contel3 Posted July 25, 2015 Posted July 25, 2015 Like the title says. There's no way around having to see them together so how do I stop caring? I don't miss him or want him back. Just makes me sick to the stomach and I wish he'd find another girlfriend. Any woman other than her really.
aloneinaz Posted July 25, 2015 Posted July 25, 2015 Like the title says. There's no way around having to see them together so how do I stop caring? I don't miss him or want him back. Just makes me sick to the stomach and I wish he'd find another girlfriend. Any woman other than her really. It shouldn't really matter who your ex is with. What's important is he's NOT you worry or problem anymore. You need to focus on you, getting over it, meeting someone new and then you won't give a crap about him.
mightycpa Posted July 25, 2015 Posted July 25, 2015 Nobody can answer the question you're really asking - how do you stop caring right now? I don't know that you can. You've got your own personal little strain of obsession. If you can see him with girls A - X, but not with girl Z, then I suppose this is more about girl Z than it is about him. So I'm not sure what helps other than time, or him breaking up with girl Z, whichever comes first.
Author contel3 Posted July 25, 2015 Author Posted July 25, 2015 I don't know that you can. You've got your own personal little strain of obsession. If you can see him with girls A - X, but not with girl Z, then I suppose this is more about girl Z than it is about him. It's not really Z....not directly. It's about the overlap. He was already pursuing her while we were together (I didn't know). When I found out I felt so humiliated and heartbroken that I actually felt physical pain for several days and couldn't leave my bed. Seeing them is a constant reminder.
infiniteQuest Posted July 25, 2015 Posted July 25, 2015 What might work for you really needs to be discussed on a personal level. The horrible feelings associated with betrayal and being lied to are universally painful, but what helps people cope really depends on their own self-knowledge. We have no idea what you're like, what ticks you off, what your fears are, what emotional landscape looks like. Maybe you can start by writing down how exactly this situation makes you feel, in detail, what you find the most horrifying about it, how your view of your previous relationship with this man changed based on what he did, how your view of yourself has changed based on what you did. Are you logical? What's the best way to comfort you? You have to know these things about yourself in order to seek the appropriate guidance that would offer your comfort. How do you feel about this explanation of infidelity? :
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