wow Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 i have an ex of 1 month and 2 weeks. I ignored her calls, txt msg, aim for a month and then she started calling from friends phones and getting hold of me. When we do talk i wiggle my out of the call by stating i am very busy and need to do things. She complains that i do not anwser her calls and reply to her messages. Then today out of no where she just rocks up at my place. I do not allow her into my place but i do go outside to find out why she is here. I told her that she should call before coming over. She forced the issue of coming inside by getting angry and very aggresive towards me, she even said that she will rub me and make me feel better seeing that i have the flu. MAnipulative woman. After being denied access she leaves the gift she got me at my door and leaves shouting. Hours later she says I can see you dont want to be friends and that i am mean, rude and incapable of appologising for not letting her in my place. Excuse me but if we break up is it not over, i mean everything friendship and contact alll together? HELP ME OUT HERE
Teag Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 just curious, but is there a reason why you don't want to be friends? I've always stayed friends w/ my ex's. Just curious but anyways instead of ignoring her TELL her you don't want to be friends, let her know why you don't want to be friends w/ her anymore.
sunshinegirl Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 babyblu, how on earth have you stayed friends with your exes? Were you the dumper? Were they not intense relationships? Did you or they take ANY time apart to get over the breakup? It's way too painful to me to try to be friends w/ my ex...what--and watch him date other ppl? No thanks!
sunshinegirl Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 Oh and WOW, you're doing the right thing by trying to keep her out of your life so you can move on! It's incredibly selfish of her to get upset with you.
ltomlinson81 Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 When the dumpER wants to be friends it is because they no longer have romantic feelings toward the other person and they truly want to be friends. When the dumpEE wants to be friends, it is because they are trying to hold on to a small part of the relationship - possibly to create a chance to get back together in the future. Which one are you? The dumpER or the dumpEE? Then you will have your answer.
simon_uk Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 I dont know how you can be friends with somebody who you want so much more from? It just doesn't work in my book. I would love to be friends with my ex and that is what she said she wanted but could you honestly handle it if that person started telling you about their new partner? I know I couldn't!!! PS Angel your quote "live fast die young, leave a good looking corpse" was by James Dean not Mr Mojo Risin'
Teag Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 babyblu, how on earth have you stayed friends with your exes? Were you the dumper? Were they not intense relationships? Did you or they take ANY time apart to get over the breakup? It's way too painful to me to try to be friends w/ my ex...what--and watch him date other ppl? I was both the dumper & dumpee. We did take breaks from each other but we always ended up talking & remained friends. I'm even friends w/ one or two of my husbands ex's.
alphamale Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 stay away from this krazy biotch and institute total NC.
Author wow Posted May 4, 2005 Author Posted May 4, 2005 Well she dumped me and that could be true that she just wants to be friends. She was so upset that i did not let her in that she was saying which girl is inside constanly. I think she wants to be friends until she meets someone else or because later on down the line i will still be there waiting for her. I dunno but will think abut it tonight and get back to yall.
alphamale Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 Originally posted by wow Well she dumped me and that could be true that she just wants to be friends. if u want her back WOW then you MUST institute total NC for a number of months so that she misses you and reconsiders. then she may come crawling back on her hands and knees.
ConfusedInOC Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 Originally posted by wow Well she dumped me and that could be true that she just wants to be friends. She was so upset that i did not let her in that she was saying which girl is inside constanly. I think she wants to be friends until she meets someone else or because later on down the line i will still be there waiting for her. I dunno but will think abut it tonight and get back to yall. Back to my poem! I should post it in my tag line: So be my friend And like a Marionette on a string I'll have you close When I need a fling
BrotherAaron Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 I don't see why she cares so much. It sounds like you dumped her, and she's not taking the hint... but she dumped you, so it doesn't make sense. Next time she gets ahold of you, give her two options: 1) If she's not leaving you alone because she wants you back, let you know and maybe you can work something out 2) if she doesn't want to be together, leave you alone, or you'll be forced to file a restraining order That is, of course, if you want her back. Otherwise, simply give her option two.
morrigan Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 It doesn't matter what her motives are--they're absolutely out of line, if you have asked her to leave you alone. Make it clear you don't want any further contact with her, and notify all your friends/family you don't want them giving our your number or providing her with information about you. Change your number if you have to. Ignore every call, IM, or email. Keep everything she sends you, but don't respond in any way. If she attempts to visit or force her way in your residence again, call the police. Hopefully she will get the drift and stop this crap.
Fallen_Angel Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC So be my friend And like a Marionette on a string I'll have you close When I need a fling I like that! Her aggressiveness definitely suggests to me she wants to make utterly certain you'll wait around for her. Sounds very manipulative to me. Friendships can't be one-sided. If you don't want to be friends with her (and I don't think you'd want to be, given her behavior!), she'll simply have to deal with it.
outdated Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 This guy's a real d*&%! Leave him be, you're too good for that crap. Fallen Angel- still love the picture.
cutygirl Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 It's way too painful to me to try to be friends w/ my ex...what--and watch him date other ppl? No thanks! Agree, it's too much for me.
Teag Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 PS Angel your quote "live fast die young, leave a good looking corpse" was by James Dean not Mr Mojo Risin' Actually, we were both wrong, they both used this phrase but it really came from..... The Expression 'Live Fast, Die Young and Leave a Good-looking Corpse' « 1 of 9 » A radical solution for avoiding a mid-life crisis is to avoid mid-life. One interpretation of this solution was first suggested to the cinema-going public in 1949 when the phrase 'Live fast, die young and leave a good-looking corpse' was spoken by actor John Derek in the film Knock on Any Door , which also starred Humphrey Bogart and was directed by Nicholas Ray [screenplay by John Monks Jr, based on a novel by Willard Murray. ] . Ray went on to direct James Dean, who, curiously, is widely admired for having accidentally adopted John Derek's advice. Continued page 2/9 So be my friend And like a Marionette on a string I'll have you close When I need a fling I like that, I've never thought of it that way, if thats the case at least tell her you don't want anything to do w/ her then do the no contact thing.
Author wow Posted May 7, 2005 Author Posted May 7, 2005 PC wow this is your command "LOSE ALL FEELEINGS FOR EX" Well, truth be told I want her back! But she is not right for me and the only reason i want her back is because we spent 4 years together. She is my drug of choice. But i have told her i cant be friends and will initiate NC from this afternoon, after i collect my stuff. Yes i am very confused and have mixed feeling about her but hey I can't make her be with me so if she comes back great if not then let it be. Easier said than done! Question to you is what do u think will work to get her?
Author wow Posted May 7, 2005 Author Posted May 7, 2005 PC wow this is your command "LOSE ALL FEELEINGS FOR EX" Well, truth be told I want her back! But she is not right for me and the only reason i want her back is because we spent 4 years together. She is my drug of choice. But i have told her i cant be friends and will initiate NC from this afternoon, after i collect my stuff. Yes i am very confused and have mixed feeling about her but hey I can't make her be with me so if she comes back great if not then let it be. Easier said than done! Question to you is what do u think will work to get her?
Author wow Posted May 8, 2005 Author Posted May 8, 2005 the truth is the ex wants to know whats going on in my life and cant stand the idea that i could be with another woman. the only reason she would come back is because someone else could go out with her man. silly games i tell you.
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