camtheman Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 So I met this girl at a house party, got her phone number and we started texting quite a lot. We instantly got on well, after three months and a lot of texts we go out for a meal. Everything goes great, we chat for hours then go for a walk and sit on the beach for a cuddle and drinks. We end up back at mine and we start kissing etc. She texts me 'thanks for a lovely evening xx' when she gets home. The next day she invites me round to her friends house for dinner and tells me to bring my house mate. We go and eat and talk etc. During the week she heads back home to london, I continue to text her, happy birthday, how was your night? as it was her birthday...but it seems like she's gone cold, didn't get a reply for 2 days... then this weekend she comes down to brighton and texts me saying 'im coming down this weekend, are you around?' I say yes and I just bumped into her house mates who invited me to a bbq for her birthday! (which she hasn't invited me to). She says 'seriously don't come'. Then says no i'm joking, it's on ...road. So I turn up to the BBQ with a group of friends and she totally ignores me. Is almost rude to me (She had obviously had quite a lot to drink). I stay anyway because I have a lot of other friends at this BBQ. After the BBQ we all head out to a club in town. The same thing continues, she totally ignores me...I leave annoyed and confused. At 6am she texts me saying 'tonight got strange'. I reply the next day saying 'yes it was strange - it felt like you didn't want me there at all'. She text back saying 'I'm so sorry, I don't remember the night, I got too wasted, I did want you there but I was too drunk...' During the night I made an effort to dance with her and speak to her but she kept obviously avoiding me. Now I don't know what to do........??? I would appreciate some advice! I'm really confused... 1
Satu Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 You can carry on speaking to her if you're happy being friends, because it looks like thats as far as she wants to go at the moment.
fitnessfan365 Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 I'm curious. Why spend three months texting with her before FINALLY asking her out? If you'd asked her out in that first week, you could have found out what type of person she was before getting super invested. Since she's been flaky and acted coldly towards you in person, I'd say to back off. You should only continue to pursue women that are mutually interested IMO. If she reaches out, cut to the chase and make plans. Otherwise, I'd say just to move on. She sounds like she doesn't know what she wants and is more hassle than what she's worth.
IronZ Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 I'm curious. Why spend three months texting with her before FINALLY asking her out? If you'd asked her out in that first week, you could have found out what type of person she was before getting super invested. Since she's been flaky and acted coldly towards you in person, I'd say to back off. You should only continue to pursue women that are mutually interested IMO. If she reaches out, cut to the chase and make plans. Otherwise, I'd say just to move on. She sounds like she doesn't know what she wants and is more hassle than what she's worth. This is a good point. In my experience I'm tired of doing all the chasing and having women disappear for no reason. We should all want someone who is mutually interested. OP I think you should back off and let her figure things out. If she wants you she needs to make an effort.
hakim Posted July 20, 2015 Posted July 20, 2015 Maybe she just enjoyed the cuddling, kissing and dinner date, but appart from that she's not too bothered. Maybe she has a boyfriend, maybe shes more interested in another bloke? I've been in situations like this a couple times, and for me the best way to tackle it is to walk away.
Author camtheman Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 Thanks for the feedback. Some good advice! I am going to be backing off her for sure, I will leave it up to her to contact me if she wants to. After having a think about it, she had a lot of her friends come up, one of them could have been a romantic interest and that would explain why she didn't want me around...It really felt like she didn't want me there which is totally baffling considering our past communication. I had asked her out pretty much straight away when I first met her but she always had plans...Now at least I know not to waste my time with flaky people.
Recommended Posts