Amas5750 Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 What do you think about relying on yourself for happiness? I think it's so important because if you rely on a partner for your happiness then it can be robbed from you (as I'm learning). What are ways to make yourself happy? What do people think of this idea?
StalwartMind Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 You are quite correct. None of us should rely on others for anything really, as it has the potential to lead to disappointment. I know what makes me happy, I have enough interests to occupy myself for the rest of this life, with that said though I also don't rob myself from the pleasure that others can provide me. The more your happiness relies on others, then the less direct control you have over your mood etc. In a sense you should consider all other people for being like a bonus to your happiness levels. Some people who reciprocate well with you, respect you and hopefully are honest too, can enhance any happiness you currently feel or are able to achieve on your own. This is how it's meant to be for me at least. Not to be negative either, but there just are no guarantees with life, which is why it is all the more important to do ourselves the favor of setting up our life in such a way that we will always have something to hold on to, that we know can get us through any situation. Having a strong mind and will helps with that, and again this can be so easily corrupted by that of others. Humans are masters at ruining things for others if we allow them to. By all means life can be a very difficult and complex maze, but if we learn to deal with things in healthy ways and also protect our own interests,then we can lessen the amount of daily disappointment we might face otherwise. 3
RainDown Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 What do you think about relying on yourself for happiness? I think it's so important because if you rely on a partner for your happiness then it can be robbed from you (as I'm learning). What are ways to make yourself happy? What do people think of this idea? I think it's a fine idea if that's what you really want and who you really are. I haven't been in a relationship for years and I'm happier than I've ever been. For me, it wasn't so much a decision as it was just my natural evolution. I'm lucky to have work that inspires me and brings me joy, friends who are loyal, smart, and share my interests, and I have a natural curiosity about any and everything that I explore through learning, travel and education. I'm happy on my own and like being able to do what I want, go where I want, and explore my interests without having to factor a relationship into the mix. For others though, the lack of a relationship makes them feel as if something is missing in their life, no matter how happy they are in other respects.
Honey565 Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 I think it's a fine idea if that's what you really want and who you really are. I haven't been in a relationship for years and I'm happier than I've ever been. For me, it wasn't so much a decision as it was just my natural evolution. I'm lucky to have work that inspires me and brings me joy, friends who are loyal, smart, and share my interests, and I have a natural curiosity about any and everything that I explore through learning, travel and education. I'm happy on my own and like being able to do what I want, go where I want, and explore my interests without having to factor a relationship into the mix. For others though, the lack of a relationship makes them feel as if something is missing in their life, no matter how happy they are in other respects. I am similar like you, but still i suffer and feel something is missing because i am not in relationship, because i i find it very important. It is not a problem if you think it will be for some years, it is great. I like and can be on my own and feel good. But i am scared that i will just never find again what i need. It is something that i want. I think that you must rely on yourself to be happy, but you just can't be happy all the time. And still, happiness and peace still depend from factors around you. That is my opinion. If you have gone through divorce, you just can't be happy. It is false happiness. It is normal to feel just regular or unhappy. It is perfectly normal to be down at times. Sorrow will make you better individual. This is society that does not allow people to feel pain. I have headache, take pill....no, pain is a helper. Pain signals that something is wrong and you cannot mask it with "no, i will be happy right now, let's make it go away"...no, feel it and learn from it. Don't escape from it. We are humans, we are not perfect. We feel huge range of emotions. The point is not to go to the extremes. It is not, avoid pain. No, just do not allow yourself to succumb to it. If you feel like you want to stay at home and cry, do it. Please yourself. But next day, force yourself to go out..etc.. You won't remember this period as the most happy of your life, but you can remember it as useful for something. Like you did something good for yourself. Do things that depend just on you and not anybody else. Make some big change, learn new language, travel somewhere you always wanted. Yes, you will feel like robot, doing it mechanically and not feeling real joy, but in the end, you will still have nice memories, trust me. Then when it comes new period of happiness, you will be more happy. That is life...a bit of happiness...a bit of unhappiness and constant fight.
casey.lives Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 ive never needed someone to make me happy.. what i need someone who doesn't make me unhappy.. 1
No Limit Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 Never needed anyone to make me happy. Money perhaps to finance it, but that's it. What makes me happy? Little luxuries I do for myself are the best - like a hot bath with some music to relax. Or have a party weekend with friends. Or just travel to another city and take the weekend off. Breakfast in bed... there's so many possibilities.
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