I want more than just sex. Flirting for 'good/a bit slow' women (& good men)

[GalWithNiceGuyFriend]

Help a dummy out. I'm a lady who's recently attracted to a long time guy friend. I am madly attracted to this man. It's insane. But I want more than just sex because I do care deeply for him. We have known each other for almost a decade.

 

Please teach people like us what to do to let a guy know you like him more than a friend. My story is here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/transitioning/friends-lovers/538736-unsure-if-he-wants-more-just-being-nice

[fitnessfan365]

You've been good friends with the guy for ten years. So that emotional connection already exists. The only thing that would change is that now anytime you two spend time together it would end in the bedroom..LOL

 

But here's an idea. Why not just use honest communication? Tell him "I know we've been friends for years. But I'm very attracted to you, and want to be more than just friends". Then after you say it go in for a kiss. If he reciprocates, you have your answer. I think people tend to over complicate things.

[54JA]

A decade of friendship is precious. Please think about the risks vs benefits, long and hard, before you do anything. I ruined a good friendship with a special friend of over 7 years because we hooked up (I was on a rebound, too). He was close me and my family. He could have been my life time friend, but I missed out on that opportunity.

 

At least wait a little until you can see how he is responding to his breakup. You don't want to be his rebound girl.

[DaisyBug]

Your situation so reminds me of a song by Steve Wariner & Anita Cochran called "What If I Said," in case you want to YouTube it. It's about a male & female who've been friends for years and each are afraid to let the other know how they really feel. Sample from the chorus:

 

 

Do we dare cross to that line

Between your heart and mine

Or would I lose a friend

Or find a love that would never end

What if I said

 

 

That's kinda the way to look at it... You could possibly lose a friend, or you could find a love that will never end. I say... It's worth the shot.

[yxalitis]

Or you could read the replies already posted in your first thread....

[GalWithNiceGuyFriend]

Thanks people. Now how to do it!!! What if I ruin it all just because of sex? This is my biggest fear. Although I must admit the idea of sex with him is something that makes me melt

 

I want more than sex. And I'm slow in that area too. Dilemma.

[fitnessfan365]

I want more than sex. And I'm slow in that area too. Dilemma.

 

This isn't a guy you just met/started dating.

 

You've known him for ten years and are close friends. So you already have more than just sex, and you've already spent ten years taking it super slow. In this particular case, it's perfectly fine to jump right into sex because you've already laid the groundwork IMO.