6 mths NC with ex, but still having some guilty feelings, accidentally broke NC today

[ForwardFocused]

Hello everyone. I apologize in advance for the length of this post. I have a lot to say, but I'll try to make it as short as possible, I found this site about a month ago and finally decided today to write about my situation. I want to get some feedback/input about my ex. Since I went NC, I rehash things in my mind quite frequently, wondering if I could have done something differently…but I really want to close this chapter in my life completely. I think what I need is some unbiased, honest opinions from persons who care to listen. I would appreciate that.

 

I decided to go NC with my ex in Dec 2014; but I'm still having some underlying guilty feelings. I think a lot of the guilty feelings stem from the WAY I chose to end things. The truth is – I decided to break up with my ex without actually telling him I'm breaking up with him. Our relationship had been rocky for a long time, but the last straw for me was when he disappeared for 3 months…after which he reappeared and shifted the focus off of himself, wanting me to explain why I had not contacted him. I know I should have ended things in a better way, but trust me when I say I was too tired and frustrated by his behavior and actions at that point, that I honestly did not have any more energy left to explain the level of disrespect and disregard he had for my feelings and our relationship. I just cut him off without a word because I wanted my silence to speak louder than any of my words ever could.

 

Here are some things I want to share about our relationship and when things went downhill:

 

- We were together for 7 years

 

- Met him when I was 17 (about to turn 18).

 

- He is 10 years older than me.

 

- He was my first love, first relationship, etc.

 

- Honestly, I should have left the relationship long before I decided enough was enough. I held on and on...and on because I really loved him. Being young, naïve and in love, my rose colored glasses were glued on. I did not want to walk away from the relationship, despite the fact that signs were there throughout the years that he was taking me for granted. Very often, his actions did not line up with his words (e.g. he would say he missed me, but would not make an effort to communicate more or see me). For a very long time I did not want to come to terms with the fact that this guy who I was so in love with, was not truly willing to fulfill my needs.

 

- We had communication issues, he texted me more than he called, he did not find much time to spend with me due to being busy working (he worked while I went to school), I felt like I was the only one really pushing to spend time together, he started locking his phone (which was a very big red flag for me), etc. Despite all of these problems, I felt that they were fixable. Admittedly, my self-worth was quite low when I was with him, so felt that it was better to work on the issues than starting over with someone else.

 

- Whenever I tried to open up to him and tell him about the things that I was unhappy about in our relationship, 9 times out of 10 when I approached him with my feelings, he would shut down (because he felt that it would turn into an 'argument'). I did not feel like he cared enough to really try to listen, improve the dynamic of our relationship or move things to the next level. I truly had a desire to make things better and work on us, but I felt alone.

 

- I think that God really wanted to knock my rose colored glasses off, because evidence of his cheating ways fell into my lap in 2013.

 

- I found out in December 2013 that he cheated on me. I asked him if he cheated on me more than once, but he denied it each time. When I confronted him, I did not have the evidence because I found out when snooped in his email (which I know was wrong to do). I know that snooping is a breach of trust, so I forsaw an argument and turning of tables on me if I told him I found photos in his email account. Not only had he been sending and receiving nude photos, he also emailed himself a photo of himself cheating (having sex). The photo was dated Sept. 2013. I also found a very inappropriate whatsapp convo where he essentially was inviting God knows who to spend the weekend with. It was also brought to my attention through snooping that he had created a fake facebook profile in 2012. I had no knowledge of this account whatsoever. As far as I know, he did not have a fb account. I was shocked to say the least to say when I found out that he was somewhat active on it, had added random people he does not even know, liked a lot of random pictures (not friends of his, just those random posts of models and those posts where you choose the most attractive model out of a selection of photos or rate them). He also commented things on pics like 'wow' 'awesome' 'nice', etc.

 

- I'm ashamed to say that I stayed with him after he lied to me about the cheating, but I started to slowly but surely take the steps to emotionally detach throughout 2014. I stopped calling him and barely texted him. After a while, he started realizing I wasn't chasing him down anymore and began to sense a change in me. I remember he said to me one day 'You've been busy these days. Seems like someone is occupying your time'. One day he flat out asked me if I'm dating someone else. To be honest though, his question/comment kind of hurt because the first thing he assumed since being somewhat distant with him was that I was seeing someone else? He was not concerned about my emotional wellbeing, he did not ask if I was alright or if I wanted to talk, he just assumed I was seeing someone else- which was not the case.

 

 

The last straw (and when I decided to cut him off and go No Contact):

 

- He sent me a belated birthday text message in September 2014 (the day AFTER my birthday), apologizing and said that he was sick and was sorry for calling or texting on my birthday. What I found interesting is that I saw him on Whatsapp on my birthday...

 

- After his message in September, I did not hear from him until 3 months later on CHRISTMAS DAY. He called me. I did not answer. To make matters even worse, he texted me, said Merry Christmas, but immediately he said that he has not heard from me and asked 'what has he done'. I did not respond and decided to just leave him alone. There was nothing for me to explain- when HE was the one who was gone for all those months. Yes, throughout our relationship there were days that went by where we would not speak. Sometimes a week or 2 would go by as well, but 3 MONTHS was the longest time that had ever elapsed without us speaking. Days and weeks is bad enough (and he KNEW I was unhappy about the poor communication between us), but enough was enough after the 3 months.

 

Since going NC on Christmas day these are the occasions when he tried contacting me:

 

(1) Two weeks after Christmas day, he called me several times, then left a text message saying that he hopes I am ok, that he has been trying to reach me. No response from me.

 

(2) The last week in January he called twice and left voice message. I listened to the msg, could not hear most of it, but from what I could make out he said again that he had been trying to reach me, we haven't spoken in a long time...and IF(he emphasized the if) it is that there's someone else why didn't I just tell him, rather than ignore his calls. I gave it some thought and decided to return his call an hour after he called (11:30pm). He had been trying to reach me, so I said to myself that maybe he wants to have a conversation. I intended to call him back, to let him know that I received his message, but did not hear more than half of it - and give him an opportunity to say what he has to say. I call once, but it went to voicemail.

 

He did not return my call nor text me AT ALL since I returned his phone call that night. Not a phone call, not a text. Nothing. It really hurt and it took a long time to get over the fact that I broke no contact only to be ignored. I refused to call him again or make and further contact and tried to move on the best way I could. I also blocked his number in February.

 

(3 On May 5th, to my surprise he called me on my phone (I saw the blocked calls). I think he saw me sign into Skype that day (I signed in to make a work-related call). He called an hour after I signed in. Too much of a coinsidence, right?

 

(4) June 12th- after making several attempts to call me, he realized I had blocked his number. He then sent me a few texts after that. He basically said that he sees that I blocked his number and said 'I understand'. I remained silent, but stupidly started to feel guilty and unblocked his number *sigh*

 

(5) A week after that he called me again (this time my phone rang because his number was unblocked). I did not answer. He texted me after he called: “why am I being ignored’ 'do you want me to stop calling your number? Please let me know'. Again, I remained stone cold silent.

 

(6) On July 9, a week after his birthday, he called me twice. Again, I remained silent.

 

 

How I accidentally broke NC today and how I feel overall:

 

Today I accidentally broke NC because I was stalking his whatsapp profile, my hand slipped and I pressed the call button. This happened at 12:30am! I'm pretty sure he was asleep at the time, but of course he would have seen the missed call this morning. Has he called me back or texted me at all? No.

 

I guess he feels good now because he has realized I have been viewing his profile, even though I have been ignoring him. He perhaps is playing tit-for-tat and is ignoring me now. I feel embarrassed about it, but I feel that my stalking has to stop asap. I never blocked him on whatsapp (but he probably thought I did because I deleted his number...and persons who are not on my contact list cannot see my profile pic. He has not messaged me on whatsapp since I went NC btw). I feel that his profile and our whatsapp+ text convos are the only pieces of him I have left. I have deleted his pics from my phone (saved on a memory stick and put away), but I haven't deleted the text and whatsapp convo history yet...

 

I have not fully let go as you all can see.

 

Since he has made some attempts to contact me after I went NC, I have been feeling a bit guilty (on and off) about cutting him off the way I did. I have been wanting to send him some sort of message to explain why I did what I did, but I have held myself back for a long time from messaging him (because I don’t want to rehash the past with him and sound bitter). I really want to tell him that it was because of his disappearance for the 3 months and the cheating why I cut him off. I REALLY want to tell him that, but I know it would do no good for me, so I've been trying my best to move on for quite some time.

 

Unfortunately, I broke NC today. I doubt he will ever contact me again, but it should not matter *sigh* I will be ok. I think I’m handling his silence today fairly well... but I guess it is affecting me to some degree, or else I would not be writing here for support. I can't help but wonder though; why was he trying to contact me for months.... and then when he actually saw a missed call from me (despite it being at 12:30AM) he did not take the opportunity to reach back out to me? I thought that he would have actually reached out to me and text something along the lines of “I saw your missed call, would you like to talk?” Some sort of acknowledgement, you know? Either he is playing a power game or he could not have truly wanted to reach me in the first place.

 

Any thoughts/opinions/input would be appreciated. I’m so tired of thinking about him. I am exhausted. The accidental breaking or NC has made me a bit emotional I guess.

[quattrob]

Sorry to break it to you, you weren't doing NC. LC maybe but certainly not NC with all those times you whatsapp stalked and not blocking his messages, you should not have received any notifications of calls or messages if you truly blocked him. Imagine how it would be if you didn't know he called or messaged you those things. You'd be in a much better place by now I'd imagine but because you didn't block him from every source, you still haven't gotten far to move on.

[ForwardFocused]

Sorry to break it to you, you weren't doing NC. LC maybe but certainly not NC with all those times you whatsapp stalked and not blocking his messages, you should not have received any notifications of calls or messages if you truly blocked him. Imagine how it would be if you didn't know he called or messaged you those things. You'd be in a much better place by now I'd imagine but because you didn't block him from every source, you still haven't gotten far to move on.

 

You're right quattrob. LC is a better description of what I have been implementing, rather than NC. I blocked his number and did not take his calls for a few months, but when guilt kicked in, I unblocked him. I have not blocked him from messaging me, nor on Whatsapp and I have not deleted old text conversation logs (both SMS and Whatsapp). That's not NC. It' is so hard to completely let go of everything...

 

I added his number to my auto-reject call list, which I thought would block calls entirely without a trace, but it does not. Though the phone does not ring, auto-rejected calls are still listed in call logs. Call blocker apps do the same thing. They block the call from coming through, but they store the blocked calls in a blocking log/journal within the app. It is still visible, so notifications seem inevitable.

 

For those of you who have blocked your ex from calling, how are you not receiving notifications?

[mightycpa]

Our relationship had been rocky for a long time, but the last straw for me was when he disappeared for 3 months…after which he reappeared and shifted the focus off of himself, wanting me to explain why I had not contacted him. I know I should have ended things in a better way, but trust me when I say I was too tired and frustrated by his behavior and actions at that point, that I honestly did not have any more energy left to explain the level of disrespect and disregard he had for my feelings and our relationship. I just cut him off without a word

You should have stuck with that from the git-go. Stop stalking and your accidental button pushes won't happen.

 

You're your own worst enemy here.

[contel3]

You have no reason to feel guilty. HE faded on YOU for three months without explanation. He cheated. You're just giving him a taste of his own medicine- and you know what? He deserves it. Try to figure out why exactly you feel so guilty. There's probably a more complex reason than what you just said. If you can figure this out, forgive him and most of all yourself...you will feel a lot better.

[ForwardFocused]

Thank you to those of you who have responded.

 

I feel underlying guilt because I cut him off without explaining and ignored many of his calls and texts (even though he deserved it). The whole concept of ignoring is hard and caused me to feel bad, but I suppose I put myself in that position since I did not block him on all avenues.

 

A part of the reason why I did not block him fully is because I thought that with enough silence he would eventually figure out why I did what I did (or at least own up to being gone for 3 months), but he never did. I just wanted him to own up to his actions, have a final talk with him and be done with it so I can just close this chapter.

[ForwardFocused]

Hey everyone,

 

I admit that I kept my ex unblocked this past weekend to see if he would contact me since my accidental call on Friday. He did not.

 

I guess I thought he would have, seeing that he had been trying for a while to contact me (his last contact was 3 weeks ago).

 

To anyone who has been through as similar situation (tried to contact an ex who went NC on you (to no avail) and then heard from them in some shape or form months down the line), did you ignore them when you heard from them?

 

I can't believe I'm still thinking about this...

[quattrob]

It is normal to think about him and these things but what you need to do for yourself is go completely NC. And im not suggesting that just because everyone here preaches it, its because you are doing things that can potentially hurt yourself and also waste your time. You still havent let go and you still have hope in a potential relationship with him in the future.

 

But never put your life on hold for something or someone, take control of your own life and live it the way you deserve. And i think the reason why you feel guilty for ignoring him is not just because you feel bad for treating him that way, its more like you are still thinking and caring about him because you have that hope in you and havent let go.

[ForwardFocused]

It is normal to think about him and these things but what you need to do for yourself is go completely NC. And im not suggesting that just because everyone here preaches it, its because you are doing things that can potentially hurt yourself and also waste your time. You still havent let go and you still have hope in a potential relationship with him in the future.

 

But never put your life on hold for something or someone, take control of your own life and live it the way you deserve. And i think the reason why you feel guilty for ignoring him is not just because you feel bad for treating him that way, its more like you are still thinking and caring about him because you have that hope in you and havent let go.

 

Hi quattrob,

 

I don't have a hope for a potential relationship with him in the future - I have a hope to be able to eventually have a talk with him so that I can let him know exactly why I cut him off - a hope to have a proper ending to our 7 year relationship.

 

I'm angry at myself for not saying the things I wanted to say to him sooner. It hurts that he cheated and lied and it is upsetting that he disappeared for the time that he did and did not take responsibility for it. I don't think he knows at all that I feel hurt because he did those things and I feel that he has gotten away with doing them guilt free.... but here I am not able to fully let go. I think that he thinks the reason why I cut him off is because I found someone else, which is so untrue.

 

You are right. I cannot put my life on hold anymore, but it is so hard to see that he is guilt free. I really hoped that he would have put a lot more effort into finding out what was wrong. He just phoned and texted me a couple times. He never showed up at my door, never asked to actually meet up to talk...and I hoped for that, but it's never going to happen. So yes I really am wasting my time....

[quattrob]

Hi quattrob,

 

I don't have a hope for a potential relationship with him in the future - I have a hope to be able to eventually have a talk with him so that I can let him know exactly why I cut him off - a hope to have a proper ending to our 7 year relationship.

 

I'm angry at myself for not saying the things I wanted to say to him sooner. It hurts that he cheated and lied and it is upsetting that he disappeared for the time that he did and did not take responsibility for it. I don't think he knows at all that I feel hurt because he did those things and I feel that he has gotten away with doing them guilt free.... but here I am not able to fully let go. I think that he thinks the reason why I cut him off is because I found someone else, which is so untrue.

 

You are right. I cannot put my life on hold anymore, but it is so hard to see that he is guilt free. I really hoped that he would have put a lot more effort into finding out what was wrong. He just phoned and texted me a couple times. He never showed up at my door, never asked to actually meet up to talk...and I hoped for that, but it's never going to happen. So yes I really am wasting my time....

 

 

He already knows why the relationship ended, only an true imbecile wouldn't. And obviously he doesn't care how you feel or how you were hurt but trust me it won't matter if you let him know exactly how you felt etc.. guilt does not come from what you say. Guilt comes from what he realizes himself. Your words wouldn't do anything except cause you more pain because you're looking for a reaction from him and when you are, most of the time you'll be disappointed with the outcome.

 

 

Why waste so much time and effort with someone like him? He treat you like crap and you were nice enough to give him opportunities and chances to prove himself better but each and every time it seems he disappointed you.

 

 

My point is, the sooner you can let go of everything the sooner you'll be happy. Treat yourself right, who cares if he doesn't feel guilty? In the end what matters is your life not what's going on in his life.

[ForwardFocused]

It has been about a month since I posted here.

 

Since then, I have blocked my ex's number, but I would be lying if I said I haven't checked my spam calls/msgs a couple times to see if he has attempted to call or text.

 

I don't know why I keep breaking NC. It's not doing me any good and quite frankly it's just making me miserable....

 

You know what is crazy? For the past few days I have been kind of missing him and have been wanting to contact him. What kind of sense does that make when this guy has not contacted me at all since my accidental call a month ago. He obviously does not care about me and I'm pretty sure if I contact him he will not respond...

 

Someone please talk some sense into me...

[ForwardFocused]

I think one of the things I am really struggling with is forgiving myself for what I put myself through during my relationship with my ex.

 

Yes he was my first love and I loved him so very much, but that shouldn't have made me overlook the fact that he took me for granted. When we were together, we did speak about the future, marriage, etc, but I doubt he was serious about any of it. That couldn't be any more clearer to me over the past couple months after seeing how he gave up on us so fast...

 

I wouldn't have let a couple unanswered phone calls or being blocked deter me from talking to the person I love. What did he expect me to do after he was gone for the 3 months? Welcome him back with open arms? No. I was angry. I was hurt that he felt he could walk in and out of my life with no sort of explanation or regard for my feelings. So I did what I thought was best for me at the time.

 

I wouldn't have given up so easily on the person I love, but after a few calls that went to voicemail, he gave up on me...and that's the harsh reality of the type of man I chose to be in a long-term relationship with.

 

It has made me feel easily replaceable, not really worth fighting for and forgotten, but I keep telling myself those feelings are not true.

 

I have so much work to do to get my self worth to where it needs to be

Edited September 5, 2015 by ForwardFocused
Spelling

[ForwardFocused]

I saw his car in the parking lot at his workplace yesterday. I wasn't the one driving, so it was unavoidable..

 

I don't know if it's because of that, or because it's my birthday tomorrow, but I'm feeling reflective today.

 

I met with some friends last night who I had not seen in almost a year, which was really nice. We caught up over dinner and had some laughs. They're both in serious relationships (the boyfriend of one is talking seriously about marriage and the other is living with her bf, has ben talking about marriage and wants to have a child within the next year or so).

 

Without going into much detail, I told them about how I am feeling. They encouraged me, told me I deserved so much more and that I should take my relationship with my ex as a learning experience for my next relationship. Some days are definitely better than others, but since last night I've been reflecting on my life, wondering if I'll ever love someone again the way I loved my ex, wondering if my next relationship will end the way my relationship did with my ex..

 

I'm not dating now (I'm not entirely ready yet), but maybe I should join a dating site and see what happens..

[ForwardFocused]

I (stupidly) unblocked him today on whatsapp, because I've been pondering about sending him a brief message. I know, I know *sigh*

 

Well....needless to say, I saw that he had a status message that said "I'm happy, I love you, you know who you are", which threw me for a loop because it was put up 3 days after I accidentally called him.

 

I know many of you might be saying right now, I should not have, under any circumstance unblocked him, time to move on, etc.

 

I don't know what more to say. I guess he has moved on and loves someone else now I just... wonder why it was put up so close to the day I called. Made me wonder if he wanted me to see it.

[ForwardFocused]

I know I caused this on myself. Had I not unblocked him, I would not feel the way I do right now. I wouldn't have seen his status. I wouldn't have known that he is happy and loves someone else right now.

 

It has affected me more than I thought because I burst into tears not too long ago

 

Idk if I'll be back on here to talk about this or not. This thread has turned into a soliloquy, and I'm not really saying anything positive or taken much advice (which I'm sure is pretty annoying to some here who was nice enough took the time to advise me), so I'll try to deal with these feelings on my own the best way I can.

[ForwardFocused]

I will never send this message to him, so I decided to write here instead.

 

 

All the hope I had for you and I to have a conversation, died last week. It died when I stupidly unblocked you and saw your status message on whatsapp, declaring your love for someone else. It died when I realized that, just 3 days after you saw a missed call from me on whatsapp, you put up this message. It's like you wanted to rub it in my face. Why??

 

I was hurting so much in December. I was hurting when you came back after 3 months turning things around on me and asking me why you haven't heard from me, asking me what you had done? - Like you had absolutely no clue...

 

I loved you back then, but I was so tired of keeping our relationship afloat. When you reappeared, ignoring your calls was my way of seeing just how much you wanted to be with me; to see how far you would go to get back in my good graces; to see if you really wanted a future with me; to see if you would ask to have a talk with me. Honestly, if you had asked to talk, I would have talked to you.

 

To this day, I don't know what you would have said to me if I picked up your phone calls. Maybe you would have turned things around on me, yet again, saying that you had been trying to reach me, and completely disregard what you had done. I have a feeling that's what you would have said. Also, the time span in between your phone calls were weeks apart. They were so sporadic. They were never within the same week; never a consistent effort on your part. To me, that's not the behavior of someone who feels like they are losing someone.

 

I guess you didn't care about losing me then. Maybe you let me go a long time ago, but I was the one holding on. If you really wanted to get a hold of me or say something meaningful to me, you could have said it through text.e time that you express yourself better that way, so why didn't you text me? You could have made an unannounced visit to where I live. You could have sent a message with mutual friends - but you did none of that. I have literally been sitting on my hands and holding myself back from contacting you. Yet, after 7 years with me, you just swung along to the next woman so effortlessly, declaring you love her on whatsapp and leaving me behind.

 

I see now that you are happy and in love. I don't know how you are in love already, but I'm not going to question it, I'll just accept it.

[d0nnivain]

I will never send this message to him, so I decided to write here instead.

Posting it here is perfect. Sending it to him, not so much. Another technique I use, print this out & safely light it on fire. Watch it burn & send all your upset away in the smoke.

[ForwardFocused]

Posting it here is perfect. Sending it to him, not so much. Another technique I use, print this out & safely light it on fire. Watch it burn & send all your upset away in the smoke.

 

Yes, posting it here is the best thing for me. I actually feel a little better since I wrote it.

 

Does that really work to release anger lol? Lighting a written letter on fire?

[erklat]

Anything will do better than sending that.

 

Please don't be me - I was the guy that can't

move on.

[d0nnivain]

Does that really work to release anger lol? Lighting a written letter on fire?

 

It works for me. What have you got to lose by trying it? Just be safe. I'm not advocating arson here.

[ForwardFocused]

Anything will do better than sending that.

 

Please don't be me - I was the guy that can't

move on.

 

Thank you erklat. It will take some time, but I really want to reach the stage of indifference towards my ex.

 

I had to learn the hard way, but now I know that keeping him blocked is for my own good. I refuse to go backwards again.

 

I have to focus forward towards my healing. Otherwise, I will remain stuck indefinitely.

[ForwardFocused]

It works for me. What have you got to lose by trying it? Just be safe. I'm not advocating arson here.

 

I have some emotions I need to release, so I'll give it a try

[mightycpa]

I don't really understand your guilt. It seems irrational to me:

 

After his message in September, I did not hear from him until 3 months later on CHRISTMAS DAY. He called me. I did not answer. To make matters even worse, he texted me, said Merry Christmas, but immediately he said that he has not heard from me and asked 'what has he done'. I did not respond and decided to just leave him alone.

 

So, probably, IF you were going to respond, you should have responded with something like:

 

**** you. I don't ever want to talk to you again. Go disappear back into whatever hole you've been hiding in.

 

That said, it was Christmas, so... maybe not.

 

But would that really be better than what you did? Would that be an improvement somehow? Back then, I think so, at least for me. That would have been my closure. But now, at this point in time, the two approaches seem pretty much the same to me.

 

IDK why you're pining over that.

[ForwardFocused]

I don't really understand your guilt. It seems irrational to me:

 

 

 

So, probably, IF you were going to respond, you should have responded with something like:

 

 

 

That said, it was Christmas, so... maybe not.

 

But would that really be better than what you did? Would that be an improvement somehow? Back then, I think so, at least for me. That would have been my closure. But now, at this point in time, the two approaches seem pretty much the same to me.

 

IDK why you're pining over that.

 

 

I wish I knew about this forum a year ago, so I could have gotten advice on how to respond to him upon his return back then. Many of you would have advocated for no contact - but like you mightycpa, I believe that sending something along the lines of what you wrote would have helped a great deal in the process closure for me.

 

I wouldn't say I'm pining, I'm just hurt about how things transpired. The 'guilt' I felt was really because I ignored his calls and texts- which was something I had never done during our relationship. I was hoping for something more, having known this guy since 2006. So to see how fast he moved on, when he was the one who was wrong, makes me upset.

[ForwardFocused]

So today, I discovered that he called me twice.

 

I went in my call logs to look for someone who called me yesterday and saw his auto rejected number.

 

Honestly, I thought I would never hear from him again. As I said in a recent post, since late July (when I accidentally called him and he didn't return my call) he had up a status message that said 'I'm happy, I love you, you know who you are'.

 

Admittedly, I have been thinking about him a lot over the past few days. I tried hard not to (I really have a problem being disciplined to keep him blocked...I keep flip-flopping), but I unblocked him on whatsapp a couple hours after discovering he called me and also saw that he changed his status message today to "If making you happy cost me my happiness then I cant afford you!!".

 

I know that it's not my business trying to decode this message, but it's just strange that he put up this message the same day he called me. Furthermore, he never really puts up status messages...

 

Any thoughts?