hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Calling all busy women...How do yall find time to date? I mean busy as in can maybe go on a date once or twice a month.
infiniteQuest Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Your problem is not that you're busy, it's that you don't have your priorities straight. You're not making room for what's important in your life and you need to re-evalue your priorities and align your daily actions to those priorities. 1
jen1447 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Calling all busy women...How do yall find time to date? I mean busy as in can maybe go on a date once or twice a month. Make time to date. Are you really that busy that you've only got one free night a month? I'd never get by on that!
fitnessfan365 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 When people say they're "too busy" it makes me think of a client of mine. He works 80-90 hour weeks running his own patent law firm. Yet he still finds time to practice baseball with his son 2-3x a week, take his daughter to activities, and make time with his wife. I think for a lot of people with somewhat normal schedules, 2x a week at least isn't that hard to do. It's usually just a matter of priorities. 3
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 Make time to date. Are you really that busy that you've only got one free night a month? I'd never get by on that! Yes, pretty much. Some days I barely sleep. Someone asked me if I'm on crack lol
Vintage79 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 "I'm too busy" is the best excuse ever for being single...I know investment bankers in NYC that do 100 hrs/week, sleep under their desk a few nights a week, and can still get out on 2-3 days/week...you're never too busy if you want to date, it's just an excuse for being lame... 1
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 "I'm too busy" is the best excuse ever for being single...I know investment bankers in NYC that do 100 hrs/week, sleep under their desk a few nights a week, and can still get out on 2-3 days/week...you're never too busy if you want to date, it's just an excuse for being lame... Im not lame, but i essentially jave two full time jobs now. A guy who only needs to date once a month would be nice to find.
kendahke Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Im not lame, but i essentially jave two full time jobs now. A guy who only needs to date once a month would be nice to find. good luck finding him. I think that with anything worth having, if you won't make time for it, you should just do without it until your life settles down a whole lot. Not too many people are fine with being relegated to "afterthought" status because there are a gazillion things ahead of them on your priority list.
Vintage79 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Im not lame, but i essentially jave two full time jobs now. A guy who only needs to date once a month would be nice to find. I doubt you work more than the IBankers I know (16hrs/day, 6 days/week)...and they still get out 2-3x/week if they want. Why are you asking people how they can have time to date and when people tell you need to make time to do it, you try to come up with some excuse to say that you can't do that - realistically, it's a low priority for you and you clearly don't want to do it - just be realistic with yourself! And FYI - only being able to find a single day over the course of the entire month to go out for a few hours is getting pretty close to the definition of lame...
smackie9 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Who said it has to be one guy? have a different guy each month. 1
empresario Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 When I was in college I worked 40 hours a week, took 21 credit hours (with a 4.0), and led a professional video game team (I know, nerdy as F). Even then I had time to date. I agree with others, it's about priorities. In my company, the leadership team has a rule we can never say "I don't have the time". In every situation someone uses that it's code for "I really just don't want to". 1
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 I doubt you work more than the IBankers I know (16hrs/day, 6 days/week)...and they still get out 2-3x/week if they want. Why are you asking people how they can have time to date and when people tell you need to make time to do it, you try to come up with some excuse to say that you can't do that - realistically, it's a low priority for you and you clearly don't want to do it - just be realistic with yourself! And FYI - only being able to find a single day over the course of the entire month to go out for a few hours is getting pretty close to the definition of lame... I work 40 or more hours a week, though mostly during 2 or 3xdays. Whew. Then after that is the fitness thing, thats 20-35hrs a,week plus running errands. I need a man who can fit into one of my time slots.
empresario Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 I work 40 or more hours a week, though mostly during 2 or 3xdays. Whew. Then after that is the fitness thing, thats 20-35hrs a,week plus running errands. I need a man who can fit into one of my time slots. So why not try to find a workout buddy? I would love a female that went to the gym with me every day.
Mrin Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 I need a man who can fit into one of my time slots. LOL! Do you have kids?
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 LOL! Do you have kids? Heck no, wouldnt have time for them.
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 So why not try to find a workout buddy? I would love a female that went to the gym with me every day. Well, there was this guy at my gum i kinda liked, but hes married. My fitness center is otherwise older guys and wolen. I picked it bc its close to my house. Nowadays id almost have to meet a guy at the gym or at the beach. I seem to do well finding stalkers at walking tracks.
empresario Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Well, there was this guy at my gum i kinda liked, but hes married. My fitness center is otherwise older guys and wolen. I picked it bc its close to my house. Nowadays id almost have to meet a guy at the gym or at the beach. I seem to do well finding stalkers at walking tracks. You could try OLD and suggest you are first looking for a workout buddy. Get creative. Sounds like that's a time of the day you can share with someone. And going with someone else to the gym forces you to push yourself.
Phoe Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 When I was in college I worked 40 hours a week, took 21 credit hours (with a 4.0), and led a professional video game team (I know, nerdy as F). Even then I had time to date. I agree with others, it's about priorities. In my company, the leadership team has a rule we can never say "I don't have the time". In every situation someone uses that it's code for "I really just don't want to". Heh, I did the 21 credit madness in college, worked 2 jobs, and volunteered in a shelter twice a week. I didn't really date in college. No dates freshman year, 2 dates sophomore year, 1 date junior year, no dates senior year. I never felt that I was too busy, but now that I look back I wonder if I even would've had the time for dating had that opportunity arose. I definitely was strapped for free time.
fitnessfan365 Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 (edited) I work 40 or more hours a week, though mostly during 2 or 3xdays. Whew. Then after that is the fitness thing, thats 20-35hrs a,week plus running errands. I need a man who can fit into one of my time slots. When you say "fitness thing" please tell me that you're a personal trainer, group ex instructor, or have some other job in the fitness industry.. If you're dedicating 20-35 hours a week to exercise, that's excessive and obsessive. I mean it's one thing if you increase your training volume periodically to prepare for certain events. But if you're working out that much regularly on a weekly basis, you suffer from exercise addiction. As a personal trainer that deals with fitness professionally, I highly recommend you seek treatment. http://www.active.com/articles/know-the-signs-of-unhealthy-exercise-addiction - Look at the bottom checklist of symptoms. There are definitely 3-4 about you that jump out right away. Edited July 20, 2015 by fitnessfan365 1
Mrin Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Heck no, wouldnt have time for them. Ok, this is going to sound condescending as Hell but you have no clue what "too busy" is. To a single mom/parent, your life sounds like a relaxing jaunt in the park. NOTE: I promise the condescension will clear by the end of this so stick with me. When I lived in DC part time, I had this great circle of single friends. Most were women between the ages of 37-45. None had kids. I can recall this one conversation we had as we downed a few bottles of champaign sitting around a fire pit at the Georgetown Four Seasons. The gist of it was exactly your point - none of them had time to date. You see, they all had these fantastically full lives between work and working out and activities such as a chorus they all sang in. Seriously, I watch one of them basically account for every single hour of her week. Work. Sleep. Food. Working out. Singing. Book club. Even commute. Sure enough, there was very little "down time". On its face - I get it. We are like goldfish - we grow to the size of our bowls. But here's the thing you learn as a parent. You make time for the things you prioritize. You literally manufacture time. Sometimes - too often - it comes out of sleep. But you also end up trimming here and there. Workouts. Extracurricular activities. You just end up placing that which you prioritize over other things and those other things either diminish in their time or fall off all together. The fact of the matter is you have plenty of time to date. If you valued dating more than some of your other activities. And that's okay. There is nothing wrong with not valuing that. But here's the rub - don't let your "busy-ness" be an excuse not to date or date often. Because it really isn't. The reason you don't date or date often is because you don't value it as much as some of your other activities. 1
phineas Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Im not lame, but i essentially jave two full time jobs now. A guy who only needs to date once a month would be nice to find. That's called a FWB.
mortensorchid Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 I prioritize things in terms of what I really want to do and what I really don't want to do. I make time for certain things and don't for others. I am a busy woman as well. I am always booking my weekends and days ahead of what to do. If the guy thinks that he can text me on a Saturday evening at 8 pm asking to hang out, I already have plans 99% of the time. Some say "you will never meet Mr. Right this way." Not true. Mr. Right would have called/texted much earlier than 8 pm on a Saturday night if he wanted to see me.
Author hotpotato Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 When you say "fitness thing" please tell me that you're a personal trainer, group ex instructor, or have some other job in the fitness industry.. If you're dedicating 20-35 hours a week to exercise, that's excessive and obsessive. I mean it's one thing if you increase your training volume periodically to prepare for certain events. But if you're working out that much regularly on a weekly basis, you suffer from exercise addiction. As a personal trainer that deals with fitness professionally, I highly recommend you seek treatment. Know the signs of unhealthy exercise addiction | ACTIVE - Look at the bottom checklist of symptoms. There are definitely 3-4 about you that jump out right away. At this rate, ill be hired as a fitness instructor in the near future. I do planned overreaching then i pull back every few weeks. Thats when i need a guy to fit in. I want to compete, and i dont want to look subpar on stage.
clia Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I agree with the others. You make time for what is important to you. If you don't have time to date...then dating doesn't rank very high on your priority list.
joseb Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 The problem is you will not have enough time to build up any connection with someone you see that infrequently. What are you competing in that takes 35 hours a week training? How important is this in your life?
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