone who is supposedly educated past graduate level and over the age of 55? Catfish.
Author yxalitis Posted July 28, 2015 Author Posted July 28, 2015 And then, there are the catfish... anyone who likes or contacts me will have their profile put through a google search. 8 times out of 10, they're a catfish and I can find the exact same prose on at least 5 other dating sites. The biggest clue that they're a catfish: "You are so pretty...i think we will make a great couple...i will like to talk with you at your leisure" Not knowing how to use auxiliary verbs from someone who is supposedly educated past graduate level and over the age of 55? Catfish. So catfish is a fake profile...? Why catfish...where does that term come from, I've never heard it in this context before.
Author yxalitis Posted August 2, 2015 Author Posted August 2, 2015 Results of my experiment... Nothing. I've shut down that account...for whatever reason, it's simply a waste of time for me.
jay1983 Posted August 2, 2015 Posted August 2, 2015 Well most people use the app on their mobile. They check you out, read your profile once and decided whether or not to message you. I know there are some but very few sit at the computer and compare sex questions.
Author yxalitis Posted August 2, 2015 Author Posted August 2, 2015 Well most people use the app on their mobile. They check you out, read your profile once and decided whether or not to message you. I know there are some but very few sit at the computer and compare sex questions. Curse you mobile generation!
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