GalWithNiceGuyFriend Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 (edited) I need some advice on this. A bit of key notes: He is 4 years younger than me (32-33 and 28-29). Known him for almost 9 yrs. Different cultural backgrounds.Different races. Worked together in the past (that's how we met). We don't hang out all the time, but he has always helped me here and there (moving etc). We hug sometimes and talk about past failed 'relationships' (I have never really been in any myself) but we never have sexual topics. Recently I have been going through some stuff. He has been supportive and encouraging and we went for lunch to just talk. He told me he has broken up with his on and off girlfriend (I have met her. Nice girl I think but I don't know her well). So a few days after lunch, for the first time he invited me to his place. He had moved so it was sort of like seeing his new house. We talked more, checked out music, photos etc. No sexual stuff. Just laughter and life topics. And, now, he is coming over to my place for lunch or dinner sometime soon (this is a casual invite I made when I got back home that night and said 'thank you for today.' He immediately said yes, very enthusiastically). After the invite, I somehow started thinking about this seriously. Should I have done that? Now I'm starting to think about it differently. The hugs, the way he looks at me (now it's all sexy to me, after all this time). However I must say 3 different people at different times have in the past mistaken us to be couple. With the latest one saying to me "You should go out, you two". Am I sinking in love or lust with my longtime 'just some friend'? I have always dismissed this guy as 'too young' but now I'm nervous and excited at the same time. I must admit we do have a lot in common but I'm careful not to stuff things up. What I can't imagine is losing him if something happens and we stop talking completely. Has anyone else been in this position? And, from a guy's perspective, do you think he might be thinking this stuff too. Maybe he is just being nice? He is a nice guy after all. Can men and women just be friends? Your thoughts, please. I am not a saint but I am the average nice girl...I have no thoughts about hurting anyone. Edited July 19, 2015 by GalWithNiceGuyFriend
Candygirljane Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 I'm pretty sure he still has a crush on u. He told u that he broke up with his ex gf which means " hey, I'm single now". It seems like u have feelings for him
Author GalWithNiceGuyFriend Posted July 19, 2015 Author Posted July 19, 2015 I'm pretty sure he still has a crush on u. He told u that he broke up with his ex gf which means " hey, I'm single now". It seems like u have feelings for him[/quote. Thanks, Candy.Remember though, that there has never been a discussion about feelings between us. Just feelings towards other people, e.g a crush I had (that he did not approve of) and his feelings for his on-and-off girlfriend. Ours has always been 'just good friends'.
Candygirljane Posted July 19, 2015 Posted July 19, 2015 i think guys can like lots of women and have feelings for them at the same time. :/ and i don't think a woman and a guy could be pure friends, because of the sexual attraction,unless one of them is homosexual. but it depends
Author GalWithNiceGuyFriend Posted July 20, 2015 Author Posted July 20, 2015 He is not gay, so I really hope I have a chance with him. I don't know how I dismissed this guy all these years.
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